honk

Like sometimes they want to experiment with a bit of anal and instead of just buying a sex toy and some lube like a normal person, they instead shove random objects up their ass that inevitably get stuck and then they try to get them out by themselves which makes things worse and then they lie to doctors about it and like this all leads to all kinds of extra complications like internal damage, risk of infections, bleeding, the fall of Yugoslavia, etc.

It’s the no-internet dinosaur’s birthday!!

I can get behind that

ABSOLUTE FAVORITES

The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells. Sci-fi series, space opera-ish. You've got a lot of recs for this already.

Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie. Sci-fi space opera. I've only read the first one still but it's brilliant.

Piranesi by Sunanna Clarke. Fantasy. A man lives alone in an infinite House over an equally infinite ocean. Ethereal and luminous and melancholy and beautiful.

Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. Sci-fi thriller. Cloning! Dinosaurs! Math! I still love it.

WEIRD AND INTERESTING

The Jewels of Aptor by Samuel Delaney. Weird 1960s science-fantasy. The main characters could be read as romantic if you want - the homoeroticism can't be unintentional - but there isn't Romance Proper in it.

Werecockroach by Polenth Blake. Alien invasion/animal shapeshifter story. Novella. Zany and fast-paced. Aroace agender protagonist like the author.

And What Can We Offer You Tonight by Premee Mohamed. Sorta dystopian strange fantasy in an urban setting. Novella. The main characters are sex workers of the high-class courtesan prostitute type, and after one of them is murdered by a client, she comes back to life - and sets out on a whirlwind of freedom and revenge and justice she never got while alive.

Princess Floralinda and the Forty-Flight Tower by Tamsyn Muir. Novella. Fractured-fairy-tale fantasy. Told in a snarky, sardonic style, not nearly as upbeat as it initially seems.

The Black God's Drums by P. Djèlí Clark. Steampunk-fantasy. Novella. YA-ish? Steampunk New Orleans and a Black girl who can talk to the Orisha falls into a plot to steal a scientist's superweapon.

Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger. Urban fantasy, YA. Urban fantasy in an all-myths-are-real kind of sense from a Lipan Apache perspective, starring an Apache girl who can talk to ghosts trying to solve her cousin's murder. Asexual protagonist with no interest in romance or partnering; it's refreshing and the sort of YA I would have loved as a teen.

HAVEN'T READ THIS BUT I KEEP MEANING TO

Firebreak by Nicole Kornher-Stace. Cyberpunk. No romance at all. VR and stuff. NKS is aroace and centering non-romantic experiences was her explicit goal here.

SOME ROMANCE BUT IT'S NOT A MAJOR FOCUS

Synners by Pat Cadigan. Cyberpunk. A kaleidoscopic whirlwind of a book with lots of characters with lots of varied relationships; romance is among them but not alone and certainly not the focus.

Three Parts Dead by Max Gladstone. Urban fantasy, sort of - it's like a fantasy-kitchen-sink world with gods whose contracts power the magic in the world, so magicians are lawyers and lawyers are magicians and one lawyer-magician has to solve the murder of, and resurrect, a murdered god before his magic grinds to a halt and the city powered by his magic collapses. I'm not doing this description justice - it was vivid and compelling. The main characters do not have any romance, but a supporting character has a toxic ex she can't fully get over that features as a sideplot in the story.

Finna by Nino Cipri. Weird, universe-hopping science-fantasy. IKEA has a tendency to rip open portals to other universes and the minimum wage employees gotta deal with it. The two main characters were dating but have recently broken up, and they don't get back together but rather figure out how to be friends again after the breakup.

The Discworld series by Terry Pratchett- many discworld books have little or no romance, imo. It's a fantasy series set on a flat or "disc" world. The books are only loosely connected so you can pick up whatever book catches your eye. Many readers recommend starting with Guards, Guards! (Fair warning, that one does have a romance, but it has my aroace approval)

The Earthsea cycle by Ursula LeGuin- this is one of my favorites because there is no romance in sight until book 4! And even so book 4 is quite good. It's a fantasy series set on a magical archipelago, and follows the epic highs and lows of life as a wizard struggling with hubris and mortality and destiny. You could read up to book 3 and it would have a satisfying conclusion, or you could read book 4 if you have the patience for romance. Either way its a fun read!

Fly By Night and Fly Trap by Frances Hardinge- this is a middle-grade/YA duology set in a sort of steampunk, vaguely European world where writing has been heavily censored and reading is considered a dangerous skill. The protagonist is a feral little 12 year old who is obsessed with reading. I love her dearly. There is some background romance happening with adult characters but the protagonist is so thoroughly uninterested it's hilarious to read from her perspective. I love this duology so much.

The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison- Recommendations for The Hands of the Emperor seem to go hand in hand (lol) with The Goblin Emperor. If you enjoy one, odds are good you'll enjoy the other! The Goblin Emperor is a stand-alone fantasy about an unlikely heir who has to navigate court intrigue now that he is on the throne. There's also a series set in the same world (The Cemetaries of Amalo series) which follows a different protagonist, and is also very good but arguably does have romance in it. The final installment isn't out yet so the outcome remains to be seen, and again, it has my aroace approval.

The Angel of the Crows by Katherine Addison- while I'm at it I might as well recommend another one by miss Addison. This one is a Sherlock Holmes retelling set in a supernatural version of London. Its got a for reals, canon aroace + agender Sherlock and I love it for that reason!

I'm regretting not listing a few of my faves in the actual post when I went on my rant, bc while I've seen Discworld and the Matthew Swift books recc'd (Matthew Swift is my GOLD STANDARD for urban fantasy), I hadn't seen two other really good ones that I'd mentioned in my tags.

The House of Discarded Dreams by Ekaterina Sedia is a wonderfully surreal story about being adrift in life, and finding strength by coming to know yourself. It features a poc lgbt protag (and a bit of a crush, but that's not at all the focus), and the action itself is a magical and bizarre blend of myth, folk tales, history, and dream-logic.

The Secret History of Moscow is also by Ekaterina Sedia. It's a melancholy and poetic story that follows a girl trying to save her sister from a curse, and meeting figures out of Russian folk tales along the way.

I felt like I needed to clarify some things before we could continue any more conversations on this godforsaken website.

American badger: pallas cat of a wolverine.  Very defensive.  Fuck immediately off. 

Bonus African badger:  Silverback gorilla of mustelids.  Should be a cryptid.  Bro, don’t even.  You are nothing to him.

gets a bad rap

eats A LOT of ticks

“plays dead”

cute

VS

Possum (AUS)

Looks soft, isn’t

Quills are thin and flexible like hairs

Can climb trees

Perpetual bedhead

Smelly

Porcupine (Africa)

Does not look even remotely soft

Very long, stiff quills, especially on its back half

Can rattle hollow quills in its tail as a threat

Cannot climb trees

Will ram you ass-first to stab you if it’s mad

Porcupine (South/Central America)

Prehensile tail like a monkey

Short, thick quills

Snout looks like a marshmallow

Can hang from tree branches by its tail