lentil soup appreciator

hmm... *gets in evil bed and holds my evil stuffed animal* evil night.. *turns off my fucked up evil lamp*

my relationship with dragon age as a series is so twisted it’s like my ex-husband i divorced in the messiest way possible but i still have feelings for him nobody knows me like he does and we have occasional passionate love affairs still but also i daydream about killing him in his sleep quite often

hes lying next to me in bed my hands are shaking closing around his throat i cant see through the tears

it has always been a dream of mine to relax

it’s just not possible

now that the world cup is out of the way can we focus on me instead

Marylanders don’t say hi hello how are you my name is they just try to kill you with their car. which is of course a great honor in their culture

I believe authors should be cryptic and unhelpful in the interpretation of their own work or even act like they’re dead and never comment on it ever

What are you reading rn, why are you reading it, and what format are you reading it in (physical book, ereader, on your phone etc)

i’m like a clown that no one hired or pays