does the body ALWAYS have to keep the score? maybe we could just have a friendly game this time. maybe we can just have fun without putting numbers on it

Janaina Medeiros
Sade Olutola
we're not kids anymore.
sheepfilms
dirt enthusiast
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AnasAbdin

Andulka
d e v o n
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

Product Placement
YOU ARE THE REASON

occasionally subtle
Peter Solarz

PR's Tumblrdome
trying on a metaphor
Three Goblin Art
KIROKAZE
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@balsambay
does the body ALWAYS have to keep the score? maybe we could just have a friendly game this time. maybe we can just have fun without putting numbers on it

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Sorry I'm going to have to cancel. No I can't reschedule. Yes I'm a scared child forever now. No it's definitely permanent.
Recent global popularity of social media content about dissociative identity disorder (DID) has coincided with increased self-diagnosis amon
— Raymond M. Douglas, On Being Raped
Dead girls dry each other's eyes and pretend for a while that we're still alive. It's a very cold and dark night which never seems to end, but you can do it.

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“DID” stands for “doll in doll” because you get more doll per doll
(pov i am your coworker and you are having a casual conversation with me) you know, that reminds me of something that hurts so much to remember that i actually can’t even mention it at all
What makes you think you'd be a good fit for this position? // Based on journal entries.
Text transcript below.
did perfectionism ever truly protect you from harm or neglect as a child though. ultimately. Lol
[REALLY NORMAL AND WELL-ADJUSTED VOICE] well you never know maybe it COULD have saved me. if i ever actually achieved perfection. it could have happened then. if i was actually ever enough. Which i was not
return to silent hill was so bad our theater was giggling from it. actually incredible how many bad decisions went into this movie that the $3 wig budget doesn’t even make the top 10.
folding in laura and angela’s storylines into mary’s was…a move. but then i was like ok wait we might be starting to cook here. simmering perhaps.
“I saw these monsters. I saw them tear her apart. How long?”
“Since I was a girl.”
“Why would your father do this to you?”
“I don't know. I never had a choice. / You think I’m disgusting.”
then the abstract daddy scene where james crawls to embrace mary’s face as a rejection of that. i was twitching and insane about it and feeling like maybe this is, despite all odds, making it to 3 stars on letterboxd for this alone.
and then of course it was all downhill again from there and comically bad. 1.5 stars best enjoyed in a theater of strangers who are just as baffled and incredulous as you are about this whole thing.

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Iphigenia at Aulis, Yves Olade.
Stephanie Foo, What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma
(no beers in) do you guys think i'm redeemable
my therapy journey with DID so far, visualized

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some part keeps telling our partner that they think my father knew about the abuse, or worse, was complicit and i don’t know what to do about it. i wish they would stop saying these things if they don’t know for sure. i don’t particularly like him but i don’t want to have that known if it isn’t true.
sometimes i feel bad because it’s like he still thinks we have a good relationship when, to me, it’s like we’re strangers. i get nauseous when i have to talk to him. but maybe i’m just overreacting :)
you can never go back. this is your one life. you had a bad childhood and that's it. you lost your teen years to mental illness and that's it. you're miserable in your 20s and that's it. you just go forward