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@basementpotato

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where's that post of someone getting a letter from their bank like "dear keith we realise you're just taking the piss but every time you venmo your mate for 'al-qaeda training camp' we do have to, by law, fill out a lot of boring paperwork for the police so we'd really appreciate it if you'd stop doing that"
here it is
#you know that post from the guy who worked on DS9#who ended up alone on one of the sets once#and for one second felt like he was really on DS9#this is the dark version of that
#mom threw them in the oven with the cookies to roast
remake of this classic

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prayer to whichever dead catholic person is most appropriate: may I not have to run a whole week of surprise camps on crutches. in a knee brace.
Im agnostic raised liberal protestant, but absolutely the catholics got saints right. Sometimes your problem is so fucking specific you need Some Guy. If you're listening, Guy of Workers Who Have Strain Injuries,
No fucking WAY, there's actually a knee injury Guy? Catholicism accidentally reinventing the medical specialty system......
I know you're wondering: are there slutty pictures of him revealing his knees?
Saint Roch, by Francesco Ribalta, c. 1625, Museo de Bellas Artes, Valencia
[image id: st. Roch staring soulfully and hiking up his robe to show that his thigh has a bubo on it, also sluttily revealing his knees]
what the dog doin
thinking about when my friend found a book from the 70s in a church office with truly some of the most insane prayers I have ever heard
oh this was about someone specific
ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys
excuse me
Sorry op. That's my friend the Salt Vampire from the Star Trek episode "The Man Trap" which first aired in 1966. Blessings be upon you.
its just i dont feel blessed by its presence is all. sending love your way
"The conman who's lying to and underpaying his 14-year-old employee is the moral compass of the whole series" makes it sound like Mob Psycho 100 is so universally filled with amoral characters that a conman ranks as the most ethical.
This is not true. Mob Psycho 100 is full of many moral characters. It's just that the conman who's lying to his 14-year-old employee is such a unique and brand-new type of fictional guy that he achieves being a liar and a conman and a moral compass all at the same time with absolute consistency and zero contradiction.
This fanfic shit is hard bro I was sweating screaming crying while writing this
Edit: There is now a fanfic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/83024906/chapters/218626661

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πππ
"This 14-year-old is the most powerful person in the WORLD but really... he just wants to be a normal middle schooler...!" is absolutely not new to anime but USUALLY it's all a power-fantasy. It's humble-bragging. It's an awkward marriage of relatability and bus-window-day-dreaming. "Oh MAN, I just SAVED the WORLD π±πππ₯but I still have a MATH TEST tomorrow πβοΈAND I have a CRUSH π (who doesn't know I'm the coolest badass in the world because that's a secret!! π)"
Which is all to say once again that no one is doing it like Mob Psycho 100. Because Mob is unambiguously the most powerful entity in the world and he goes "Okay but that's not very interesting. Being powerful isn't a personality. I'm gonna try to improve myself in ways that matter."
The evil spirit on his shoulder spends all series going "PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!" and Mob says, "No thank you. Do you want to help me with my math homework?" and the second most powerful person in the world comes up to say, "We are a supreme species of super-human better than everyone else!" and Mob says, "You sound stunted as a person. Maybe try working a customer service job?" and a classmate will go, "Why not use your powers to be popular?" and Mob says, "Psychic powers don't make you popular. Do you want to see me lift this 10kg dumbbell? I've been working on that."
i hate living in seasoning city

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random but here is a recipe for cold peanut noodles that you can make during hot weather because i just ate this and had a fantastic time
2tbsp of peanut butter. a splash of rice vinegar, soy sauce, sesame oil, maple syrup. some chili flakes, some sesame seeds. a splash of water to thin it out. now you put in your noodles (cooled!!!! boiled and rinsed so theyβre cold!!) and then some chopped up cucumber or carrot or avocado or cabbage or any crunchy vegetable. i just used cucumber
you can also put in lime juice or herbs or sriracha or grated garlic/ginger or anything like that; tofu/tempe/meat for more protein etc. noodle wise this can be ramen soba udon whatever, i used soba. enjoy homies
BTS Accepts the Award for Song of the Summer for "SWIM"