what

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

its like ive never seen herbivore

Tylenol is the people's princess

Tylenol is real! I love you Tylenol!

i cant believe that there's still gamergate STANK on games that women enjoy. NASTY misogyny residue. stardew valley is in fact a video game. animal crossing is also a video game. so are otome games and dating sims and twee little cozy games. sometimes a bitch doesnt wanna play bloodborne that shit's hard

guys who mainly play 2k and fortnite will still be like oh youre not a real gamer for having 1000 hours in stardew. mother fucker you're larping as a basketball player

ive noticed u made the common mistake of stoppijg petting me so i will whine and paw ur paw until u realize this mistake its ok its a common mistake here let me lay on u to makr it easier

alright I'm almost finished Project Hail Mary, and I have to say, I don't get why people are shipping the guy with Markiplier when he's already in a perfectly healthy queer-platonic relationship with the alien spider made of rocks

Frankly, I think companies presenting basic health and consumer safety information as "boring," "uncool," and "not worth your care" should carry a hefty fine based on the revenue that company generates

The lameo gay crap we're legally forced to tell you: You may die of diseentary

as a child i assumed that martha’s vineyard was a fancy private vineyard owned by martha stewart and the reason rich people vacationed there was because they were friends with martha

I definitely make spaghetti sauce extremely wrong but I'm not going to stop

Absolurl I deranged, Derin. Food crimes.

It means. It means you cook em a little in a pan with a bit of oil first.

A pan? How many dishes do you want me to have to wash here?

I mean you can also do it in the same pot you're making the spaghetti sauce in! The important thing is the onions get a little cooked before the wet stuff goes in, so they're not so wet and limp and boiled....

Honestly this depends entirely on whether I remember to chop an onion first or I find the can opener for the tomatoes first. The ingredients go in in whatever order they go in.

Derin who hurt you

A pack of wild chefs herded my mother off a cliff

did ur mum get 2021 cruellaed

Yeah and now I'm in a war against food. I have to hunt down and kill Remy next.

I don't think you'll catch him. I think he'll smell that horrible sauce from miles afar and will run in the opposite direction. Jesus Christ Derin they sell sauce in jars you don't have to live like this.

I'm not buying that stuff I am a fancy chef

I've also been putting some chilli peppers in it.

They found the last golden ticket . So that’s just it then . Fuck my stupid horrible pathetic life. Cabbage soup for dinner again , my stupid mothtsr. Grandpa Joe said he’s sorry but I know he doesn’t really give a fuck . And who gives a fuck about the other three old people in my house . Whatever their names is. Fuck fuck fuck it’s all worthless . They even made fun of me at school for only buying like 3 wonka bars. Nepo pricks . Fuck my stupid life it’s all fucked it’s all fucked . And my last name is bucket

it's good that I will never be a dog breeder, bc I would make the elephant dog. long borzoi snout, chunky pitbull body, ears of a papillon

"he would not fucking say that" but about injuries. he would not fucking recover that quickly. those scars would not fucking heal like that. he would not be fucking able bodied after that. he would not be fully lucid after that.

Nothing good.

ice water is awesome because you get more water in your water

you think youre out of water but then you check back in five minutes and woah! theres more water! the world is so beautiful