Let The Ships Sail!

my life isnt perfect but at least im not doing a mans laundry

would you still love me if i was a small iridescent freshwater fish

my most toxic trait is i fucking love work gossip. i play neutral not to be the bigger person or take the high road but to hear slander and hearsay from every side. two coworkers complained about each other to me in the same afternoon and i nearly blacked out from the rush

you shouldnt have to pay for the dentist. the dentist should pay me for satsifying their weird fetish

“oh I’m too old for stuffed animals” skill issue. sorry you can’t appreciate little creatures made to hang out with you, I on the other hand am full of joyous whimsy and therefore vastly superior.

masculine energy this feminine energy that. well i’m out of energy

need me some of this "renewable energy" I keep hearing about

*packing my suitcase for a 3 day trip* hm, but what if I need my terracotta warriors..

Too much movement makes your joints hurt and too little movement also makes your joints hurt. This would imply that there's an optimal amount of movement that allows your joints to not hurt. This is a lie.

Don't use Gemini or ChatGPT just use me, I can give you misinformation and I'll do a little dance

"You’re so polite" thanks i was raised in constant fear of upsetting people.

all video games should be dressup games. if you can't put your guy in a little outfit what's the point

baby girl I don't know what that acronym means. it would be so sexy of you to write out that piece of media's name in its entirety. Just the one time for momma please.

having friends is important because otherwise you’ll stay convinced your parents are normal

having friends is important because otherwise you’ll stay convinced your parents are normal