xyloid-devices @xyloid-devices - Tumblr Blog

man sometimes friendship really is just "I saw this and knew it would give you psychic damage. please respond with agony" and then they do. and it's great

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animentality

achievement-hunter

textandimageenjoyer

lokaror

Pissing off elves by claiming i fought in wars their empire waged 1000's of years ago when im clearly a regular human

animentality

whyenn-reader

''what if you regret it'' then you will expirience regret - a normal and unavoidable part of the human expirience.

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f4ngbu2t

"You're too hairy"

Meat too succulent

Lobster too buttery

#i've had men tell me this #also #yesterday at the gay pride of my city i got told unprovoked that my hairiness made me too sexy #and that it was scaring the hoes because they were too afraid to fumble me #i did have my shirt wide open from hours of dancing so to be fair it was right in front of their salad #but i guess hooray?

maykitz

people throw in "not trying to be rude" at the end of the rudest thing you've ever heard as if they're trying to go "no homo" after sucking the balls too

haydiroket

sUpErReAdY ✓

transpigeon

the way she says whataburger is so satisfying

thundergrace

You just KNOW they talking about anime.

radicalmuscle-deactivated-2019

She’s wearing a Naruto shirt, his jacket has the Leaf Village symbol on the sleeve.

They’re definitely talking about anime (probably Naruto).

egberts

my fave part is that they’re at a coach fashion show

ferretteeth

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thethirdromana

The worst types of cookbook:

The Ottolenghi - it is vital that you use 1g of this very expensive ingredient. It comes from a 500g bag with a one-week shelf life.

The time machine - 15-minute recipe! First, leave to marinate overnight...

The dishwasher - one-pot recipe! Now decant your ingredients and wipe out your pot. And again. And again. And again.

The optimist - cook the onions until caramelised (2 minutes).

The kindergarten teacher - get one nommable little tree of broccoli and bosh that into boiling water. Delish!

The brand names only - ingredients: Ritz crackers, Philadelphia cheese, Cool Whip, orange Jell-o...

The 1950s palate - use one (1) clove of garlic and a small pinch of chili flakes (omit if preferred).

The why bother with a cookbook - to make beans on toast, gently heat a tin of beans and put on top of freshly buttered toast.

targetedknowledge

ewoly5

evilvillain123456789

a pit of dread forms in your stomach as you parse my "evil baby on board" decal and realize you have a moral duty to rear end my vehicle as hard as you can

stroebe2

anxeious

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

prima02

hey

frankkingcole

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