not to sound like a spartan but sex as a bonding ritual between two male friends is so underrated

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not to sound like a spartan but sex as a bonding ritual between two male friends is so underrated

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today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring
Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?
we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation
So after extensive interrogation I have an update:
my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.
the truth is actually weirder
she’s aware dandelions look like this
she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions
she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?
she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.
gosh I enjoy this website
For comparison, this is a daffodil
See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.
i don’t think so? i’m southern and buttercups are what we call these things (much tinier)
Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???
This is an Easter Lily. It is an actual lily and therefore deadly to cats.
They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!
This is a marigold:
….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u
But. But these are daffodils…….?
I AM GOING TO SHOVE DAISIES DOWN YOUR THROAT UNTIL THEY SPROUT OUT YOUR TOENAILS
im not american, can someone explain what he did?
Reagan was elected in 1980, around the same time that HIV began spreading and turning into a pandemic. Nearly 60,000 cases were reported with more than 27,000 dead before he even mentioned the disease in a major speech, during his second term.
His administration spent years pushing back on requests for funding for treatment and research. It’s impossible to know for certain, but if the disease had been aggressively studied and treated in the early years it might have been contained to a few hundred or few thousand deaths here in the USA.
Also he cut funds for mental health treatment and facilities, turning disabled people out onto the streets, the War on Drugs was cranked up to inner-city warfare, and the fundamentalist Christian “Moral Majority” that was his power base happily watched queers and black people and sex workers and homeless people die alone and scared.
Until Donald Trump was elected, he was the best example of an oblivious wealthy white person riding a wave of bigotry into the White House, and empowering that bigotry to a degree that cost tens of thousands of lives.
TL;DR, he watched us die and didn’t care.
Your yearly reminder that Ronald Reagan’s grave is a gender neutral bathroom.
the guy in the audience SNAPPED
i love this, video
hello, world (a test of some virtual singer software!)
(soundcloud)
Bitch, the VIBRATO! Go off sis
this slaps

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hoooo
BITCH
yeayus
Eew I hate how relatable this shit is
(x)
PEGGING RIGHTS.
Was about to fall asleep and apropos of nothing was struck out of nowhere by a horrible future vision of a brightly-lit and saccharine 3D-AI Calvin and Hobbes movie with Scarlet Johanssen voicing the mom and Chris Pratt voicing Hobbes and experienced an emotional haptic jerk so chilling I feel like I just foresaw my own death
(Drenched in a cold sweat, visibly shaking) We Need To Warn Bill Watterson
No, we don't.
He knows.
He has always known.
Actual quote:
"I don't want some animation studio giving Hobbes an actor's voice, and I don't want some greeting card company using Calvin to wish people a happy anniversary, and I don't want the issue of Hobbes's reality settled by a doll manufacturer. When everything fun and magical is turned into something for sale, the strip's world is diminished. 'Calvin and Hobbes' was designed to be a comic strip and that's all I want it to be. It's the one place where everything works the way I intend it to"
This was in the 1990's, pre-AI, pre- Chris Pratt, pre- Cinematic Universes, and if he was opposed to it then, he sure as hell wouldn't be okay with it now.
I think he probably experienced the same nightmare dystopian vision of the future you saw, but fortunately he had it like 40 years earlier.
oh thank heavens

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Miguel Ángel Silvestre
We really do need to bring back the word "trolling" and warning ppl not to feed the trolls
That TikTok of ppl pouring tomato sauce directly on the counter, adding spaghetti & mixing it with their hands while commenting how great of an idea it is? Yeah, we used to call that trolling, it's pathetic & bc all they want from it is attention, the best thing is not to give them any. Block & move on.
I keep seeing it on here too. Someone comments something outrageous on a post & gets dozens of ppl to respond, filling the entire comment section & making it unusable. And on Instagram, a comment saying "I hate colors" on a post of someone showing off colorful art gets 100 replies while positive comments get none. Congrats, you've fed the troll. Now stop doing it.
Trolling used to get you banned from forums. Now they call you an influencer and give you brand deals & ad revenue. That's why it's more important than ever not to feed the trolls, especially in spaces where any attention is good attention and getting yelled at by 10k ppl in the comments counts as "engagement", boosting your troll post in the algorithm.
I get such a kick out of the prefix 'cis'
getting a book cislated: yup, still can't read it
cisition timeline: just a selfie
cisformation: make a bunch of super saiyan sounds and walk away
cisubstantiation: by the power of god this bread has remained bread
idk its just neat
cisformers: they're just cars

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Holy shit guys I just duck duck went Moby Dick and THE LOGO TURNED INTO AN UNHOLY HYBRID BETWEEN A DUCK AND A WHITE WHALE????
I can't get over DuckDuckWent as a past tense of using duckduckgo as a verb. Like yes youre right BUT
Fun fact! If you duck duck went vocaloids, they have icons too
holy fuck there's more of them?
They also do it when you search Linux