mccoy spies on spock and finds out the iconic hair is actually a helmet
omg
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mccoy spies on spock and finds out the iconic hair is actually a helmet
omg

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data really hits right in the autism because he doesn’t intrinsically understand interactions and social cues and often thinks differently than others, but wants to be loved by the people he loves. spock really hits right in the autism because he learned to suppress his feelings in order to not be shamed for them and then spent much of his adult life struggling to get back to being able to fully feel emotions and allow himself to make connections with the people he loves.
Bashir hits right in the autism because he spends half the show badly masking and he does classic Gifted Kid Self-Sabotage and his parents sent him to Space ABA and he’s justifiably still mad about it. Seven hits right in the autism, because she’s Doing Her Best, but she really can’t express how few fucks she gives about a lot of the supposedly-intrinsic-to-being-a-human behaviours she’s supposed to be learning, and the crew member she vibes with the most is the Vulcan.
Tuvok hits right in the autism because he spends most of his time interacting with people who Do Not Get Him and want him to be more like them but he has to suppress his frustration about it and just deal because there’s no way off the ride.
deanna troi hits right in the autism bc she fundamentally processes sensory and emotional information differently from the rest of the crew and socialises differently, a fact which everyone seamlessly respects and is supportive of
Sarek, adopting another infant: This one’s first word will be Mother, I am certain of it
Child: M…m…m…
Sarek: Yes, my child?
Child: Mutiny!
Sarek: Alas.
Most people chose: “Kiss him back".
What they should do next.
“Go back to the room, you two!”
“I am looking respectfully” (I don’t mind them staying there 😌😌".
Choose what I should draw last :)
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Jadzia Dax
tumblr’s collective composure was hanging on by a single fucking thread and it was supernatural of all things that got out the scissors
is anyone surprised
do they still do it? does the supernatural fandom still have gif to offer in this trying times?
SPN Fandom! Do you still have a gif to offer us?
I shall chant.
Supernatural
Supernatural
Supernatural
Ask and you shall receive
Supernatural gif!! The prodigal son returns!!!
This fuckin slapped me in the face
Me: OK time for bed.
My brain:
Wet Moon, homestuck shoes, vote count slow as Trump sues, Georgia Swinging to and fro, Nevada counts have far to go, Youtube Johnlock video curse, Fic Deep State Omegaverse, Halloween Full Moon is blue, UK kickstarts lockdown 2, Putin resignation lies, here’s to Sherlock season 5, Destiel canon, Cas is gay, Covid rising by the day, uk Tories starve the kids, next a mishapocalypse, we didn’t start the fire
🎶 Fly me to the moon 🎶

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AOS Spirk Fanfic Rec List
Key
– ☆ means I really liked it
– ☆☆ means I loved it
– ✇ means it’s crack and/or hilarious
– ¢ means it’s cheesy or cliché (but in a good way)
the master list with the TOS & AU links is here
Armchair Psychology
by bigmamag
Words: 3,548
Summary: McCoy forces Kirk and Spock to write an ongoing list of things they like about each other. Kirk doesn’t know if he’ll be able to make his weekly quota. At least, not at first.
Comments: Spock and Jim realize that they don’t actually know one another and, as it turns out, happen have common interests.
Daybreak
by museaway
their tumblr
Words: 2,309
Summary: Spock would have preferred to remain on board while the other senior officers took shore leave, but Jim had insisted he accompany them.
Comments: sweet. Spocko and Jimbo dance together.
☆☆ Please don’t touch the Vulcans
by museaway
their tumblr
Words: 17,690
Summary: The “yes” is out of Jim’s mouth before he can think about it.
Comments: soo good. Jim agrees to join Spock on new Vulcan (essentially, for Christmas). slow build. tarsus IV reference.
☆ The Walls Between Us
by museaway
their tumblr
Words: 12,898
Summary: They have been imprisoned for thirteen hours, ten minutes, and forty-two standard seconds.
Comments: 3 cheers for mind melds, genius Jim, angst and hurt/comfort!
Universal Translator Fail
by janice_lester
Words: ~7,000
Summary: There’s a lot we don’t know about how the Universal Translator works. This is a story about what it does when it isn’t workin’.
