Pluto

I'm A Wizd

Wiz Reed

Wazam

It's ok, take your time

Spells

Babe just look at your username

wemail!!!

wemail c:

I cannot fucking believe I am drunk, past midnight, and tumblr is throwing fucking saturated fatty-acids at me

Listen here friendo I didn’t sit through a year of organic chemistry for you to come into my house and call a carboxylic acid a saturated fatty acid you respect that hexadecanoic acid

And I didnt get a degree in biochemistry to hear you say that carboxylic acids with aliphatic chains arent fatty acids. That hexadecanoic acid IS a saturated fatty acid!

A wizard that exists in a paradoxical state of having never fucked and being one who fucks.

I’m often asked “is it legal to eat stars?” The answer is yes, if you are big enough. Next time please check my FAQ page first 🙄

If a fantasy world has an ancient tree of wisdom, that means it must also have young trees that are dumb as shit. Just giving terrible advice like, "the evil wizard is kinda hot"'

okay. rude.

I have never reblogged something so fast in my life

it’s exactly what you think it is

it’s exactly what I thought it was.

inside your body is PITCH BLACK your cells do all of that in the DARK

We outta light bulbs

I heard this out as "When criticizing something, you must judge it for what it is, not what it isn't"

#this is why so many of us urge people to get a wider diet of stories

@cryptidjack

Look, if the new magic didn't have a personality construct that kept trying to tell me which spells to use, maybe I wouldn't still be using the old magic.

Yes it had a deep blood cost, but at least it was a one time sacrifice and not this monthly bloodletting nonsense new age magic has

[Image Description: artwork depicting a Noivern-a pokémon resembling a wyvern crossed with a bat-crouched atop a tree branch, illuminated by a flashlight beam. End image description.]

dead tired today so I grabbed a coffee from the gas station & the guy greeted me by trying to say “is that everything “ but fumbled and said “e ga thebythin” and me trying to say “yeah” or “yup” just went “YIP!” in response. No survivors

Hey @wizard-council-museum-clerk i have a painting for your exhibit

Beautiful! I'll mark it for display in gallery 78-S (Portraits of the Undead) immediately!

*muffled screaming*

So, is pondering necessary for the magical arts, or is it just because it’s shiny. Im going to do it either way, i just want to know if I should be expecting something to happen.

If you’ve never stayed up pondering an orb, getting lost surfing within infinite arcane knowledge of various topics, had the magic overheat and stutter because you had too many rabbit-holes open, then looked up at your grandfather clock and realized 200 years passed on by like it was nothing, could you even call yourself a wizard?

Lava lamps while ponderable, generally aren't enchanted enough for serious pondering. But some wizards enchant the strangest stuff.