Baby Honey

they need to make a menstrual cup with a tap on the end. vampire fratboys should be able to do a keg stand off my vagina.

i'm like a fujoshi but for dead people

People on Tumblr love sharing information about themselves no matter how asinine it is. And I'm the same way. Everybody tell me what the last thing you drank was.

effedupmovies.com/careers/

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

affirmations they will not kill me at work today. it is not in my job description to get killed. if they did kill me at work that would be weird and probably not worth it for them

the version of you from five years ago would be genuinely amazed by what you’ve handled since then. sit with that for a second

young old person tip for you all. go get some photos printed (pauses so someone can say bogos binted) and fill out a physical album

and annotate them with who is in the photos and when and where the photos were taken!!! your extended family 50 years from now will be grateful, and so will you if you end up forgetting any details

(sprints into room late, looking harried and frantic as fuck) bogos binted. did I miss it

First test flight of a flying car by Mazda partially a success

I feel like the Arizona license plate should take some place in our analysis of whatever in the goddam fuck we’re looking at here

google used to know what i was talking about

it does feel good as fuck to walk around in underwear only.

you guys do realise walking doesn't actually move you anywhere right? it just destroys you entirely and places a perfect copy of you right in front of where you were standing

i bet it feels good as fuck to intend to do something and then actually do it