Comments: a 5+1 story
¢ Cumulative Evidence
by jaylee_g
their tumblr
Words: 5,660
Summary: “So maybe he wasn’t prone to self-denial naturally, but he was sure as hell certain he could learn it with time”… or Jim Kirk’s guide to discovering you’re attracted to men, or rather one half-human, half-vulcan male in particular.
Comments: Jim is attracted to Spock and not sure what to do about it
Chemical Compatibility
by jaylee_g
their tumblr
Words: 5,232
Summary: ksvalentine submission for this prompt… Carol had warned him once, in her kind-yet-succinct way, that he would one day meet someone who would be able to get under his skin. He wondered what she would say if he called her now and told her of his predicament… She would probably find the entire thing vastly amusing.
Comments: Jim doesn’t like Valentine’s day. also, hello porn!
Introvenient (Spock’s POV)
by jaylee_g
their tumblr
Words: 3,508
Summary: "He is your T’hy’la,” he responds, and you feel your heart beat faster than it ever has.
Comments: if you like this one, read its companion piece, Entire of Himself from Jim’s POV. The link for it is at the end.
☆ Illuminate
by jaylee_g
their tumblr
Words: 2,387
Summary: The universe he lived in really, truly sucked and he would have been content if he had lived blissfully on not knowing that…. not knowing that it could be better, not knowing other Jims had amazing lives with living fathers, soul deep friendships and a long list of battles won.
Comments: simple, meaningful, and sweet.
¢ Implicitly
by jaylee_g and sundara
jaylee_g’s tumblr
Words: 5,210
Summary: It had always been Spock; from the moment they met, it had been Spock.
Comments: pon farr. romance novel-ish.
Interpreting Spock
by jaylee_g
their tumblr
Words: 2,206
Summary: Written for the ever exuberant marlee813 using the prompt “either Spock or Jim getting sick (my preference is Spock) and the other having to take care of them” for my reading/reviewing challenge… “Bottom line: he knew his Spock, thus he knew, unequivocally, that Spock was sick (and being rather shifty about it).”
Comments: Spock is sick and won’t admit it. Jim helps.
☆ Of Lirpas and Laras (You say it best)
by jaylee_g
their tumblr
Words: 5,4688
Summary: ksadvent submission for the prompt: Spock has almost nothing of Vulcan. Kirk searches the universe for things to give him.
Comments: fluffy fluffy fluff
Missing Scene I
by lalazee
their tumblr
Words: 923
Summary: Following the death of someone special.
Comments: hurt/comfort. Into Darkness. Jim is in shock.
Nothing Else Matters
by alma_gloriosa
Words: 13,551
Summary: Nyota thinks Kirk is just vain. Spock isn’t as sure. When a new mission leads to strange behavior from the captain, Spock wants to know what’s going on, and how he can help - if Jim will let him.
Comments: hurt/comfort. aftereffects of Tarsus IV on Jim.
☆¢ once more (with feeling)
by juxtapose
their tumblr
Words: 7,114
Summary: Post-STID. Kirk and Spock are unsure about their relationship. Spock Prime decides it’s his final destiny to change that.
Comments: Spock Prime is dying.
Priorities
by jesse_kips
Words: 5,143
Summary: 5 times Spock put someone else before his own needs, and one time someone else put him first.
Comments: really cute. Spock gets a much needed confidence boost.
☆✇ Subtext
by noodleinabarrel
their tumblr
Words: 13,032
Summary: Texting your Vulcan first officer in the middle of the night is never a good idea. Especially when you have an obsessive crush on said Vulcan.
The holidays are approaching and Jim is left entirely Spockless aboard the Enterprise when his First takes shore leave on New Vulcan. After some midnight pining, Jim sends a text he instantly regrets. That is, until Spock responds and willingly continues their textual communications to an inevitable conclusion.
Comments: love this one lmao. Jim is pining over Spock. some of Spock’s responses to Jim’s texts made me snort laugh. this is part 1 of a 3 part series: Textual Communications
☆☆ The Morning After
by noodleinabarrel
their tumblr
Words: 50,381
Summary: Jim convinces Spock to take shore leave with him on Risa, hoping the time together will help re-solidify their bond of friendship after some recent tension. Meanwhile, Spock convinces himself he’s on Risa for one reason and one reason only, to prevent his wayward captain from getting into trouble. After a passionately illogical night of Romulan Ale and chocolate infused liquor, everything changes when Jim wakes with something other than a hangover filling his head. Something he’s sure neither he nor Spock can handle. Because if Jim knows anything for sure, it’s that his messed up thoughts belong nowhere near Spock’s clean, ordered mind.
