when i was a kid i was so mad all the time bc i thought someday i'd have to be somebody's wife i didn't know it was optional. is everybody reminding the young girls in their lives that it's optional.
AND SO IS BEING SOMEBODY'S MOTHER‼️
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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@allos-aro
when i was a kid i was so mad all the time bc i thought someday i'd have to be somebody's wife i didn't know it was optional. is everybody reminding the young girls in their lives that it's optional.
AND SO IS BEING SOMEBODY'S MOTHER‼️

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breaking my silence. it is insane that a marriage is more celebrated than earning a degree.
bookbinding adventures continue! this time with project hail mary.
this amazing cover design is by @aroarolibrary, go check out the original! I've been wanting to do this book forever (like. a month) but didn't have any ideas. saw aroace flag cover. had to make it immediately. so thanks for sharing the design and making it easy to recreate!
💬 33 🔁 1671 ❤️ 4439 · I’m so happy so many people like this!! If anyone wants to try and actually make this in to a book (like I am hoping
!!!!!! It turned out exactly how I hoped it would!! It looks amazing! And that matching nebula inner cover! It’s so perfect 😭😭😭. I commend your hard work on putting it together. I’m so happy to see it on an actual physical book!
bathe in your own sunlight !!!!!!
@aromanticofficial
don't wait for someone else to make you feel important! you're already important by being here!
Welp, you all won’t believe what I stayed up to 2 am working on!
Anyway, have an aroace themed Project Hail Mary cover. I tried to keep a good chunk of the OG cover design (because I actually really like it) and just added in some fun additions to it~
Maybe one day I’ll actually be able to learn some book binding and actually put this on the book 😆. Hopes and dreams.
@chaoticneutralpanic
All of the book binding videos I saved due to a hyperfixation a good year ago or so
They’re finally coming to good use
I have gift ideas so many gift ideas
I shared the transparent PNG files for each color in a reblog so please have at!! (If you do make a book I would like to see pictures!)

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[Description: A divorce lawyer answering the question "do you believe in soulmates?"
He answers: I believe that whoever created the concept of soulmates should be taken into the town square and beaten to death. Or you should tell me who they are so I can send them a check for a couple of hundred thousand dollars, because they have done more to facilitate the demise of happy marriages than I could ever aspire to doing.
The concept of a soulmate to me is absolutely bizarre. To suggest that out of eight billion other people in the world, that there's just this one person, and they happen by the way to live within like the same town as you, where they went to the same university as you - what were the odds of that? And that's the only person you could ever have a happy, fulfilling relationship with. That's insane, folks. It's insane. And by the way, it's toxic. Because here's the thing: when you get married, society essentially tells you, this person, they're supposed to be your best friend, best lover, best roommate, best travel companion, best co-parent - that's a hell of a resume, guy. Like, it'd be shocking to find someone who fits all three of those things.
So what happens when you have this concept of a soulmate? And my partner, you know, they're the best co-parent, they're the best roommate, the best travel companion, but you know, they're not the best lover I ever had. Well, they mustn't be your soulmate then. That means that there's somebody out there in the eight billion people, that they would be the perfect one. And that's what the horizon that just forever recedes and keeps people constantly craving the next thing that might check all of the boxes. It's dangerous.
Look, we break in relationship, we heal in relationship. You're marrying a human being. They're just as flawed as you. They have great moments, they have awful moments, they have heroic moments, they have villainous moments. This idea that somebody out there is going to be this perfect angelic presence in your life, it is a fiction, and it is the siren song that's gonna send you right into the rocks of my office. /End Description]
ship wars are dumb. Polyamory and aromanticism are easy, simple, and effective solutions
I don't see how polyamory or aromanticism could patch up the holes in my hull but if you say so
The concept that married people live longer is interesting. I'm sure there is some merit to the idea that if you're married there is someone there to nag you about going to the doctor, but I think much larger factors are having the finances of dual incomes and access to an immediate support person.
Surgeries require having a designated person to look after you. Many injuries require driving to somewhere like an emergency room which can be hard to do if you are the one injured. If you're home with the flu, it's hard to tell when it's bad enough to go to the hospital without another person checking on you. And if you pass out it requires another person to find you like that to get medical aid.
You can prop it up as the benefits of marriage, but I think there's a much deeper discussion to be had about how we've built society around marriage as an inevitable conclusion and neglected to build support systems that function outside of romantic pairings.
thinking about this further, people often cite this as a sort of See It's Better To Be Married and mostly accept it as a fact that being married is better for you overall and proceed to breakdown why marriage leads to longer lives. Instead I think we need to be looking at why the system is failing single people and what we could do to close that gap. What structural societal changes can we make to help single people rather than treat it as a Well Obviously foregone conclusion that everyone will eventually pair up.
It's not Why Are Married People Healthier? It's Why Aren't Single People as Healthy? And then actually examine the causes rather than hand waving it away with whichever stereotype of being single or half remembered memory of the last time you were single in your early 20s.
You're absolutely right that dual incomes probably help, though a lot of marriages may not have that and there's the stress of unpaid work, but most commonly, the explanation I see for 'married people live longer' is far and wide 'someone is looking for them.'
If at home is out of reach of a phone and has a heart attack, a fall, a stroke, a freak accident: they are not getting help until someone finds them.
If someone lives home alone, it may be a full day or more before help comes. Most emergency conditions are fatal by that point.
But if you're married, your spouse will probably notice if you get up in the middle of the night and never come back to bed. They are more likely to hear a sudden fall, or to at least find you within a few hours when they come home from work. They may notice strange behavior that may indicate a stroke, and if they notice in under 24 hours it may be reversed.
Someone living alone having a stroke may not be able to leave their bed. They will not be found until someone comes looking for them. Their work will assume they're ditching, and only call in for a wellness check if they think that's out of character Classmates will assume they're sick or something came up. Maybe they call their family once a week and the lack of communication will be noticed.
But someone who lives with you will notice you can't get out of bed and will call you an ambulance.
It's not that married people live longer: people who live with other people live longer.
I mean this isn't just a straight forward one contributing factor by any means. Living with people who know your habits can help, but we've also just built a lot of walls of isolation into society as a whole that make health and life more difficult for individuals who don't participate in a romantic relationships.
Getting paid leave to take care of a sick roommate isn't often allowed, but if it's your spouse or significant other, your employer is more willing to accommodate that. Bereavement leave is for close relatives not friends or roommates. You can connect your spouse to insurance. Your sibling, parent, and bestie don't qualify.
There are a lot of very specific ways in which marriage specifically is accommodated that benefit all those involved in ways other relationships aren't recognized. Living with anyone changes things from living alone, but there's more going on than just that.
It is also not just the actual statistics on life expectancy rates, but also the way we as a society only discuss them in relation to marriage when we want to make a point about the institution as a whole and often that is as a gesture towards it as confirmation that that is the correct thing to do.
at some point, we're really gonna have to start talking about how popular queer media correlates wanting sex with no strings attached with traits like being manipulative, exploitative, abusive, or even predatory. because queer media can talk big game about how aromanticism is cool and valid, but they still turn around and make the antagonist someone who doesn't want a relationship. you support us in name only, you don't wanna give a second's thought to the actual experiences of aromantics. "oh, but this character isn't aromantic!! they're just afraid of commitment!!!" do you have any idea how often actual aromantics are told that shit.

