our lady of labyrinths

Q1: How would you describe yourself?

A: Practically or metaphorically?

Whichever feels more natural to you. 

A: A woven tapestry still on the loom. Threads of silk and cobwebs in the corners. Bugmeal and rice wine. A woman afraid of her own shadow. Um, someone that tries to be gentle. It doesn’t come naturally to me, though.

B: A fallow field. An obsessive list-maker and Monday-morning philosopher. A tide pool. Someone that crosses things through. I make a lot of mistakes, but I also just like the finality of it, you know? Oh! A lover. I think that’s a good one.

C: An infrequent occasion. An ordinary kind of shadow. I’m still learning. I haven’t really thought about it too much.

D: I was a girl, once. 

E: A little girl!

F: The first scream.

G: A phylactery of light. Grief made form. An open door. The end of sorrow. 

Q2: What do you dream about?

A: I don’t remember my dreams. No, wait. Last week I dreamt of the river where I grew up as a girl. I think about it a lot. It was a bit dirty, but I loved it. I always felt it was important to be next to the water, to be able to see and smell it. [Laughs]. No, of course I never went in. It wasn’t to be touched. 

B: The wind. The ocean. Stars, the world, all of it. In this world I am alone and I am free and I am still somehow loved.

C: I’m often writing, but I can’t read what it says. Silly, huh? 

D: Somewhere warm. A big tower with green dragons. A moat, too, but it’s just for pretend. Nothing scary’s gonna happen here.

E: Huh?

F: What do you care? [Several minutes pass.] Burning. I dream about burning. And–yeah. Burning. Fuck, let’s leave it at that. 

G: In my dreams, it’s always summer. It’s sunkissed and brilliant. Light and laughter spilled everywhere like honey. It’s a beautiful dream, isn’t it? You can take a piece of it with you, if you’d like. There’s plenty here for you, too. 

Q3: What’s your biggest fear?

Scratch that. Q3, revised: What would you say is your biggest strength?

A: I’m…wow, okay, this is embarrassing. No, I’m alright, sorry. I think I, you know, I try really hard. I’m dedicated. I’m trying really hard. [Laughs] I’m also a pretty good baker.

B: Well, people say I’m funny. I’m good at making connections. Uh, what else, what else. I’m perceptive. That’s always been really important. I know when I’ve fucked up. I clean up my messes. I’m independent. Am I talking too much about myself? What about you?

C: Helping, I guess. I’ve always been better at working out other people’s problems. I’m great at compartmentalizing. I don’t think I’m all that good at it, but I like to make things. Something just for me. 

D: I’m a good actress. 

E: Um, I try to be good. And nice, too. I’m not really good at making friends but I’d like to be.

F: Triage. Multitasking. Open-heart surgery. Being an asshole. Gravedigging. Take your pick.

G: Love. 

You seem a bit blasé. No, I don’t blame you, I know. Really. I know.