as told by denia..

hobbies: being asleep, getting ready to go to sleep, going to sleep, getting into my bed, waking up and realizing i can go back to sleep, sleeping, being in my bed (asleep), falling asleep,

Me at work: wow I can’t wait to go home and take a shower and make some food and wash my clothes and learn advanced biology and apply for NASA and make a breakthrough in modern physics Me: *Gets home and falls asleep on the door handle*

My grandpa has the heart of the lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo..

what makes it more adorable is he offered to call when he knew something was wrong

I also love how often the word bro was used

This is the proper way to be a bro.

# how to bro 101

[A large and fluffy dog is sleeping on a porch. A tiny grey bird is bouncing around on the dog, stealing its fur.  Its tiny beak is full of dog floof.  The dog is totally still and does not appear to have noticed the thief.]

a burglar

a birbler

where can i buy this hoodie???

no shade or anything, but not everything is as it seems

what kind of wizards of waverly place plagiarism?

As I get older the more I appreciate straight forward people. Like if you’re mad at me I will respect you if you tell me. I don’t understand adults that would rather stomp their feet and use passive aggressive behavior to communicate. Life does not have to be this difficult fam

These insults give me life

mangled apricot hellbeast

This is epically epic!

I mean, this is amazing

holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS. 

I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT 

SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP

WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????

ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE

I wish for someone to leave something in my ask.

OKAY SO I ASKED FOR A HEDGEHOG AND NOW GUESS WHO HAS A PET HEDGEHOG

THIS WORKs I WISHED I WAS MOVING TO NORTH CAROLINA AND GUESS WHAT GUYS IM MOVING TO NC IN AUGUST I PROMISE U IM NOT LYING

guys ok ur probably thinking that this is all just bs right? WELL I THOUGHT SO TOO BUT I WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD CHAT ME AND HE DID AND IM FREAKING OUT not even kidding i swear on my grampas grave this works

I love this it always works for me yey thank u shooting star :’)

woah the notes let’s hope my wish comes true

Omg I wished my crush would turn up to work and he did

goin home to be ugly in peace is one of my fav things to do