ummm was OP on strawberries when they posted this? lol

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ummm was OP on strawberries when they posted this? lol

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convo i had with the hubster this morning before i even had coffee
him: so i was talking to someone about fanfiction the other day
me: oh yeah?
him: and all i knew was like, snippets from what you’ve told me
him: i was like a kid on a pirate ship
him: like, “that’s a mast! i’ve heard of sails! i know what shipping is”
me: sounds like fun
him: and the thing with eggs
me: what?
him: isn’t there a thing in fanfiction with eggs?
me: ….uh?
him: isn’t there a thing in fanfiction where people grow from eggs?
me: what?
me: i mean, trolls grow from eggs? in homestuck. i may have mentioned that? but that’s canon-specific, not a fanfiction genre or trope or whatever
him: there’s not fanfiction about egg people?
me: not…not that i know of????
FIVE MINUTES LATER
me: i can’t stop thinking over the egg thing
him: what egg thing
me: the egg - what you said about fanfiction and egg people
me: i can’t think of what we talked about that made you think that there was a fic genre where humans grow from eggs
him: oh! right. i could have sworn you said something about guys putting eggs in other guys
me: OH MY GOD. are you talking about oviposition????
him: is that when guys have eggs in them?
me: how did this even come up? who were you even talking to?
him: this girl i work with and i were talking about deep space nine and she was talking about shipping these two guys
him: and i wanted to be all hip and show i knew what she was talking about so i was like “do you know about the eggs”
me: OH MY GOD
me: babe NO
me: that’s like — a niche fetish thing!!! you asked her if she was into male pregnancy porn?????
him: isn’t that - isn’t that what slash is?
me: NO
him: i guess i learn something new every day
thinking about diatoms again
microscopic living stars made of glass that eat the sun. and they're all around us. in every body of water. glass sun-eating stars.
I like them a lot. they produce up to half of all earth's oxygen. the air you breathe is thanks to sun-eating stars made of glass. and that's pretty cool.
and you know. like oblongs and triangles and some other bullshit
[Image Description: A photograph of a filled circle of diatoms of a black background. The diatoms themselves look like glass beads in various shades and patterns of white and blue, their shades ranging from round to squiggly to stars to triangles and beyond. /End description]
I felt like you guys will appreciate this
Edinburgh, day 4 - National gallery

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Rough skinned newt (Taricha granulosa) from this morning
do you think the vengeful spirits of eight american monkeys that blew up in space ever haunt everyone who's obsessed with laika. because i would if i didn't get even one shitty poem
sorry my stance on stories w no homophobia is just um. well it could do w a little homophobia if im being honest
every political scandal has to be called ____gate now because 54 years ago a guy named blowjob told reporters there were bugs in the democrat offices
love getting a queer clothing ad and they're selling booty shorts that say "this pussy's nonbinary too" and a jockstrap that says "faggot" all over it. so like. can a penis be nonbinary or.......
out of curiosity I looked through their entire (very large) collection of booty shorts and there was a lot of "faggot" and "alpha male" and "he him hole" and a lot of pussy puns... but don't worry! they didn't forget trans women transgirls! 😃
a trans woman cannot embody or own her desirability. it can only be granted to her by others
sex positivity is for cis women, it's for "faggots," it's for trans men, and it's for nonbinary people if they're TME, but it's not for trans women. sexual liberation is for other people. we must let others sexualize us, but we can never sexualize ourselves. you know I think there's a word for this I've heard somewhere.... something like "lisogyny"?

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im completely addicted to Open Link in New Tab
if Open Link in New Tab is wrong then baby i dont want to be right
I'm very very glad that my knee-jerk, gut-feeling, primal-instinct reaction to seeing a Default Influencer is embarrassment. I think this saves me from a lot of bullshit.
Some lip-filler lady on enough Ozempic to euthanize a horse: "The sad truth is an elite lifestyle takes money and discipline. Buy these brands on credit if you have to. Skip meals."
Me: "Oh. Oh I'm physically experiencing the effects of secondhand embarrassment. You live like this? This is your life? Your interiority? If I was anything like this I'd kill myself I think."
To be clear ☝️, absolutely not gender-exclusive. Some broccoli-haired shirtless 23-year-old man on enough trenbolone to euthanize a different horse starts talking about how to be a high-value male and I start thinking instantly about how I'd have 4,000 slugs use me as a jungle-gym before I'd want this man within cootie-contagion distance of me.
Respect for my soldiers… she’s saving him… the hons…
I miss them…
their gone….
Perhaps the funniest thing about reading Gideon the Ninth for the first time was, for me, you start it up and you're like: Wow these guys are in a weird fucking bone cult. They're on like fantasy Pluto and they're obsessed with bones.
And then you get used to them. You go yeah they're obsessed with bones but it's like literally normal. Every culture can have things that seem strange, even unsettling to outsiders, but is actually totally benign, and here's it's bones. It's literally superficial. People die and they reuse their skeletons and it's just recycling.
And then you get to Canaan House and you realise. No one else in this world is like this. It's literally just them.
And to the other Houses you're like, guys, chill. They're literally just wearing skull make-up, stop being rude.
And then casually like 3/4s through the book Gideon casually mentions that everyone in the Ninth house bathes using soap made from human flesh and you go. Ah.
Many of you may be asking- what is rap? Well, to put it simply, rap is the part of the Gorillaz song that sounds- a little different.

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Fish-shaped interlocking paving stones.