I mix my metaphors like similes

To add another layer to the nightmare of this "art", it looks like the cheerleaders all resemble young Ronald Regan. yikes

He hasn't had his pompom replacement surgery yet

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse danny devito and he would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

Your brother is the best

Who the fuck changed this from vampires to Danny devito

the real question is why I was completely ready to accept that this person had a debilitating childhood fear of Danny Devito

World Heritage Post

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

Taylor Swift does this

no she doesn’t

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

#I'm fucking crying#this is an instant classic#this is the next meme#i can't believe I'm here to see a baby copypasta nary two hours old#I can't#lol#i laughed way too hard#iconic

i went to queer history and signaling and i didnt see taylor swift

what they DONT tell you about clarinets is that you have to fucking build the damn thing every single time. "what instrument do you play" fucking legos man idk

about build clarinets damn do DONT every fucking fucking have idk instrument is legos man play" single tell that the they thing time. to what "what you you you

I really need to start reading the blog name because I thought I was having some sort of moment right there.

best m/f dynamic is a flamboyant bisexual show-off desperately in love with an extremely practical girl who’s difficult to impress 🤩

Whenever Americans use Cryillic like. That. I just. Instantly shrivel up an cry

Like idk how to tell you this but н isnt h and и isnt n

It’s true and you should say it.

If you want to explain, what does it mean then? 0.0

н makes n sound,и makes ee sound, я makes ya sound, р makes r sound, в makes v sound

you mean, like, ня?

oh no. It can be made with Cyrillic now

ня

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE EXPLAINED

НЯ

НЯ

OH. GOD.

THATS SO FUNNY

"I hate when the skeletons on decorations aren't anatomically accurate." A Halloween skeleton isn't the same as what's inside you, idiot. It's different. A Halloween skeleton is, like. A guy or something. It's an animal.

If Halloween skeletons had bones like ours instead of hollow bones like that of a bird, they wouldn't be able to play their ribcages like xylophones. You sound so fucking uneducated right now.

Both options convey that he's horny

How dare you be funnier than me on my own post

They say ooooh be a good boy for daddy and you'll get a reward. But then the reward is just gay sex. This is bullshit. I wanted a skateboard

Then they say if you're a bad boy daddy will punish you. But what's the punishment? More gay sex! You can't escape it. This whole damn place is in the pocket of Big Sex

Babies are socially accepted parasites.

When u read Ayn Rand 1 time

They’re not a parasite, they’re a potential investment

When you read Ayn Rand a dozen times

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

This post is getting marked NSFW and I think that’s a travesty.

You’re wrong, the lack of railings is the very definition of NSFW