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Once again asking y'all to remember loveless, aplatonic, and afamilial aros this valentines day. Some aros don't have any kind of interest in substituting any other kind of love for romantic love, and there's nothing wrong with that.
'Aro people aren't against love' I am. Break up with your boyfriend
happy valentines day to the creators of koisenu futari and to the creators of koisenu futari only
[ID: Seven Koisenu Futari-themed valentine’s cards with “to” and “from” written on each.
The first image is of a cooked crab on a plate. The text reads, “Will you be my fake date at my family dinner? (There will be crab).”
The second image is of Sakuko smiling. The text reads, “Will you be a family (subject to change) with me?”
The third image is of flowers in Takahashi’s garden. The text reads, “Would you like to hear my rant on amatonormativity? Too late, you’re going to hear it anyway.”
The fourth image is of a plate of cake slices. The text reads, “Oh, there will be cake? And everyone else will be otherwise distracted from said cake by talk of their crushes? Count me in.”
The fifth image is of a fully-stamped store rewards card. The text reads, “Will you go strategically shopping with me so that my accumulated returning customer points don’t go to waste?”
The sixth image is of Takahashi holding up booklets in each hand. The text reads, “Will you move in with me? I’m desperate for my neighbors to stop sending me marriage pamphlets and photos of their nieces. Like what am I even supposed to do with these.”
The seventh image is of Takahashi smiling. The text reads, “There are indeed people who don’t fall in love. Hope that helps,” followed by a text emoticon for a heart. /END ID]
ah shit sorry man i didnt mean to spill my "aro4aro friends with benefits relationship" all over your favorite ship, fuck dude my bad, it wont happen again
love is in the air? wrong. evil skull
@anthropoidium evil skull

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Teaching you things you should know part one: Someone Having A Seizure
1) Start recording. I know, recording someone having a seizure, especially if they're a stranger, can be awkward, but it is REALLY important! Not only can you show this to the paramedics/doctors so they can determine what kind of seizure it is, but it also allows you too see how LONG they've been having said seizure. Normally, you would call an ambulance straight away, but you can also wait for five minutes, and if the person hasn't stopped seizing, then it is a medical emergency and you call the ambulance then
2) Move anything that might hurt them away from them. They will most likely be having a Tonic Clonic seizure, so their body will be jerking around. Moving things away from them helps limit the amount of injury they'll get from uncontrollable movements
3) Put something soft under their head. Inside the home it will be quite easy, as you have cushions or blankets. But, if you are on the street you can use a jacket or scarf or bag. This helps ensure they don't suffer any head injuries
4) DON'T PUT ANYTHING IN THEIR MOUTH!! It is a myth that you can swallow your tongue when you seize, as you can't swallow your tongue. You CAN however still swallow things, so putting something in their mouth can damage the insides or make them choke.
5) Once conscious, you put them in the Recovery Position (Turn the person gently to their left side, and make sure their mouth is pointing the ground) so they don't choke on any vomit they might have
6) Stay with them until they are fully conscious! Seizures are very disorienting and can cause the person to worry. Staying with them makes sure they know they aren't alone. Or at least stay with them until the paramedics show up, you are free to stay or leave but MAKE SURE YOU SHOW THE PARAMEDICS YOUR RECORDING OF THE SEIZURE!!
Hopefully this has been useful, it's always important to know what to do in medical emergencies
an angel gains its wings every time someone realizes sex without romance is not inherently abusive