1. Unhealthy devotion is a must. You can have side chicks but the cult comes first.
2. Stay in your lane, or feel the pain.
3. The working class eats last.
4. Always pray to God before meals.
5. In accordance to child labor laws they must be in high school before they can be exploited.
6. New recruits get put in charge of the guns for one night.
7. To become sheriff you need to have exploited at least one teenager for free labor.
8. Sheriff replaces the president after they die, retire, get a promotion, or become evil.
9. You have until 12 am to replace your sheriff after they die, retire, get a promotion, or become evil.
10. All four gangs gather under the full moon. No fighting, no stabbing, no murder, and no immolation at this time.
11. Protect your borders. Intimidate all passerby.
12. Don't be a dick, help kids.
13. The president's word is law, no other branches of government may intervene.
14. Don't murder. Unless they're asking for it.
15. Fuck the upper class.
16. Band together when necessary. There's no cult if all the cult members are dead.
Bonus
Medicine cats are not legally allowed to fuck in any circumstance whatsoever.
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Flamepaw: Sigh. I guess nobody understands what it’s like to live up to such an important figure.
(I’m not very excited for Flamepaw as a pov when his shtick to get us excited for the new book is centered around living up to Firestar’s legacy. And literally half his Clanmates are Firestar kin.)
With all the new tier lists being shown recently, I thought I’d use their alignment chart to make a meme post.
Main Characters Cinnamon Roll Meme!
Firestar - is a handsome ginger kitty, has killed two cats (and a rat). he will cut a bitch
Feathertail - girl is HARDCORE she took down a mountain lion with stalactites
Gray Wing - is soft and gentle but he has killed before
Flametail - is an uwu soft boi medicine cat but tried to killed jayfeather in TLH
Leafpool - a very cute kitty but possesses knowledge of how to murder efficiently
Bristlefrost - your girl next door who wants a house with a white picket fence
Alderheart - yet another soft boi medicine cat
Shadowsight - Alderheart but worse, exists to suffer
Dovewing - has never done anything wrong in her life, ever
Squirrelflight - very fluffy, very protective, very soft and caring
Twigbranch - looks tough but would never consider killing a cat
Jayfeather - resting bitch face and possesses knowledge to murder, but he's very compassionate
Rootspring - has a perpetual grumpy face but is very nice
Thunder - big burly tom with huge feet, very intimidating; is also trying his best
Hollyleaf - looks like she can kill a cat, HAS killed a cat, but has a gentle side
Violetshine - looks intimidating, and has tried to murder a tyrannical dictator with poppy seeds
Clear Sky - looks intimidating, is intimidating, has killed 6 cats
Ivypool - looks scary, IS scary, did not hesitate to kill to keep her cover
Bramblestar - looks like Tigerstar, has killed 2 cats, one even twice
Lionblaze - if looks could kill, lionblaze would win. but he's also killed 3 cats too
As someone who tries to make a readable timeline of the books, the original arc is such a pain in my tail.
For the first arc, cats don't progress and grow in a specific period of time, they are just Children until they become a warrior and then suddenly they are Adults. It's like Moonkitti's illustrations in her "I spoil videos" where they suddenly grow 6 inches immediately when they become a warrior. But the truth of this is that cats like Gorsepaw who died a leetle kitty was actually 15 or 16 moons old, and most warriors become warriors at 12 moons. But that doesn't matter because he's supposed to be a young apprentice who dies tragically even when the timeline says otherwise. It's just hurhhghgghgh
Then again, maybe this continues to the modern era. Rootspring suddenly gains broad shoulders and six pack when he becomes a warrior.
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Thinking about Ferncloud and Ashfur's father. I utterly disregard what the website says about Whitestorm being the father because it worsens the already incestuous relations and tells us Whitestorm was a womanizer with kits from two queens, which he never demonstrates to us as an audience. So that leaves the potential father of these two as Longtail, Runningwind, and Darkstripe. Longtail never shows an interest in kits, and Runningwind is much the same. But you know who does have kits? Tigerstar. You know who idolizes Tigerstar? Darkstripe.
I could see it being within Darkstripe's character to emulate his idol by trying to be like him (I will note Fern and Ash were born before Tiger and Tawny, but the “big strong alpha male [tom?]” is Tigerstar's shtick that Darkstripe would want to copy). But I don't see a relationship with Brindleface being romantic, probably akin to a one-night stand like Daisy and Spiderleg. Heck, with the way toms react to finding out they’re fathers in this universe, he may not even realize Ashfur and Ferncloud are his. Brindleface never names the father, so perhaps the father wanted nothing to do with his kits, or didn't realize he had kits. It gives some interest to the idea of Darkstripe ending up apprenticing his own daughter and treating her badly.