Comments: angst and hurt/comfort. Tarsus IV. one of my faves!
¢ Under My Umbrella
by creampuffer
Words: 2,588
Summary: Five times Kirk needed an umbrella and the one time he didn’t.
Comments: 5+1 story. fluffy.
☆ Coming Home
by Amanda Warrington (awarrington on AO3)
Words: 126,159
Summary: Set a few months into their first mission, the Enterprise is ordered to pick up a Vulcan Healer and transport him to the new colony. Once there they are scheduled to remain and assist with the early stages of setting up the colony. Kirk’s liaison is his ‘old friend’ Ambassador Spock, now known as Elder Sepak, who takes the opportunity to help Kirk and Spock become better acquainted.
Comments: really good slow build fic!
so long as you don’t lose me
by raphaela667
Words: ~3,000
Summary: prompt: Five times Kirk fought for a woman and one time he fought for a man.
Comments: (it’s the 1st link) good 5+1 story.
☆ Anchor Me
by synia
Words: 16,394
Summary: Kirk is part Betazoid, he doesn’t advertise it because it doesn’t define him, but after feeling the terror and the psychic scream from the destruction of Vulcan he starts to break down. He can’t block anything anymore and it almost kills him. Spock intervenes. For this prompt at the st_xi_kink_meme.
Comments: Kirk suffering in silence. (dude, you don’t have to be alone. ask for heeelp Jim, damn.) hurt/comfort. Spock to the rescue
Sweetheart Come to Me
by rabidchild67
their tumblr
Words: 3,460
Summary: Endearments are illogical. Until they aren’t. Spock learns a lesson.
Comments: hurt/comfort and fluff.
☆¢ We Two Boys Together Clinging
by rabidchild67
their tumblr
Words: 21,812
Summary: One day, 9-yr old Jim Kirk wakes up in the middle of nowhere with a big headache and no memory of how he got there. He’s not sure where he is, but it’s definitely not Earth, and there’s not another living soul around. Well, except for this other kid - an actual Vulcan! - who’s annoying at first, but turns out to be pretty useful to have around. Guess it’s time for the adventure of a lifetime he’s always wanted.
Comments: hurt/comfort. Jim & Spock interact as kids
☆ Antigravity
by sinestrated
Words: 9,727
Summary: Five times Spock was surprised by the brilliance of Kirk’s mind, and one time he totally saw it coming.
Comments: I looove genius Kirk. and so does Spock ;)
☆ Pyromania
by sinestrated
Words: 9,689
Summary: Jim has been burning bridges since childhood. The Enterprise and Spock eventually change that.
Comments: hurt/comfort, tarsus fic, suicide attempt, Jim won’t stop pushing people away, happy ending.
☆✇ Take This Sinking Boat (And Point It Home)
by sinestrated
Words: 6,698
Summary: In which Spock pines, Jim isn’t stupid (except he kind of is), and Christopher Pike has had enough of this bullshit.
Comments: this isn’t crack, it’s just hilarious. Pike POV. fluffy, Spock & Jim being dense.
☆☆ Vulcans Are Fangirls Too
by jouissant
Words: 10,838
Summary: Kirk is a secret astrophysics genius who publishes under a pseudonym; Spock sends him fanmail. Shenanigans ensue. Less fluffy than the title might imply, but a feel-good story nonetheless.
Comments: I love Jim being his genius self. also: Spock is adorable
no place for cowards (or: jim kirk’s heart is a tender place)
by alienbabe
Words: 1,175
Summary: a girl tells him once “you don’t know how to love anyone, Jim Kirk,” and he starts to think that maybe she’s right
Comments: angst and happy endings
☆ Kings and Pawns of Men
by ragdoll987
Words: 11,248
Summary: A series of unusual and anonymous gifts sends Spock on a quest for answers (with Kirk along for the ride). How chess and strategy conspired to bring two men together in the midst of a Christmas holiday! Written for the K/S Advent Calendar 2010.
Comments: wonderfully sweet
☆ The Handmaid of Genius
by ladyblahblah
their tumblr
Words: 3,033
Summary: When the replicators go offline, Jim reacts unexpectedly.
