this is the restrained version of me. i could be much worse.
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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this is the restrained version of me. i could be much worse.

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READER BEWEADER YOUâRE IN FOR A SCEADER
You see guys this is why context is important

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does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person
wow
apple blossomed trees / roots with the birds
the whole club was looking at worms
iâm losing my mind
STOP REBLOGGING THIS my phone is glitching an astronomical amount and I immediately knew the culprit was one of my tumblr posts gaining traction
oh
GROOVE WITH ME BABY
Ya gotta have
â¨âď¸ SOUL âď¸â¨
DONT STOP ME NOW!
The live-TV interpreter who said "Sag mal, wie lange wollt ihr bei dem ScheiĂ bleiben?!" has made a statement. I admire him hugely for not apologizing for what he said, or even technically retracting it, at any point in this statement. Instead, he takes the opportunity to make a jab at Trump's inability to put a reasonable sentence together:
Jetzt reagiert auch Dolmetscher Frank Deja, der fĂźr den Fauxpas gesorgt hatte. "Ich war Ăźberzeugt, ich hätte mich stumm geschaltet. Ich habe aber im Eifer des Gefechts die falsche Taste gedrĂźckt. Wir haben als Dolmetscher sogenannte Räusper-Tasten, mit denen wir uns stummschalten kĂśnnen. Dann geht das eben nicht Ăźber den Sender â und meine Aussage sollte natĂźrlich auch nicht Ăźber den Sender gehen", erklärt er "n-tv". Seinen Zwischenruf solle man nicht als politisches Statement deuten. "Nein, das wäre ganz verfehlt. Die politischen Inhalte sind nicht das Problem", meint Deja und fĂźgt hinzu: "Ich dolmetsche ständig Leute, mit deren politischen Inhalten ich nicht einverstanden bin. Das Problem bei Trump war, dass er auf einmal anfing, frei zu assoziieren oder dreimal hintereinander dasselbe zu sagen. Diesen wirren GedankensprĂźngen zu folgen, ist die Schwierigkeit beim Dolmetschen." Er erklärt: "Wenn ein Redner mit geordneten Gedanken redet, dann kann man, sobald der Satz angefangen hat, schon ungefähr erahnen, wie es weitergeht. Man kann auf dieser Welle weiter surfen. Aber bei Trump ist das unmĂśglich."
(source)
I didn't think I'd have the energy to make a translation, but what the heck, I guess I will.
Background for the non-Germans: a German professional interpreter was live-interpreting the TV broadcast of the Trump inauguration when he suddenly broke off in the middle of his interpreting and said loudly, "Tell me, how long do we have to watch this shit?!"
Of course they immediately cut his mic after that, but it was too late :D
Anyway here's my rough translation of the article excerpt above:
Interpreter Frank Deja, who committed this faux pas, has now made a statement. "I could have sworn I'd muted myself. However, in the heat of the moment, it appears I pressed the wrong button. We interpreters have what's known as a 'cough cut' button on the interpreter console, which we can use to briefly mute ourselves. Then, whatever we say next doesn't get broadcasted â and obviously that sentence wasn't supposed to be broadcasted," he explained to n-tv. His exclamation is not intended to be understood as a political statement. "No, that's not it at all. The political content is not the problem," says Deja, adding, "I often interpret for people whose politics I don't agree with. The problem with Trump was that he suddenly started free-associating or saying the same thing three times in a row. Following these incoherent mental leaps is quite a challenge for an interpreter." He explains: "When a speaker presents their thoughts in an organized way, the interpreter can more or less guess where each new sentence is going as soon as it's begun. You can surf that wave. But with Trump, this is impossible."
âmy father is a boy and my mother is a girl so iâm mixedâ is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6â5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat
comedians can only dream of writing something this funny

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I started using Head and Shoulders ten years ago for itchy scalp and dandruff, and then for ten years I have not had itchy scalp and dandruff, so I thought âwhy do I still buy shampoo to combat itchy scalp and dandruff when I do not have itchy scalp and dandruff,â so I stopped buying the shampoo for itchy scalp and dandruff and can you guess I have now? Can you predict what currently afflicts me? Itâs alright if you canât because apparently I fuckin couldnât either
Cutting something out of your life because you think you donât need it any more only to realize that it was in fact working as intended and preventing a problem that will return should you stop doing this is a good experiment to run periodically with something small like dandruff shampoo, lest you start to think it would be a good idea to do this with like letâs say public health and the social safety net and vaccines
I had a liver transplant when I was 14 and like six months later I was chatting with my surgeon and he said âthereâs gonna come a time, probably when youâre a teenager, where youâre gonna think, âI feel great, why am I still taking all this medication? I havenât needed it in years.â and youâre gonna want to stop taking all this medication. Guess whatâs gonna happen then? Youâre gonna go into rejection and your liver is gonna start failing, and youâre gonna be dying again, and weâre gonna have to find you another liver. So donât do that.â And I said âwhy the fuck would anyone do that?â and he said âpeople are stupid.â
every once in a while when I get annoyed by a pharmacy or donât wanna get out of bed to do my drugs I think âugh, this is dumb, why do I do this?â and that conversation slams into me like a truck and I remember that I am, in fact, stupid
#you are not immune to the recency bias(via@arrows-for-pens)
Every person on earth needs to read this post. It will make peopleâs lives a lot better and lessen the crises everyone faces in day-to-day lives.
I reblog this every time I see it because I am not immune to the recency bias
EvanEdinger showing up on a lateral podcast I'm listening to in 2026 is like, whiplash to 2014... goodness
the secret to organising any kind of trip with your friends is to become the benevolent dictator. do NOT wait for everyone to provide a consensus on things before you book anything. do it and then ask for feedback after. do not ask people what they would like to do just tell them what is happening and let them all nod along like the sheep they are. this is the ONLY way to coordinate a group of adults in their 20s/30s
I didnât realize there were so many people getting destroyed by mattresses đ
I love these so much.
ready for what the next week brings...

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Meanwhile, via Bluesky...
And here is the resulting image. There is at least Someone in the U.K. government who is actually doing their job, and it is Chief Mouser to the Cabinet, Larry the Cat.
Source
Re-creating my first webcomic from 12 years ago, "Hair Expectations vs Reality."
I can't help but feel all kinds of emotions after re-visiting the original comic: the one that started it all. A lot has changed since then, and I feel so fortunate to still create art and tell stories for a living. Thanks for your support, and sticking around for so long â¤ď¸
Check out the other versions:
2014 (OG)
2020 (6 year anniversary)