before it all went pear shaped

seven minutes in hell where you beat the shit out of each other. in a closet

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY FALSE BUTTONS I TRIED TO PRESS

This is the reason we dunk screenshots in water

today i learned that the finnish word for ‘hazardous waste’ is ongelmajäte, which can also translate as ‘problematic garbage’ and my roommate and i immediately agreed this is a word that belongs on tumblr.

Your fave is ongelmajäte

in german it’s Sondermüll which means special trash and that too belongs on tumblr

One man’s ongelmajäte is another man’s sondermüll.

Today round ass puppy revealed to me, exhausted, at the end of my rope, that her training wasn't working not because she didn't understand, she did, she did, but instead because treats, chicken, turkey and pork apparently weren't enough motivation. She began obeying every word with startling accuracy as soon as she was offered something else. Doing backflips and stunts with pyrotechnics as prompted for the promise of a pea. A pea. She's a dog. A pea. A pea. A pea. I have to carry peas around now. On my person. Personal peas. 🫛 peas

i miss him (fictional character that i can rewatch or reread at any time i want)

how many hands you got

two? don’t see how that’s relevant

that’s still four people

will smith isn’t gay. he has a wife and three beautiful, talented children

I can’t believe this post predicted the live action Aladdin genie

If we lose tumblr how will we ever replace these posts in which every reply feels like a punch in the face

my best friend linen my brother in arms cotton my partner wool my beautiful sister silk

our sick deranged enemy polyester....

the demon lord, prince of lies, "Vegan Leather"...

anyone ever sit and think about how silver is the only character in black sails who falls in love with a person who will never ever ever compromise their vision to save their loved ones. I’m talking about madi obviously because even flint admitted that if there was a gun to thomas’s head he would have sacrificed anything to save him. over the course of the show we see a LOT of characters forced to choose between their loved ones or their ideals/goals/whatever you want to call it and even when they do choose the latter, nine times out of ten in their minds they see what they’re doing as an act of love, protecting the other person from themselves, securing a future for the both of them, insert justification here… and we often see that character regretting their choice (flint for killing gates, jack for kicking anne off the crew) and sometimes even wishing they could take it back (max for betraying anne and jack, rogers for getting eleanor killed, etc). madi is the ONLY character who 100% would not hesitate to choose the future she wants to build over anything and anyone else and also wouldn’t regret that choice afterwards, not because she doesn’t love them and wouldn’t grieve for them but because she believes in that future so strongly. and that’s who John “Abandonment Issues and Negative Self-Esteem” Silver falls in love with. when I say this show is a greek tragedy I mean it