Thinking about Winds of Change and how bad Mudclaw was. Mudclaw just proves why he'd be a bad leader with his pettiness and immaturity towards Ashfoot, his belief he’s too good for menial labor, as well as his territorial behavior and desire to distance relations after a life-changing event where everyone is recovering and starting a war is absolutely foolish. Onestar and Tallstar are absolutely correct. It's advantageous to keep those friendly relations during such a sensitive and uncertain time. Then it's turned up to 11 when he decides "ohh nooo, a fox is going to attack Onewhisker ohh nooo ),: ". And it's especially annoying in order to make Hawkfrost seem competent, they had to dumb Mudclaw down to make it work.
But it did have one good thing, and that's Tornear. Tornear my beloved...you deserve a better brother. Nightcloud’s makeup was also on point.
All in all, this just proves that Ashfoot is the correct choice, and should have been picked to be leader to begin with. #Ashstar2024
This is suuuuper late (a month late in fact), but I did make a list of cats on April 2nd who I thought could exhibit autistic traits. I used CDC data that 1/54 people are autistic, and applied it to the number of characters we had in April at that time. That’s 24.78 (rounded to 25) cats I went searching for based on their traits and just general vibe.
Some of these are just vibe (like Kestrelflight entirely being headcanon), but others like Dovewing already exhibit some traits like sensory overload and others like Leopardstar symbolically have a harder time at Clan life due to her being a drypaw. Then there’s ones like Mumblefoot, who maybe had trouble communicating as a kit, and Fuzz who is literal minded. Curlypaw left SkyClan and maybe she felt just didn’t fit the Clan lifestyle. Fidgetflake conjures in my head someone who can’t stay still and is constantly moving (a la stimming).
Overall, it was an interesting list to consider and apply these traits to these characters as someone autistic myself. Maybe I’ll come up with more in a year or so.
Ah, opinions. That old chestnut. I do want to get back to sharing thoughts on this cursed series but sometimes lack Motivation (trademark pending). So here’s a list below of the main characters in the main book series and how I would rank them.
Note: aVoS and DotC are excluded because I have not read them yet. I don’t want to give thoughts on something I have limited knowledge of.
Hollyleaf: 9/10. The perfect storm of everything I like combined with a dynamic story and complex character. She's not perfectly consistent and I recognize those faults but no other warriors character captivates me in how strong a presence she has.
Squirrelflight: 8.5/10. What I like about her is her growth from annoying apprentice to headstrong warrior. I love she doesn't filter her thoughts and she'll break rules and the societal norm to do what's right. She's selfless, compassionate and complex, and really, really needs a break.
Ivypool: 8/10. I do believe rereading my opinion on Ivypool might lower since she's underutilized in OotS. But more so I love the idea of Ivypool, what she could have been. And that concept colors my perception of her in an ideal world where that happened.
Rootspring: 7/10. Rootspring is very good, until he isn't. Like Feathertail he's very likeable when he's taking on an active role as Rootpaw, but when he becomes a warrior he loses some of the dynamic-ness and personality he had as an apprentice. Come TPoNS, he's become a window reacting without any flair of the personality he once had.
Dovewing: 6.5/10. I used to dislike Dovewing, finding her hard to read about in OotS because she acted like a child (as children are want to do). While now I've grown to appreciate her more, she doesn't leave a big impact on me. I don't have a lot of investment in her character, and so I am indifferent to her in the books.
Jayfeather: 6.5/10. Jayfeather I have complex feelings about, because while I do think he's a good character, I for the life of me cannot make myself like him as a person (er, cat). I have settled on indifference towards him because he has settled into his role as gruff medicine cat and I just sort of mentally check out.
Firestar: 5/10. Firestar...is a warm bowl of soup. Not bad, not amazing, but it fills the belly. I don't gravitate towards him as a character because he's a very safe, very mild character who acts as the typical hero in a young adult/children's novel. I can't say I hate him, but I don't particularly care for him either.
Bristlefrost: 4.5/10. Bristlefrost being so low here is a crime I'll never forgive. She started out so strong, with sound character development, hopes, dreams, ambitions. But it unraveled so quickly, with some of the worst character regression I have ever seen. We need to be going up, not down!
Leafpool: 4/10. Leafpool never started out strong for me, but I actively began to dislike her after how she treated her apprentice/son, and especially after her actions in Leafpool's Wish. She's selfish and bitter all without the intrigue that would bring. I find it hard to accept what the books say as her being a gentle and kind figure when she doesn't act like it in my books.
Lionblaze: 3/10. Lionblaze in PoT was angry hot head guy. Okay, not as good as his siblings but not offensive. Lionblaze in OoTS does nothing but mope over Cinderheart or act as a window. Boring, lazy. Where did his personality go? It's like an incline where he somehow keeps getting worse. By TBC he's at the worst he's ever been and even with his shitty behavior he is continually rewarded for it. You want to get on BC's bad side? Be terrible with no intricacy and get rewarded for it.
