Fagnus the Red

"blowing your load" and "cumming your brains out" are both really good, so you'd think "blowing your brains out" would be fantastic, but,

EVERYONE STOP TELLING ME HOW OLD YOU WERE IN 2008 I DONT WANNA HEAR THAT SHIT

SOME OF YOU SHOULD BE AT THE OPRHANGE

preschool. I meant preschool.

okay i’m done being a bitch

is what my IMPOSTER would say. don’t fall for it

just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.

i think if you showed minecraft or fortnite to a little medieval peasant boy he would probably start writing parodies of church hymns. it’s human nature

they're putting in an extra wide sidewalk so polycules of 16 can walk side-by-side slow as fuck & block the whole thing when im in a hurry

when you're the 17th member of the polycule and you have to walk in the road and get hit by cars all the time

repeat after me: i am a sexy bitch and no one ruins my 2014

I am a sexy bitch and no one ruins my 2014

2014 a am and bitch I my no one ruins sexy

Official joy and whimsy post