all the softness of a switchblade covered in blood

"The hat is customizable," he said, struggling with the velcro patch on the front. "If I need it, I have an ICE one too. I pick based off the business i walk into."

"Customizable is an important hat descriptor," I said. "what can I get you?"

"You wouldn't believe how offended people get these days," he said. "And I'm supposed to do something about it if you're offended? You chose to be offended!"

"We all have hundreds of thousands of decisions everyday," I said. I thickened my accent. "That's what my stepdad always said. But I can make one easier - we have a delicious Ethiopian roast available."

"Like if I told you you have a bull ring," he said, "because bulls have rings in their noses. Is that offensive?"

I laughed. "I've heard that before."

"It's a joke, but people get offended. Maybe you're offended."

I looked at him. I smiled. "You aren't trying to offend me though, right?"

Of course he was. I was being friendly and the friendlier I was, the faster he switched topics. He was saying anything inflammatory he could think of to see if I'd take the bait. After about 20 minutes of my redirecting and deescalating, he settled into a more normal interaction. He took up too much of my time showing me a product I'd feigned mild interest in to get him to stop talking about getting accused of inappropriate behavior at work. When we finally disengaged, he spent 10 minutes trying to catch my eye again. When he failed, he left.

There's this new breed of customer who insists on trying to incite political conversation through their clothing and, when that doesnt work, their snide little comments. If I owned my own business, maybe I would have given the guy the fight he wanted. But I work for a corporation and I love paying my bills so I deescalated.

Your tags pass Peer Review

Benthic Organism: golly I sure do love metabolizing things slowly and efficiently

Benthic Organism: those are VERY bright lights

Benthic Organism: oh boy we’re going up

God I wish

Me, posting, allegedly:

Or actually probably one of these guys:

Struggling with your femininity can be a transfeminine experience.

Struggling with your masculinity can be a transmasculine experience.

Struggling with your masculinity can be a transfeminine experience.

he's constantly shaking his head in a strange way, like he has an itch that he absolutely cannot get to. he's prone to ear infections, but this is a new behaviour, and his ear isn't hot or inflamed at all, but something is obviously bothering him. he's started walking with a head tilt and becoming lethargic. i need to get him to the vets, he is very clearly in pain.

here he is (with his brother in the second pic). he is my very best friend

if this is something we can sort out and identify quickly and just get medicine for, it will be around £100. i have insurance if it extra mega expensive fast, but i would still have to pay £134.50 to cover excess and fees, and i don't have that right now. (this is what happened just over two weeks ago when he needed his last vet visit.)

i do not have £134 right now. i do not have £100 right now. i have £40 to cover food for the next few weeks. this is the second required vet visit in under a month. i don't know how much more i can take of the money situation being as bad as it is. i don't know what to do. i hate begging, i'm so sorry.

if you can, here's my ko-fi or i have an (adult horror) story for sale on itch.io, otherwise heres my comm info:

pencil stuff - £15 bust, £20 full body. simple colours or monochrome, please provide references paintings - £40, please provide references

i need to get my dog to the vet as quickly as i can manage, they will not do payment plans, etc. for this reason i can't take on anything complex at this time. i'm really sorry.

please reblog if you can't otherwise help