Comments: Tarsus IV. Jim experiences panic and severe anxiety. hurt/comfort.
Through Blind Men’s Eyes
by ladyblahblah
their tumblr
Words: 45,929
Summary: The obligatory Pon Farr story … with a bit of a twist.
Comments: bodyswap.
Constant
by kyliselle
Words: 770
Summary: A fill for this prompt at st_xi_kink : I can’t get enough of SpockPrime calling Jim “James”. I especially can’t get enough of it if it’s sort of affectionate scolding. Originally posted here.
Comments: Jim and Spock prime hang out
Present
by kyliselle
Words: 917
Summary: A fill for this prompt at st_xi_kink: Kirk/Spock. Deaged!Spock (around 5 or 6) doing arts and crafts. He makes something sweet for Kirk. Originally posted here.
Comments: adorable kid!Spock
✇ Put a Pointy-Eared Baby in Me
by kyliselle
Words: 1,992
Summary: Kirk feels Spock is getting more bossy by the hour, especially towards him. Finally, he can’t stand it anymore and asks for help. Originally posted here. AN: Humor; no mpreg.
Comments: funny as heck.
☆☆ Shine Like the Sun
by kyliselle
Words: ~25,000
Summary: Prompt-fill. An accident leaves Spock with amnesia. His last memory is bringing a cadet up on charges for cheating on the Kobayashi Maru - a cadet who, to his disgust, is now his bondmate.
Comments: super angsty. spock is so harsh, but he’s confused and doesn’t realize how much harm he’s causing. jim and spock need to stop hurting one another, smh. one of my favorite fics.
Perpetual Check (series)
by waketosleep
Words: 7,441
Summary: Kirk and Spock build a relationship through chess.
Comments: smart!Jim
☆ The Secret Sits in the Middle
by waketosleep
Words: 680
Summary: Spock ponders Kirk and the effects of harmful secrets.
Comments: Tarsus IV references.
☆ Whatever Remains (However Improbable)
by waketosleep
Words: 1,632
Summary: A mysterious poem leads Kirk to do some detective work. Uhura is completely, gleefully unhelpful.
Comments: I love me some good poetry
Extracurricular Activities
by awarrington
Words: 15,433
Summary: Spock returns to the Academy from a tour of duty to find an intriguing cadet captures his attention.
Comments: Teacher/student relationship (but, I mean, they’re basically the same age so)
☆☆ Bluebird
by waldorph
Words: 7,087
Summary: “Jim Kirk.” Jim whipped around so fast most of his drink ended up on Spock, who was reaching for the phaser that wasn’t there. The Enterprise crew was parting like the biblical seas before Moses, and Jim could feel the temperature dropping. “Mom,” Jim croaked.
Comments: Star Trek Beyond fic! Winona is a hardass and it’s great. the banter is hecka funny. also: genius Kirk is everything. angst abound. this fic is simple in that you feel comfortable reading it. the characterization feels spot on for everyone.
Disciplined (series)
by waldorph
their tumblr
Words: 3,289
Summary of Part 1: Jim’s pretty sure he’s got mutiny right now. He’s got a lapful of mutiny.
Comments: spanking, porn, & infidelity (but mostly porn)
☆ Lies Your Captain Told You
by waldorph
their tumblr
Words: 1,088
Summary: The building collapsed.
Comments: sad/heart wrenching. this one’s a tearjerker.
my boy builds coffins
by waldorph
their tumblr
Words: 2,618
Summary: Jim Kirk was a legend before he was even an hour old, and legends are never men. They are tragedies and heroes and cautionary tales and they never grow up or grow old, they simply are.
Jim Kirk is a pain in Spock’s ass.
Comments: dark
☆ My Empire of Dirt
by waldorph
their tumblr
Words: 1,012
Summary: He remembers fucking everything. Tries to kill it away but–well. Time’s a tricky little fucker.
Comments: sad/dark. the mind meld with Spock prime fucked Jim up.
☆☆ Two Steps Away
by waldorph
their tumblr
Words: 3,358
Summary: It was a long war.
Comments: aaand I’m bawling my eyes out, great. (future fic)
☆☆ Unraveling
by AnnaKnitsSpock
their tumblr
Words: 34,088
Summary: When the Enterprise receives a December assignment to accompany a Federation investigation on Tarsus IV, Jim is forced to confront not only the trauma he experienced there, but also his conflicted feelings about Christmas, his childhood, and his first officer.
