yippee im gay motherfucker

I shoved a nerd in my locker. so nobody steals my precious nerd

Trying to escape military service like: "Poison Seller, I require your weakest poisons."

it's actually so amazing she helped save the lives of the honorable men who did not wish to fight, while killing the most vile men, that is so fucking based

thinking abt the time i was hanging out w some friends in public and an older lady came up to us and was like "do u know who jill stein is?" and we were like well we've heard of her why and she was like "well she's a member of the green party she's running for president and unlike trump and biden she opposes the genocide in palestine" and we were all like. well fuck at least someone running does. and she gave us flyers and stuff and went on her way. And later that day i googled jill stein and i'm very faceblind so i might be wrong but im like 95% sure that was jill stein herself

thinking about this again. we discussed this at the table the next day and the consensus was that she was ABSOLUTELY jill stein which is so so funny to me

_____ ______ __ ____: ____ _ _____ _____ ____ ____ __ ___ ____ _ ___ __ __________ ___ _____ ___ __ ____ ____ __ _ ______ ___ "___" ___ _____ ____ _______ _____ __ _ ______ ___ _______

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As an adult you dont remember how badly scraped knees hurt. Never yell at a child over crying because of it. I scraped mine 8 hours ago and i still could cry RIGHT NOW

a lot has been said about how racist it is to treat the australian wilderness as some evil wasteland death world, but it should be noted it's also very hypocritical of americans to pretend australia has a monopoly on dangerous wildlife

"australia has spiders and snakes and wild dogs!" girl we have all that too. we're a country with multiple species of bear, get real.

asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room