Procrastinato

i would've fucked so hard as a court jester in ye olde i would've jangled my balls and done a little dance and sang my silly tunes i'd be so good at my job. alas i have to be on tumblr instead which is like a poor imitation of it

bells. i meant bells

don’t do this to me

de una forma una mini pimer es como una cinturonga …

dear god, it lives still

Save the date folks, Knife-Wielding Tentacle’s second birthday is November 16th.

HAPPY SECOND BIRTHDAY, KNIFE-WIELDING TENTACLE!

Of course he’s a Scorpio

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Happy 5th birthday

Tell me Will

CIS PEOPLE ARE SO UNREAL BRO……..i made a “im epic and sexy and my meat is huge” joke to one of my cis friends and she just said “well youre trans so you dont HAVE meat” like ok….first of all its a joke and second of all its a joke

i hate it tho like other cis girls can say “suck my dick” as a joke and they dont have to specify that its a joke and that they dont actually have a dick but the moment i, a trans person, want to make a joke about it then it becomes a whole thing about how i dont REALLY have meat and i actually have a pussy like ok.

honestly the fact that other trans ppl are rbing/saying that theyve had a similar experience makes me so sad i hate cis ppl

It’s the transphobia.

It costs you literally nothing to leave service dogs the fuck alone.

yall. this isn’t a joke. if i can tell a 5 yr old “my dog is working, please let her be” and they understand then you can too. those dogs ARE working. they have a job to do. and when we say ‘leave them alone’ that includes making faces at them and baby talking them. literally act like they are just someone’s bag or something. if you distract them they could fail to alert their owner to a seizure or blood sugar issue or allergen. you are literally jeopardizing someone’s life bc you can’t have basic decency, respect, and self control.

SAY IT LOUDER

am I allowed to tell the person I’m proud of the dog? Or should I just not bring up the dog?

Ignore the dog. Do not mention the dog.

Would you walk up to a stranger and be like “Oh damn your wheelchair is doing such a hecking good job being a wheelchair you go lil buddy!” no? then don’t do it to service animals that are clearly wearing their vest/collar/harness whatever it is that marks them as service animals

Question: I know service dogs are for a variety of maladies (I hope that’s not offensive, if so plz correct me) so is it wrong to even go up to the person and calmly tell them their dog is cute and ask them to give them a pet for me later when they’re off the clock? Without actually giving the dog attention?

[ID: A white stick figure on a black background. Orange text says “that’s a human person”]

people love talking to my dog or asking questions while we’re in line and therefore can’t just leave.  if we’re in line chances are I feel terrible, he’s doing his job and I’m trying not to fall on the floor I do not have the time or energy to answer questions.  he knows he’s a good boy and that he’s very smart.  I know he’s doing a good job.  I should not have to worry about people petting him when I’m having tachycardia and actively need him to do his job.  just leave us and our dofs alone

Ableds: But I don’t want to.

I’ve mentioned this before, but my parents introduced a system where if they tell you to do something and there’s a reason you can’t do it, you can ask “May I appeal,” and they’ll listen to whatever new information you have to present and either revise their command or tell you to do it anyway. This serves a few purposes: first, it’s really funny to hear a four-year-old use legal jargon. Second, having a system in place for protest that isn’t whining, complaining, or outright disobedience makes things easier for the parents. Third, it fosters an environment of mutual respect. The child knows that his reasoning is taken into consideration when the parents’ decision is made, and the parent knows that the child may have legitimate reasons for not obeying a command, while still reserving the right to the final decision.

I do remember telling a teacher that her request was “out of her jurisdiction” in kindergarten so it can backfire just FYI

so did you lay in bed blasting fireflies by owl city as a kid staring up at the ceiling while imagining running away to a happier place bc you grew up on fairy tales and make believe stories since you didnt really have the best social skills due to undiagnosed neurodivergency and thus didnt have a lot of friends so you spent all that extra time you had induldging in fictional stories and then grew up believing maybe one day youd get to go on a magical adventure like those stories had so youd spent so much time just longing for an escape and to go somewhere you understood bc you didnt understand people but you did understand all those stories you read or are you normal

Either neurodivergent people need to stop being so relatable or I need to go to the doctor

Can i not be called out first thing in the morning?