Local Biromantic Wizard @birowizard - Tumblr Blog

Dude its so funny giving level 1 adventurers quests they just do anything. Like yeah grab 3 frogs for me. And also some taco bell on the way for me. Uh huh, heres 1 copper for your troubles.

#wizardposting

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professionalchaoticdumbass

WIZARD WRAPPED

You casted 1,039,627 spells this year

You pondered your orb for 985 hours

You targeted 109 spells at someone other than yourself - that’s in the top 6% of wizards!

You gained 5 familiars

Your favorite focus for spellcasting this year was a staff

Your cup size is H

Your most cast spell was Spontaneous Snack Generation and you used it 576 times this year.

Your most summoned object was Ketamine Ape at 69 summons

You trapped someone within an amulet for 10,000 years

You were unwittingly haunted by the evil skull twice

He/him but only when Im wizardposting

#wizardposting #does this make sense

You transmutate into a cat ONE TIME and then everyone in the tower starts calling you kitten….fml

#wizardposting

No one tells you how much you get made fun of as the wizard of the party. SORRY I dont have proficiency in armor and only have 11 AC 😒 god forbid someone not be combat focused

#wizardposting #d&d

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cimicherrychanga

what is the FUCKING POINT then???

#im not called biromantic wizard for nothin

People just let their familliars do anything nowadays I stg. Tell me why I just saw someone let their cat familiar chase around another students mouse familiar

#wizardposting

fictional-authority

birowizard

this potion got me fucked up what do you MEAN stir counter clockwise five times then stir clockwise three times WHILE ALSO ADDING MF DRAGONS FIRE 😭😭😭

sewi-li-suwi

i swear this is equivilant to stirring 2 times anticlockwise. let me try.

sewi-li-suwi

hospital.

mortthewizard

What would you do if I arrived at the function in this fit:

(and nothing else)

birowizard

Heh….well lets just say that "griffins" wouldnt be called "griffins" anymore…

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birowizard

Does anyone know any good places to buy Eye of Newt I'm boycotting Wizazon :/

pluto-the-accursed

My Sibling in The Powers That Be, THERE ARE NEWTS OUTSIDE

birowizard

I'm sick with the plague I literally cannot go outside…not everyone is fortunate enough to have access to healing potions :/

#wizardposting #im sick of these priviledged nepo baby apprentices man

this potion got me fucked up what do you MEAN stir counter clockwise five times then stir clockwise three times WHILE ALSO ADDING MF DRAGONS FIRE 😭😭😭

#wizardposting #i've accidentally turned the other apprentices into stone 3 times cause of this shit fml

Its always "how many spells did you write in your grimoire" or "have you memorized any of the magical runes" and never "wow great job Pondering The Orb" or "was Pondering The Orb fun"

#wizardposting #being a wizards apprentice is rough guys

TW // dark sorcerer

I'm literally fucking shaking rn he took everything he even took my last eye of newt

#wizardposting #copypasta

Caught the plague so I'm stuck in my tower…ugh.

#wizardposting

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Does anyone know any good places to buy Eye of Newt I'm boycotting Wizazon :/

#wizardposting

She took the orb in the divorce.

#wizardposting

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