FURNACE HEART

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

sex position: you, sitting on your throne. me, standing behind you, resting my arm on the back of your throne and sniling so sneetly at your ministers like i have any right to be there

in the dungeon you will have to face a monster with the nose of a tiger, the teeth of a tiger, the ears of a tiger the eyes of a tiger , the cheeks of a tiger , the neck of a tiger, the torso of a tiger, the arms of a tiger, the paws of a tiger, the belly of a tiger the back of a tiger, the the legs of a tiger, the claws of a tiger, the ankles of a tiger, the tail of the tiger, the mind of a tiger, and the power of a tiger

I don’t think it’s possible to go through your 20s without considering at least once to join a monastery

i have brought peace [citation needed], freedom [citation needed], justice [citation needed], and security [citation needed] to my [citation needed] new empire

hey quick PSA but “reading before bed to wind down” only works if you’re normal about books btw. if you aren’t you are going to end up awake at 2:52am after finishing the whole book just trust me on this one