Proud 2 B Nerd

probably nothing lesbian will happen to me this pride but by god i can Hope

words cannot describe how much i love showering. my wet contemplative box

Stop warning me about mature content I'm literally an adult

The ancient texts were true… They DO have a reaction image for everything…

i think one of the best parts about being a teenager in the early to mid 2010s was that cigarettes were definitely not cool anymore and vapes hadn’t popularized yet so my lungs made it out of my peak impressionable years relatively unscathed

I wish people were as scared of getting into a car accident as they are of being true crime'd. Maybe then they wouldn't be on their phones while driving.

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

World Heritage Post

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me

good morning to the beaten and the damned only

the position of the mischevious pig marks the hours

SUPER TOP SECRET WORK HACK!!! If you explicitly tell people, "You are an adult and a professional, I trust you to do your job; just keep me in the loop and let me know if there are questions," then thank and/or praise them when they accomplish your mutual goals? they will keep doing things for and with you. Sometimes they will even side with you over other people in the organization, because you've taken the time to establish that baseline respect and trust! hashtag winning or whatever

I usually phrased it to middle-schoolers as, "I was a weird artist before I was a teacher, so I don't understand how children work, really. So I am going to treat you guys like adults unless and until you give me a reason not to." It's amazing how far they'll go to keep that adult status.

The four most interesting parts of time loop are when the person kills themselves for the first time, when they kill someone else for the first time (in a fuck around kind of way, this doesn't count if they already were killing people outside of the loop), how they break the loop, and the weeks afterward where they loose their fucking minds in an entirely different, significantly more damaging to the world around them way. And yet I rarely see anything done with that last one. People leave time loops and are all happy go lucky 'oh boy'. Where's the grappling with people you know who will never know you? Where's the knowledge that the safety of the loop is gone, and you can't fix any mistakes you make? That's the good angst I want

“Oh you wanna look at the menu? Just scan this QR code!” And what if I blew this place up?