Celestial Green Beans

honestly "oracle that nobody believes" is such a solid trope. imagine trying to convince anybody in 2006 what the next two decades was gonna look like

Cassandra: I have seen the future and it is really, really stupid. They're hiding in the fucking horse.

It used to be cold. There used to be all these bugs.

Maybe he understood for the first time that to the boy he was himself an alien. A being from a planet that no longer existed. The tales of which were suspect. He could not construct for the child’s pleasure the world he’d lost without constructing the loss as well and he thought perhaps the child has known this better than he.

The grass used to be green in the summer not brown

In autumn, puddles would freeze overnight, and give the sharpest, sweetest snap when you stepped on them. All gone by late morning, but reappearing the next day with sharp crinkles and chimes.

mayflies used to coat the road so thoroughly in spring that their corpses made the road more slippery than black ice.

Why did every gas station have the windshield cleaners? Because driving down the highway resulted in your windshield getting caked with dead bugs.

I miss Christmas beetles. They used to be so abundant we would collect them and put them on our heads until we had living crowns of gold. I haven't seen a single one in years.

I used to be able to chase fire flies in my back yard as a child. I’d catch them in my hands and then release… I don’t see them anymore here

you have to understand that my body does not work by default. “ohhh so many medications means so many chemicals inside you. i could never” well if i did not take these things i would not be able to function. i respect and have made peace with the chemical. Get out of my face

Item: Corset of Visibility

the thing about fiber art that nobody tells you about is that every single kind of fiber art is a gateway drug to other kinds of fiber art.

people say folks with adhd struggle with "delayed rewards" aka long term goals and as such we tend to focus more on short term rewards. what they don't talk about is that at when we Do accomplish long term goals we don't actually feel anything proportionate to the amount of work we did to achieve it. In my head I suffered for a while and then money spontaneously appeared in my bank account.

"Don't you feel satisfied that your windows are so clean now?" It sucked and it sucked and now I don't care. I just remember the sucking.

#when you’re both gay and one of you is stuck at a family dinner so you plan an elaborate rescue mission

Like idk, maybe that custom embroidered pet potrait is $100+ because that person has spent the last 15 years perfecting their thread painting technique to create beautiful pieces that actually look like your pet and they want the price to reflect not just the hours they'll spend working on it but also the years they've spent building up their skillset to the point where you want their art as a permanent reminder of your pet.

we need to keep this circulating so it can find the people who are about to stay up for 3 to 4 hours

forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware

to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day

I'm going to start a game show where I play songs the contestants have never heard before in a huge room with bad acoustics and they have to guess what the lyrics are