Comments: Jim knits in order to cope. hurt/comfort & angst. possibly my favorite fic about how Tarsus IV affected Jim.
☆ Knitting Lessons
by blcwriter
their tumblr
Words: 4,571
Summary: Spock’s mother knit him a sweater, which develops a hole. Kirk knits it shut– their friendship develops from there. For K/S Advent 2009.
Comments: more knitting! pre-slash. Jim’s more complicated than he looks, folks.
not once but always
by estelares
Words: 6,180
Summary: The Day Jim Kirk Died And Was Revived is also, perhaps more famously, remembered as The Day Spock Lost His Proverbial Marbles and nearly killed a superhuman who had fucking regenerative blood, for crying out loud.
Comments: Into Darkness. hurt/comfort.
☆ On Restless Pinions
by what_alchemy
their tumblr
Words: 23,055
Summary: When Stonn goes into pon farr, T'Pring must break her bond with Spock, which has unforeseen consequences. But that’s not where their story starts.
Comments: real good, my friends. this fic is real good.
✇ The Things We Do
Se7en_devils
Words: 33,323
Summary: The progression of Spock and Kirk’s relationship, shown through snippets. Snippets of crack, that is. Wherein it’s always the aliens, Jim can’t stop kirking up, and McCoy is a doctor, not a porn star damnit!
Comments: literal crack. this fic made me snort giggle, which is quite the feat considering I try to avoid snort giggling at all costs.
walk with me
by obsidianfic
Words: 12,110
Summary: Spock gets a second chance.
Comments: hurt/comfort. Into Darkness fic
I Know You Better
by CaityCat
Words: 4,620
Summary: The people of Twilar are a newly warp-capable species that has caught the eye of the Federation for more reasons beyond its planets’ deep, untouched mines and strategic placement along the border of the neutral zone. The Federation wants Twilar as an ally, but the people of Twilar have a very specific criteria for what makes a leadership team functional.
When Kirk and Spock make First Contact, they are immediately thrown into a globally broadcasted questionnaire competition which will decide whether of not the Twilar join the Federation.
Or, alternatively, Spock and Kirk play a high stakes version of The Newlywed Game.
Comments: with fluff & hurt/comfort.
☆ Immutable Things
by dogpoet
Words: 1,672
Summary: Spock once told you that the universe is made up of parallel worlds, that every choice you make creates two branches on the crooked line of your life.
Comments: a poetic fic about how, no matter the universe, spirk is a constant. Tarsus references.
✇ Into Dark’ness
by Emily_Nicaoida
Words: 1,095
Summary: Uh….I don’t know why I started writing this. There is no plot; that was probably obvious from the title. It’s exactly what it sounds like: a fanfic of My Immortal, as narrated by Spock on his blog.
Buckle up.
Comments: saved the best for last~ (I can’t stop laughing. help me)
Seems like you might want to tell your captain about your family members before they’re literally right in front of him
Um, yeah. But I’ve always wondered why Kirk didn’t, like…read his staff’s personnel files? You’d think he’d be interested in knowing his command staff’s backgrounds at least.
Spock’s entire personnel file was just “References Available Upon Request”
friendship ended with marvel now star trek is my best friend
my fav trope is like, nonhuman characters not understanding human needs/customs but still being super supportive of their human companion
“look what I found while exploring this planet’s surface!” “kilrak please I’m trying to sleep” “ah yes your human circadian rhythm. *stage whispering* I am supposed to be quiet during this time in your rhythm, yes?”
“the book I purchased on ragnok V says humans require physical touch when upset. therefore, I shall engage in a ‘hug’ with you.” *supremely awkward five-armed hug ensues*
*human sneezes* “OH MY GOD SIL'EEN GET THE MEDIC OUR HUMAN IS DYING”
“this pamphlet I received recently says that humans require companions and packmates in the form of small earth creatures. you should have told me this before we departed earth, but it is no worry. we will have to stop at the next trade planet to get you one of these ‘cats’ or ‘dogs’.”
imagine the aliens really purchasing a kitten for one of their rough and world-weary scifi badass human companions and watching in helpless wonderment what ensues
“she’s been cuddling that small animal for the past fifteen minutes just going ‘kitty, kitty’. did we - did we break our human?”
a more seasoned alien puts one of their tentacles around the younger one as the rest of the team gathers to watch their human make kissy noises.
