And Have No Thorns To Distance Me

Both Xbox and Playstation have had their servers go down in the last 24 hours, making digital purchases unplayable while they're offline

i made a post like this before but I can't find it now. so. I'll just redo it.

I think every fandom is like this and the fallout fandom probably just stands out to me because it's the one I was the most active in - once upon a time - but God if there aren't some miserable fucking assholes there. My experience of the Fallout fandom on Tumblr is like

“Pansies I was holding my heart in the palms of my nervous hand My heart had 200 broken windows, glass covering the floor and amazing light in almost every room My heart was beating like a pillow fight. Feathers were flying everywhere I couldn’t stop crying for all those birds I could not stop crying I planted my heart in the raised bed in your bedroom Pansies bloomed all night You called me “pretty” and I didn’t flinch, I knew I could still be your boyfriend And tell you my grandmother sowed my prom dress, stitch by stitch, with her own hands The finest suit couldn’t have made me more proud Our hearts beat so loud the neighbours think we’re fucking when I’m just trying to find the nerve to touch your face You don’t ask God how long this will last I don’t care about any of the words on the map besides You are here You are here listening to me tell you I’ve been stung by a bee only twice in my life Both times I was sung in the mouth I still carry the stingers under my tongue So I never forget where honey comes from Sweet Sweet Siren I imagine you ruining oklahoma farm boys in the beds of their daddies trucks I want to take you to church and show you what I can do to your confession booth on a saturday night And you already know how many love poems I have written to women who are not you and you already know that every word was true There is still a tandem bicycle in my garage I know I will never have the heart to ride or sell So I know you know I am not wondering why you kept your married name I am here watching you do your laundry And I want to match your socks just so you can put them on and I can take them off Take everything off Yes, I have a history of fainting No, I wasn’t lying when I told you I am going to be more difficult than anyone you’ve ever dated It has been years since my life was a picnic where I wasn’t freaking out about the possible gluten allergies of the pigeons being fed bread in the park But you will always feel safe knowing I will never make a piñata of your heart You will never have to lose yourself to win me over Tell me you’re a liar I will say I already know you are a mastered yogi when it comes to stretching the truth But ill be willing to bet that we both have a history of downward dog and sometimes you’ve got to bend to keep seeing god isn’t always as clean as a whistle but that train is something I can worship if only because it keeps showing up I am at your station saying If i were a painter I would paint every billboard in this city bright white Buy a projector and take you to a new drive in movie every single night If I were an oven mitt I would say never touch anything hot without me Obviously I am going to do stupid things I once sold my saxophone to help pay for college I once smashed a violin to bits on our second date When I said “So your vagina it’s really rad that babies have come out of it” What I meant to say was “Holy shit. You’ve given birth. I can’t imagine anything sexier than a woman checking her children’s homework.” For the record, You are getting straight A’s in chemistry class For the record, I am flunking math It has been too few days to add up to me saying Yes, I am going to permanently fuck up your lip stick Yes, I am going to throw tantrums through your tidy heart Yes, I am going to fall apart at your mother’s dinner table over green beans and lentils and somebody’s sensible doubt Yes, I am gonna run you a bath That is to say I am gonna run into the rain over and over, with an empty glass, ‘till you are soaking in the certainty that nothing falls in vain Wherever we land, there will always be this day where I turn off the song of my sadness, and your shame, where I stop asking what all the crying has been about All I know is my name could rust entirely away in your perfect mouth”

“Sometimes the break in your heart is like the hole in the flute. Sometimes it’s the place where the music comes through.”