bingo bongo

if eating three balanced meals a day at regular times makes you gain weight then maybe you were meant to gain weight

"i ate too many cookies" is truly an ageless problem. an unlearnable lesson.

it's actually sick you get tired of eating the same food over and over when some animals they just eat grass all day mind you. just another pointless challenge mechanic added in by big universe to get you to go to the grocery store

Was literally thinking about this when I gave the rabbits their breakfast, the same dry pellets they get twice a day every day, and they were so hyped for it, as they always are. Why can't I have that where are my pellets #mypellets

at the grocery store i bought 2 limes and a lemon and the checker said to me "two limes and a lemon... Anything could happen"

they should rewrite the bible so that jesus would be a hot 5'2 girl with a creampie fetish from missouri

so i put my hands up theyre playing my song the evil skull flies away

sorry for not answering messages for three thousand years i have. Stew. in place of a brain. you know how it is

ive never wanted to send a death threat over a game before

tautological wordle answer

posts that make you open wordle

Oh boy better go try today’s wordle

WHAT THE FUCK

asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.

when everything feels like the movies you bleed just to know youre alive. or so ive heard.

do you think the pieces from chess are all actually mad at each other or are they just like actors