“no, kilrak,” the alien says. “we did good.”
“Human-Steve! I have heard that today is the anniversary of your hatching! According to my human culture pamphlet, it is customary to set a sugary pastry on fire while chanting your species’ growth incantation and presenting sacrifices wrapped in shiny paper. I am afraid to ask, in case this ritual is sacred and this request therefor insensitive… but may I be allowed to participate? It sounds much more fascinating than molting.”
“Human Steve, I have read about your ritual dance called ‘The Hokey Pokey,’ performed mostly at mate-bonding celebrations after the guests reach an elevated level of intoxication. But Human Steve, how do I know WHICH left foot to put in, put out, and shake all about? I do not… Human Steve, why are you laughing?”
“Human-Steve, you are… you are eating, but it is not one of your ritual fueling times. Are you dying? Is everything alright? Have you not been receiving enough sustenance? Do I need to get you better things to eat? Human-Steve, why are you trying to hide that food?”
Humans Are Weird
So there has been a bit of “what if humans were the weird ones?” going around tumblr at the moment and Earth Day got me thinking. Earth is a wonky place, the axis tilts, the orbit wobbles, and the ground spews molten rock for goodness sakes. What if what makes humans weird is just our capacity to survive? What if all the other life bearing planets are these mild, Mediterranean climates with no seasons, no tectonic plates, and no intense weather?
What if several species (including humans) land on a world and the humans are all “SCORE! Earth like world! Let’s get exploring before we get out competed!” And the planet starts offing the other aliens right and left, electric storms, hypothermia, tornadoes and the humans are just … there… counting seconds between flashes, having snowball fights, and just surviving.
To paraphrase one of my favorite bits of a ‘humans are awesome’ fiction megapost: “you don’t know you’re from a Death World until you leave it.” For a ton of reasons, I really like the idea of Earth being Space Australia.
Earth being Space Australia Words cannot express how much I love these posts
Alien: “I’m sorry, what did you just say your comfortable temperature range is?”
Human: “Honestly we can tolerate anywhere from -40 to 50 Celcius, but we prefer the 0 to 30 range.”
Alien: “……. I’m sorry, did you just list temperatures below freezing?”
Human: “Yeah, but most of us prefer to throw on scarves or jackets at those temperatures it can be a bit nippy.”
Other human: “Nah mate, I knew this guy in college who refused to wear anything past his knees and elbows until it was -20 at least.”
Human: “Heh. Yeah everybody knows someone like that.”
Alien: “……. And did you also say 50 Celcius? As in, half way to boiling?”
Human: “Eugh. Yes. It sucks, we sweat everywhere, and god help you if you touch a seatbelt buckle, but yes.”
Alien: “……. We’ve got like 50 uninhabitable planets we think you might enjoy.”
“You’re telling me that you have… settlements. On islands with active volcanism?” “Well, yeah. I’m not about to tell Iceland and Hawaii how to live their lives. Actually, it’s kind of a tourist attraction.” “What, the molten rock?” “Well, yeah! It’s not every day you see a mountain spew out liquid rocks! The best one is Yellowstone, though. All these hot springs and geysers from the supervolcano–” “You ACTIVELY SEEK OUT ACTIVE SUPERVOLCANOES?” “Shit, man, we swim in the groundwater near them.”
Sounds like the “Damned” trilogy by Alan Dean Foster.
“And you say the poles of your world would get as low as negative one hundred with wind chill?”
“Yup, with blizzards you cant see through every other day just about.”
“Amazing! when did you manage to send drones that could survive such temperatures?”
“… well, actually…”
“… what?”
“…we kinda……. sent……….. people…..”
“…”
“…”
“…what?”
“we sent-”
“no yeah I heard you I just- what? You sent… HUMANS… to a place one hundred degrees below freezing?”
“y-yeah”
“and they didn’t… die?”
“Well the first few did”
“PEOPLE DIED OF THE COLD AND YOUR SOLUTION WAS TO SEND MORE PEOPLE???!?!?!?”
