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@artistshands

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I Kissed a Girl being knocked off #1 on the Hot 100 by Disturbia which was knocked off by Live Your Life which was knocked off by So What which was knocked off by Womanizer which was knocked off by Single Ladies which was knocked off by Just Dance which was knocked off by My Life Would Suck Without You which was knocked off by Right Round which was knocked off by Poker Face is an insane run of HITS. We really said the Global Recession needs the cuntiest soundtrack.
I LOVE being alive so I can be mediocre at SO many different hobbies
does anyone know what the first step of unlearning shame is. please say it’s substance abuse
Okay so, not a funny answer, BUT:
My therapist said that the difference between Shame and Guilt is that Guilt is what we Do, and Shame is what we Are.
She said that if we are experiencing pervasive Shame, we need to identify what part of us we believe is Shameful and figure out *why* we believe that.
Once we find the shameful thing, we decide if it’s rational- something we don’t like about ourselves and would be better off changing- or if it’s irrational- something we have been taught to believe that isn’t helpful or useful.
If it’s irrational, we identify where it came from, and reconsider the circumstances by which we learned it until we come to a kinder, more productive conclusion.
This conclusion could involve Guilt, but because Guilt is from Actions instead of Identity, we can let it go by choosing to act differently in the future.
Which is a difficult lesson, but really does well against compulsive self-destruction!
this tweet hasn't left my mind once in the two years since it's been posted

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friends who make you feel like an excitable puppy with too many exclamatory marks versus friends who make you feel like a sedate and unbothered geriatric cat
This guy is really going to regret sitting down with Jon
he literally could not care less about what's being said here. this has always been a waste of time. just kill these people
They do not care about hypocrisy, about consistency, about facts, about truth.
They care about power.
They will say anything, believe anything, and do anything that gains more power for themselves or takes it away from others. Doing “gotcha” questions and logic-dunking on them doesn’t work, because they don’t care about being right, they care about having power. They engage in hypocrisy on purpose, as an act of domination over the fools who believe in things like truth and principles and integrity. Their willingness to override reality gives them power over people who believe reality matters. Trying to debate them is pointless. The only winning move is not to play. Shut them down and shut them out at every opportunity.
-satre
Exactly. There's not gonna be a "gotcha" where they're like, "oh oops you're right. I'll stop"
All of this is 1000% true.
However.
The “gotcha” moments are NOT FOR THEM.
They’re for others. For observers. For people who may be buying into this on ideological grounds. Who might care about what’s true and what’s reality and what is and isn’t hypocrisy.
It’s for THEM to hear that these people don’t care about integrity.
Fruit will last 3 weeks longer….
Why You Should Keep Fruit In Mason Jars Instead Of The Containers They Come In…….
When you get your fruit home from the grocery store, the first thing you should do is remove it from the plastic containers they’ve come in and recycle them. Next, clean out your sink and fill it with water (you could also use a large bowl). Then, toss in a few tablespoons of distilled vinegar. You’ll then want to submerge your fruit in the water and let it soak for about 10 to 15 minutes. The purpose of this is to get rid of any mold or bacteria on the fruit which is what causes them to go rotten more quickly.
Once the fruit has had a nice soak, remove it from the vinegar water, transfer to a strainer, and rinse with cool water. Leave the fruit out to dry on a tea towel or paper towel. Once dry, transfer the fruit to mason jars and seal up those lids. This is the best way to make your fruit last, particularly berries, which tend to be very prone to mold and bacteria buildup.
And that’s it! Incorporating these few extra steps into preparing and storing fruit can help you eliminate food waste, save money, and keep your fridge stocked with fresh produce for much longer.
helpful advice for people who don’t eat the entire kilo of raspberries on the ten minute walk back from the supermarket, yay!
"you're just racist"
when the Final Girl has an adhd infodump moment

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#bisexuality accurately portrayed by steve harrington
INFORMATION I WAS NOT PREPARED TO LEARN. MAYBE WE *ARE* ALONE. BECAUSE WE ARE SO *EARLY*. IF THERE IS EVER GALACTIC CIVILIZATION THEY WILL NOT REMEMBER US AT ALL. BECAUSE WE ARE NOTHING. CELLS, JUST BEGINNING TO FORM LIFE. SORRY FOR SCREAMING. BUT ARE YOU LISTENING. ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT IT.
The planet was nothing special.
Well, there were some quirks. It was carbon-based, which was mildly interesting, and Arc’s shuttle readouts told her that it was the plants that had developed photosynthesis, weirdly. The atmosphere had a massive amount of oxygen, and there was all that water, too, more than she had ever seen in one place before. And every planet was, as her trainers had told her, its own unique jewel.
But one thing they had not told her was that all the jewels started to blend together after a while, and after a little longer each one became just another assignment. So the planet was just another assignment. A little ball of water and tumbled stone and flora in a cul-de-sac of the galaxy. One more stack of paperwork for Arc to get through before she could go home to her marital partners and offspring.
Arc aimed her shuttle in the middle of one of the larger continents, away from the mountain range and near a smaller body of (oh, gosh, more) water. As she got closer to the ground, though, her shuttle readouts changed. There were irregular smudges of radiation on the surface, and chemical evidence of constructed materials. Arc squinted, and her tertiary limbs started to shiver in frustration. There were ruins down there. Nobody had told her she’d be surveying a formerly inhabited planet. Great, she thought. Now I’m never getting home.
Arc sent a note by ansible to Ecba, her dearest marital partner. A few mins later, as her shuttle settled on the ground, she got back the image of a hand-sculpted message. “My little machine,” it said, Ecba’s sweetheart-name for her, and she could see all the love that went into the lettering. “Does it have to be you?”
Arc put on her enviro-suit and got her surveying monitor. “Maybe not,” she sent. She didn’t have the same skill in sculpting that Ecba had, so she just had to trust that her love was conveyed in the digital lettering. “Wish me luck. I’ll try to come home to you all soon.”
Then she stepped out into the world.
saw an ant on the bus today, what a horrible fate. moved an unfathomable distance from everything you've ever known because of forces you could never possibly understand. no matter how long you follow the pheromone trail you laid you'll never find your way home.
Why has this got so many notes what the fuck Tumblr
1) It’s title says something 2) The pictures provide what the title says 3) It ends with someone dramatically looking toward the camera
cause its funny look how thin that watermelon is its just flapping in the wind thats absurd

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*thor hands peter a mug of beer*
Thor: Exellent work in the mission man of spiders!
Tony: Thor no the kid is 15.
Thor: Oh!
*hands peter two mugs of beer*
Thor: You are a growing boy.
Tony: Thor no.
EVERY TIME I SEE THIS POST IM WEAK
What makes it even better is that after filming one day or whatever, Chris Hemsworth actually had to buy Tom his drinks because the bars wouldn’t believe he was 21
Homeboy just said the quiet part into a fucking bullhorn.