Witch Bitch 667

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app

broooo did you seriously disturb my eternal rest & bring me back to this mortal coil just because my ancient enemy the eternal night has returned? after i sealed it away and everything? which one of you tampered with my binding runes 🙄

where's my useless apprentice i TOLD him it was going to be the duty of the next generation to not repeat the mistakes of those before them and to make this world bet- oh my apprentice goes by her now? you're telling me she's right in front of me! my dear i'm so sorry i didn't know. you look so much more happier and more confident than the bumbling, shy apprentice i once knew. im so proud of you. were you the one who tampered with my fucking runes

Indigenous peoples of the great plains should've never told white people about tornadoes. "I don't know man that shit never happened before you showed up"

I’M RIGHT BEHIND YOU

Thank you Evil Wizard, it’s good to know someone has our backs

IN A SCARY WAY

every forest is enchanted btw. stop being stupid and look with your eyes

sexually repressed people be like “i have an ancient evil stirring within me. no one can know” and its literally just craving intimacy

Stop getting mad at me I raise undead when im in distress

choosing to ignore my weirdly symbolic dream because i have a lot going on rn already

tarot reader: draws the tower me: thats bad isnt it tarot reader: draws the tower again me: uh oh tarot reader: draws boeing 767