My new favorite Humans are Weird quote
“PEOPLE DIED OF THE COLD AND YOUR SOLUTION WAS TO SEND MORE PEOPLE?”
aka The History of Russia
aka Arctic Exploration
aka The History of Alaska
‘But surely you have records of volcanic activity doing tremendous damage to human settlements.’
‘Yep. Pompeii is legendary. Entire cities went. Towns buried under lava, peoples’ brains boiled in the first rush of heat, loads more killed by falling pumice.’
‘ah, good, they learned their lesson and didn’t build there again.’
‘…well…’
‘Are you seriously telling me this volcano is legendary for killing several urban conurbations and you built on top of it AGAIN?’
‘In our defence it hasn’t actually done it since.’
‘What about earthquake-prone areas? Tell me you’re at least vaguely sensible about those.’
‘Oh yeah. After the first major earthquake that flattens a city, we build them better.’
I live on both Earth Australia and Sace Australia.
alien: people died of the cold and your solution was to send more people
human:
Aliens and monsters fascinated by humans will never stop being a thing for me
These are my favorite posts.
Alien - Ok, so tell me about war.
Human - Ok - lists everything from the 300 Spartans to possible WW3 -
Alien - So who are these people fighting in a square and a caged circle?
Human - Those are sports fighters.
Alien - You fight each other for fun?
Human - Yes.
Alien - WHEN YOU HAVE ALL THESE WARS!? THAT WOULD EXPLAIN IT!
Human - Well there’s the geneva convention. - explains what it is -
Alien - YOU BANNED WEAPONS OF WAR BECAUSE THEY WERE TOO EFFECTIVE!?
Human - It’s like cheating.
Alien - AT WAR!?!? WHERE YOU ACTIVE GOAL IS TO KILL EACH OTHER!? YOU ARE WORRIED ABOUT CHEATING!?
Human -…………………..
Alien - What?
Human - Nothing.
Alien - No, what? There’s something else isn’t there?
Human - Nukes are not technically banned under the convention.
Human: All this celebration needs is some booze
Alien: some what now?
Human: Booze. Alcoholic drinks.
Alien: What is alcohol?
Human: Ethanol. C2H6O
Alien: wait, isn’t that the stuff your people use as disinfectant?
Human: yup.
Alien: and a fuel additive?
Human: yup.
Alien: Isn’t that a poison!?
Human: well yeah, but it’s watered down when we drink it.
Alien: !?
THIS IS MY FAVORITE SHIT
So what about the fact that humans can take so much abuse to the body and miraculously survive
Alien: So let me just review: You have records of people surviving fatal wounds commonly…
Human: Uh-huh.
Alien: And some of these stories include stab wounds to the brain…
Human: Oh, yeah, all the time.
Alien:….and then…surviving and even improving from crippling injuries or brain damage…
Human: Those are some of the truly strong ones, that.
Alien: Yes…indeed…………………………………………………
Human: What? What is it?
Alien: It’s just…..well………we had heard….rumors….
Human: Of?
Alien: It’s nothing. They’re false, they must be! Humans coming back from the dead–it’s funny really!
Human: o-o……………..
Alien: You must be joking.
Human: UM………WELL…….
Alien: TELL ME YOU’RE JOKING. PLEASE.
Human: *patting the alien sympathetically* I’m…sorry?
Alien: *slams head on table. Done*
This is the best thing in the entire world
If Aliens ever come to earth DO NOT TELL THEM THE DIFFERENCE OD CLINICAL DEATH AND PROPER DEATH!

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Hey guys, so I’ve never made a Google form before, but, I’m curious about people’s headcanons about Star Trek characters. So if you like, fill out the form and tell me your thoughts!
That’s your OPINIONNNNN
Someone commented on a chapter which I wrote in a blur. I was worried it was going to be a cringe fest, but then:
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I don't know what this is about but I love it.
I firmly believe that you can never self promote too much so here you go, (excerpts are from chapter 8)
Success
Hey I've read this before!
It's been a while, but this fic was touching and heartwarming and all of the fuzzy feel good words you get from an emotionally satisfying conclusion.
I agree that it was hilarious and had some great running gags like the Garn character in the screenshots.
Also A+ for a great inclusion of Uhura. Lovely characterization and friendship between her and Spock (I'm 100% here for Spuhura BFFs), and no Uhura-bashing to further the Spirk plot.
Overall, I highly recommend!