always stressed

you have to remember it's always always worse on twitter

A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.

This is the most important addition to the sandwich discourse I have ever read.

is that song actually character-coded or is your brain a character-shaped hammer looking for lyrics to nail down somewhere

some people like to get mad at disability benefits because they think its unfair people who dont work get a payout from the government while they have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week. but if you tell them "yeah that sucks i think you should also get a universal allowance and not have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week" thats apparently the wrong answer.

change does not come from a place of comfort

I find pennies and nickels in my couch all the time, so I don’t know what you are talking about

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

talking like point-and-click game narration to the bugs in my room

you can't get out that way!

that's not very helpful.

maybe the open window will help.

try the open window instead.

murder suicide is awesome to me bc its like annnnnd im coming with you

imagine this heat and you roll over in bed an there’s some cunt there next to you. bruv id be inconsolable

@evilwizard

Sometimes a guy in a fanfiction has the ability to read someone's gaze with the same level of detail a wine taster can taste the wine

"He glared at him with anger in his eyes, but behind that longing and sorrow over things left unsaid, a subtle but desperate yearning for things to be different, and with just a hint of roasted nuts right at the end."

we've all heard about the male gaze in media, but we've yet to explore the equally important sommelier gaze

the only fun addition to this post