Shadowsight: 3/10. Of the three PoVs for TBC, Shadowpaw had been the weakest for me. But it became apparent the writers really wanted him to suffer, even is the injury was literally falling off a cliff. What is so infuriating about Shadowsight is he actively warps the story so he can be painted in a sympathetic light and he does not grow, he does not learn, we're expected to watch him suffer and go 'yep that's a character.' It's especially awful he warps other characters around him for the sake of his suffering.
Bramblestar: How did we get from sweet, brave, dynamic Bramblepaw...to this. As Bramblepaw he was good, very good. He had a great arc denouncing his father and teaching Firestar to not judge him for his father's crimes. Bramblepaw is a 7/10.
But Brambleclaw completely regressed in character to suddenly need his father's approval, and was a moron who didn't listen to Squirrelflight’s concerns 'hey, uh, your brother is kind of evil', and — oh, found it difficult to decide whether or not to kill his leader and commit treason. Firestar should have not made him deputy. I imagine Bramblepaw wouldn't want to be deputy after that if he was still that same character. But no, he gets rewarded for his character regression and idiocy. 2/10.
Bramblestar? He went from idiot rewarded for bad ideas to emotionally abusive partner. His cold shoulder to Squirrel in OotS is manipulative, his actions in SqH are disgusting and gaslighting, and to top it off, the narrative treats him as a good and kindly high king when he clearly has not earned it at all! GOD, I hate Bramblestar. 1/10.
Stormfur: 1/10. By all rights, Stormfur shouldn’t be considered a main character here. But he is so very bad I felt it was my civil duty to include him. If there's one thing worse than being actively shitty, it's doing nothing at all. Stormfur is a dead fish and even then the dead fish probably has more personality. He's the lowest because I cannot think of a single good thing about his character or story. He's bland and boring, does absolutely nothing and gets rewarded for it.
Finally, my revised and updated version of the RiverClan family trees! This will undoubtedly change this upcoming 8th arc but for now, these are my personal headcanons.
Read below for additional info.
Into the Wild to Firestar's Quest
Rather than Mosspelt be Featherkit and Stormkit's foster mother, it was Greenflower. I prefer Mosspelt be apprentice age by the Crookedstar's Promise manga.
Dawnflower gets her pale fur from Echomist.
Pinefur is described with short fur, which seems to be less common in RiverClan, so she certainly was the product of a tryst between a RiverClan warrior and a handsome ginger tom.
Since Rainstorm is described as a blue-gray tom, it got my brain thinking about Stonefur having kits. Shadepelt was available, so I picked her. The story I came up with is Shadepelt hiding her mate's true father because Rainstorm had the misfortune of being born during TigerClan.
Midnight to Leafpool's Wish
Reedwhisker I made younger despite him existing in the original series because he'd be older than Squirrelflight and still deputy by The Broken Code. Shortly into his apprenticeship Mistystar and Blackclaw stopped being mates, after he publicly supported Hawkfrost's bid for deputyship and a long string of isolated events beforehand.
Rippletail gets his fur color through Grasswhisker's father Beetlenose.
Sageheart is a Guy™ who joins RiverClan by TNP and is dead by Eclipse when the full allegiances are given. His kits all take after him.
Icewing has nowhere to get her pure white fur from, even in this pseudo-science system I have, so she became a kittypet's kit. Mistystar saw her father from afar once, and had herself convinced the father was Hawkfrost. She was cold towards Icewing and expected her to prove her loyalty, which Icewing thought was very unfair. Perhaps the events in TBC was the last straw for Icewing.
The Sight to Hollyleaf's Story
Rainstorm was a playboy (tom?) and left Dawnflower for Duskfur. He claimed it was just a one-night thing but Dawnflower wanted something more substantial.
Rippletail was Graymist's first mate. He died before they could have another litter. This led to Graymist becoming attached to Reedwhisker, and they would have kits a little later.
Duckpaw and Tanglepaw are from Battles of the Clans, and apprentices during Fading Echoes, so I made them Rushtail's siblings. I think they died to Greencough.
The Fourth Apprentice to Dovewing's Silence
Pouncetail blamed Hollowflight for his forbidden mate's death because she died giving birth to him after safely giving birth to Mossyfoot. Hollowflight told Ivypool he was bullied but didn't mention most of it came from his own family.
Lizardtail ended up adopted because I became attached to Robinwing x Grasspelt as a concept and wanted the gay dads to adopt. Also, Lizardtail needed an outside source for his kits to get white fur from in my pseudo-science fur inheritance.
