ᴢᴏʀᴏʟᴏɢɪᴇs™

Children aged 36-48 report their lives as “better than nothing I guess.”

The science behind THC + alcohol as a combination is literally soo interesting because it basically causes the crimson red duckling in your body to confront the serpent in the bronze vessel of your heart. Basically you feel good because the duckling is able to eat the harmonious seeds stored within the vessel and transfer these positive energies into your body. You can have bad highs when this happens if the duckling awakens the serpent and it bites the duckling. The interesting part is when you ingest alcohol after THC because it floods the vessel and causes the serpent to fall into a deep sleep. The duckling never gets attacked by the serpent when this happens because it is unconscious and the duckling is actually able to get fat from the harmonious seed, which causes an enjoyable sensation.

the circus is empty, all of the monkeys are here

[lawyer voice] mothers and fuckers of the jury-

DO YOU KNOW HOW OFTEN I THINK ABOUT THIS POST??? IM IN LAW SCHOOL THIS POST IS GOING TO RUIN MY LIFE

reblog to ruin a law student’s life

when you see something that needs to be done and you think “someone should take care of that” just remember that you’re someone

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

this straw? oh, she’s my last