bring me luck

Just tried to play an ancient flute and it started filling the room with this awful miasma that wont go away

ah shit they're gaining on us. we gotta jettison some weight. throw all those stolen boomerangs out we don't need em

On it, boss!

Bad news, boss!

drawings are secretly the enemy because they start off very nice and unassuming but then when they're about 80% done they start emanating a malevolent aura that makes finishing them the scariest activity you can imagine

like many people have said this better than me but no it IS odd that we've come to think of potatoes as so quintessentially european that their presence in historical fantasy where they're anachronistic doesn't jar. and yes people are trying to have the trappings of post-colonial europe without engaging w the icky colonialism part and yes people are neglecting to imagine what a european cuisine without potatoes would be like.

im fully in favour of 'let people have fun w their fantasy world' but is considering how the potatoes got there in the absence of colonialism not a fun exercise? maybe every year the dragon riders go on a great transatlantic potato pilgrimage

i wanna see more stories with a time skip epilogue where at least one character has clearly transed their gender and it isnt really remarked upon. bonus if none of them were remotely hinted to be trans until that moment because i think it'd be funny to watch a fandom react to that. your blorbo's happily ever after involves being a woman. dont worry about it.

will never not be mad about gig economy apps making a 4 star rating mean “unacceptable quality”

one cute detail about murderbot is that its always running calculations on how likely an event is to happen. its always commenting on the statistical likelihood of something. and yet. it still thinks “but what if theres a space monster, like in my shows”

I asked my kids if they’d prefer a secret garden or a secret library and my son shook his head and was like “I don’t trust the secret gardeners and librarians”

The kids are right Jazz

and honestly it's just fucking insane that every time we try to talk about harm to children in particular we have to talk circles around the fact that these things are very, very overwhelmingly done by parents/family members/teachers/religious leaders/known and trusted adults in a position of power over a child, to the extent that many people's suggested solution to child abuse is "give the people most likely to abuse a child EVEN MORE strangling legal and material power over the kid"

you're not supposed to actually address who is abusing children and what can be done to give those children recourse and the ability to leave abusive situations because nobody actually gives a shit about child abuse beyond the familial property rights violation it represents to them and the cudgel against minorities which it can be turned into

always funny to remember darth vader is anakin skywalker. the adrenaline junkie chucklefuck who used to dive head first out of speeders and built a pod racer in his yard when he was like six is now upper-middle management for the evil empire. half of his appearances in the original trilogy are Meetings. vader spends like 80% of his time dealing with bureaucratic bullshit. status updates. team meetings. holo-Zooms. budget rundowns. anakin betrayed the jedi and caused the fall of the republic and his punishment is being CC'd on every email forever. and you know what. he would hate that. the punishment fits the criminal

immortality as theft (you have to steal life from something else) immortality as parasitism (there is something else inside You that is keeping you alive and you become less of yourself more and more the longer it stays in you) immortality as violence (everything is trying to kill you because everything is supposed to die and the universe will always try to find a way to right the wrong that is You) you understand