In what is the most self-fulfilling headcanon, Mousewhisker and Minnowtail have kits. Minnowtail entrusts Graymist to nurse them and Perchwing and Havenpelt end up adopted by Lizardtail and Grasspelt.
Bramblestar's Storm to Current Day
The tom closest to Curlfeather's age was Jayclaw so I made him Frostkit, Graykit and Mistkit's father.
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In order to combat the pandemic of she-cats in warriors dying for the sake of man pain, I believe we should start killing more toms so women can also experience woman pain. I advocate for true gender equality.
Will you be doing a family tree headcannon for RiverClan???
I have actually finished one! It's for modern RiverClan from CrP to the current arc. I took a break from it because I had a faulty laptop for part of January and all of February. So March is kind of a sit back and chill month. I'd like to post it in April.
I’m just thinking about Her, and why I love her so much.
It isn't because she has a winning personality or is made to be likeable to the audience. Many people understandably do not like the actions she has done in the books.
What I love about Blossomfall is the harsh reality her feelings present in OotS.
She is being neglected emotionally by her mother in favor of an injured for life littermate. The mature response would be to help how she could and put her own feelings aside. But she doesn't. She presents a raw ugliness to the situation. She believes since she wants attention from Millie and is upset at Briarlight that she is a horrible cat who deserves to go to cat hell and can get the attention she wants from Millie there. And this is incredibly relatable to me.
She isn't wrong to want her mother to pay attention to her. And she isn't wrong to be upset she doesn't. She's not wrong for wanting attention either. But the way it is portrayed is her being immature and selfish. And that is what is so relatable.
Sometimes I don't want to be an adult, I want the safety and comfort of youth and to not deal with my problems. Sometimes I hate when my siblings come first and then feel horrible afterwards. I understand the self-loathing and mixed feelings on what she wants versus what others put first. It's this strange amalgamation of guilt, anger, loneliness, selfishness, desire, and loathing. And that is what makes me get Blossomfall.
Hello! While on break I devised a system for aging in warriors and tried to address the inconsistencies in the books about when cats were born (but that's for a later day). Here's what I'm confident with.
There's a read below to spare people from needless scrolling.
Kit
1 moon - 2.5 years
2 moons - 5 years
3 moons - 7.5 years
4 moons - 10 years
5 moons - 12.5 years
6 moons - 15 years
Apprentice
7 moons - 15.5 years
8 moons - 16 years
9 moons - 16.5 years
10 moons - 17 years
11 moons - 17.5 years
Warrior
1 years - 18 years
2 years - 24 years
3 years - 28 years
4 years - 32 years
5 years - 36 years
6 years - 40 years
7 years - 44 years
8 years - 48 years
9 years - 52 years
10 years - 56 years
Elder
11 years - 60 years
12 years - 64 years
13 years - 68 years
14 years - 72 years
15 years - 76 years
16 years - 80 years
17 years - 84 years
18 years - 88 years
19 years - 92 years
20 years - 96 years
So in an ideal warriors without inconsistencies, this is what I see the age ranks as.
- 1 to 5 moons they are considered kits. They receive the fast growth during this time and go through four stages of development.
At 1 moon they can say simple words and phrases, but are way too young to wander outside the nursery unsupervised.
At 2 moons they are elementary school age, akin to being a kindergartener. They can walk around camp as long as someone is watching where they’re headed, but are absolutely not allowed outside of camp.
At 4 moons they are middle school age and able to go outside of camp territory with a warrior watching them.
At 5 moons they will be able to travel freely around camp and start deciding what path they want to take. Medicine cats starts considering apprentices at this age.
- 6 moons is when they become apprentices, equal to starting their Freshman or Sophomore year in high school (by American standards). They are usually sexually mature at this age depending on the cat, but are not considered ready to have a mate and kits until they become a warrior.
- 1 year is the age to become a warrior, and considered a legal adult. Clans do not consider a mate or kits beneath this age because of the power imbalance between apprentice and warrior.
- Past 7 years, cats start to be considered middle aged. They’re more likely to become trusted senior warriors in this age bracket due to developing connections and having greater experience.
- 11 years and onward they are considered old, and ideally would retire between 11 to 12 years of age. This ties with the average age world wide retirement age being between 60 and 65 years. However, this could be lower due to serious strain put on the cat’s body from factors such as poor food diet during Leafbare, battle injuries, and various diseases they catch.
Examples of these include:
Feathertail died at 2.5 years and would be considered young when she died.
Firestar died at 8 years and would be considered middle aged.
Squirrelflight is 9+ years and would be considered middle aged.
Tawnypelt is 11+ years and would be considered old.
Mistystar is 16+ years and geriatric.
People are free to use this system for their own warrior rps and stories if they want! It’s totally fine by me.
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