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izzy's playlists!
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EXPECTATIONS
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@bluebeardtheblasphemous
Iâm Nora, your Emotional Support Alt Mom.
Minors DNI | Eat Your Vegetables | Save Your Money | Make Good Choices
At some point, I was writing fanfiction.
At this point, Iâm probably reading yours.
Make good choices, donât disappoint me, and leave nice comments from time to time.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Look, I love all my mutuals equally. But the ones a decade younger than me have a special place in my heart. And not in a weird way, I promise. Like in a âI see you as a future adult.â No. Wait. I swear itâs still not weird. Itâs like⌠how do I put this?
Look, the only time I ever got blackout drunk was at a wedding I was in and I spent the entire time while blackout lecturing the junior bridesmaid on how she needed to start saving 10% of her allowance and investing it in an IRA Roth. I have no memory of this. But I can tell you I lectured her brother of the same thing when he turned 16. I have a reputation for this now.
Every kid I work with or am responsible for in the moment is someone who has a bright future ahead.
I was also an idiot when I was their/your age and I just want to want you to make good choices, dammit.
i was also thinking about how sensual the snow was, how suggestive the curves of the snowbanks appeared, their softness
would you stop being a coward and fuck the snow bank please
âIf he knows 1000, itâs funny. If knows 1, itâs even funnierâ fucking killed me
*this meeting could have been an email voice* this cgi could have been a puppet
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
this girl was showing all the signs of being a secret mermaid so i pushed her into the pool and she turned into a forty foot long mosasaurus which is tbh way cooler
not really sure how to get her out though
for those of you asking why i pushed her into the pool in the first place: i work for a duplicitous small town aquarium and i'm trying to kidnap mermaids to jump through hoops and shit to entertain tourists and make money. fucking obviously. now that i know she's actually a mosasaurus though i Have fallen in pure-hearted love with her
This is a literal sexual harassment training video we had to complete
i assumed this was porn
Law & Order: SVU
Created by: Dick Wolf
Co-Produced by: Speed Weed
Studying the hundred years war so I can study the war of the roses so I can read Shakespeare so I can read Macchiavelli so I can study the 30 Years War so I can appreciate Rembrandt so I can understand the rise of colonialism as a means of European hegemony so I can read Victor Hugo so I can read Marx so I can read Edward Said so I can read Dune so I can read Fevre Dream so I can read ASOIAF so I can write au fanfiction on the internet
THIS IS THE WAY
i drew this for an art collab with friends on tiktok :D i dont think i want to draw hands for a while after this đ
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
itâs so hard for me to listen to heartbroken/angry breakup songs by straight men bc no matter how good the song is iâll be like iâm not sure if i fully believe you. letâs hear her side of the story.
I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby
English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son
I explained the âx before gta6â meme to my immigrant father and he, in turn, explained to me how back in his day in Romania, they had the same type of joke, except instead of it being gta6, it was about the imminent death of a singer named GicÄ Petrescu, who everyone was continuously shocked by because he refused to die. Every time a momentous event happened people would say, in essence: âThis happened and GicÄ Petrescu hasnât even died yet?!?â
So. He understood the gta6 meme immediately because they apparently had the same thing in Romania when he was young, except way, way more morbid
OP are you telling me we got the death of GicÄ Petrescu before we got gta6
During a high speed car chase pursuit, the FOX 11 Los Angeles helicopter had an unexpected moment when they spotted a rooster and a chicken casually walking down the sidewalk right in the middle of the pursuit.
The fact that they were walking 1-3mph
His joy and whimsy at seeing this
His acknowledgement of it not being as interesting as the chase
His little "huh" cuz you know they told him to focus
TIL âYankee Doodleâ was written by the British to mock americans. âDoodleâ is thought to come from the German âdĂśdelâ, meaning âfoolâ or âsimpletonâ and âmacaroni,â a flamboyantly stylish type of dress, painting the Yankees as morons who thought placing a feather in oneâs cap made them a âdandy.â
via reddit.com
so youâre telling me that âstuck a feather in his hat and called it macaroniâ would be like saying âwrote a G on his belt and called it gucciâ
thatâsâŚa pretty good analogy actually
US moron came to town
Hunting for some coochie
Wrote a G up on his belt
And this bitch called it Gucci
Seeing my notifications get flooded with this every July 4th is the only thing I respect about America
i stole this from twitter
To all my mutuals whether we talk much or not I love you all
@bluebeardtheblasphemous @steph-speaks
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
REBLOG IF IT'S OKAY FOR ME TO BOTHER YOU IF YOU'RE MY MUTUAL
you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you donât kill yourself
