AAAHHHH!!!!

i do actually think it's crazy that employers get a say over shit like tattoos and piercings and we just let that happen

Trying to have a cute homoerotic sword duel with my narrative foil but she refuses to engage with any of my banter and just goes for the kill shot every time

Unreliable narrator abruptly realising they've mixed up which narrative thread is the red herring and which is the actual plot and they've been deceiving the audience about the wrong thing the entire time.

what’s a little creampie between mutuals

YOU STUPID FUCKING DICKHEAD!!!!! YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE THROUGH THE x10 GATE NOT THE x2!!!! YOU WON'T HAVE ENOUGH MEN!!! IT'S ALL FUCKED!!!!!!!!

“they never explicitly looked at the camera and said ‘i am experiencing immense grief’ so how was i supposed to know??” i don’t know what to tell you, man. if a story doesn’t spoon-feed you the character's internal emotional state like a jar of mashed peas, you guys just willingly starve. subtext is not a myth, i promise it won't bite you.

sci fi is all about getting so scared and ripping tubes out of yourself. people miss this

sci fi is all about desperately trying to reclaim your violated bodily autonomy. it’s all about asserting that you are a being with agency, and you can choose what happens to your own person, even if that’s ripping tubes out of yourself. and also sometimes an alien is there

this is a fun post because people will say how many they have in the tags then you get to figure out which ones.

who up wasting their only shot at life through complete and utter inaction

I won't ever get over the removal of headphone jacks, or micro sd slots, or cd drives. I won't. Fuck everyone and everything

its not reccomended amd probably not legal but in a pinch a coyote can be your plus one to most events

working with little kids is so dangerous. you get one kid who has a unique way of speaking & then spend the rest of your life with an internal monologue like “me’s go bathroom?”

I mean, in some very interesting Technically Correct ways, they didn't actually die? Now, they're very much no longer alive. But the forces involved are such that they didn't get any of the usual cellular processes of death, they simply went from biology to physics in less time than it takes a signal to travel down your optic nerve.

if you go from biology to physics without dying first you don’t go to heaven the uber driver went over this already