here comes the pun (doo doo doo doo)

Most mammals have, compared to humans, an elongated jaw. So a little tiny bump of a mammary gland is fine, just enough to get the nostrils away from the teat, and the young can freely breathe while nursing. However, as humans started using fire more and more to cook food - which softened it up, rendering powerful jaws less necessary - their jaws began to shorten, resulting in the development of the chin and other unique facial structures as the face flattened out.

This, of course, meant that babies could suffocate while nursing, which would obviously be bad. But what if... what if nipple further from chest? Bigger bump, so baby's nose have spot to go that isn't directly into mommy's chest? Oh, turns out that works! Of course, as more and more fat stores become dedicated to growing that breast mound to keep baby from suffocating, it becomes harder and harder for the mother to reabsorb that tissue when not nursing (as many other mammals do), so they just... don't. Knockon effects from there, and bam. Tiddies.

If anyone is ever training you to replace them in a position and tells you 'its an easy job I don't do much' what this means is that you are about to spend six months to a year catching up on all the stuff they didn't do and sorting out the stuff they did poorly.

stenographer: well her bio says she/her...

me: better play it safe anyway [writes "it"]

the ghost of marie curie: [appears out of thin air] ivy... you're the first person to ever correctly gender me in a hundred and eighty-two years. from the bottom of my cold dead heart, thank you.

me: [dies of radiation poisoning]

Image description: A screenshot of the symptoms of 'factitious disorder,' from the Mayo Clinic. The symptoms are listed below alongside my discussion of them.

This is the 'condition' that used to be known as Munchausen's.

I am not claiming that nobody ever fakes being sick. But it is vanishingly rare compared to the number of people who ARE sick, but doctors refuse to take it seriously.

Let's take a look at some of these. How can they tell if the medical problems are 'clever and convincing' or just... real, if it's one of the hundreds of conditions that don't show up in a clean cut way on imaging or labs ?

'Deep knowledge of medical terms and diseases' is much more commonly a symptom of being forced to do your own research because doctors refuse to help you figure out what's going on. I have deep knowledge of certain medical terms and diseases. Wish I didn't have to.

'Vague or inconsistent symptoms' - you mean like those that occur in, once again, the many conditions doctors like to ignore and dismiss because clear objective diagnostic measures don't exist yet? Like they did with multiple sclerosis before they invented the MRI?

'Conditions that get worse for no clear reason' - sometimes the reason is pretty clear! Medical neglect! And many conditions worsen for no obvious reason. Do they not understand the concepts of progressive,' 'degenerative', or 'relapsing-remitting'?

'Seeking treatment from many healthcare professionals' - it's almost like if a doctor dismisses your symptoms or refuses treatment you might need to look for another?

'Not wanting healthcare professionals to talk to family or friends' - Many chronically ill people live in abusive situations and/or with people who do not believe they are sick.

'Staying in the hospital a lot' - Because you're sick and no one will provide appropriate treatment outpatient. Because they don't believe you. So it escalates to hospital severity.

'Desire for frequent testing or risky surgeries and procedures' - It's almost like people want to find out what's wrong with them? And get treatment for it even if it has risks?

'Many surgical scars or evidence of many procedures' - Sure yeah let's just demonize people for having had medical care. Alright.

'Having few visitors when in the hospital' - Yeah, definitely if a chronically ill person experiences social isolation or abandonment they must be faking. We definitely don't live in a culture that isolates sick people.

'Arguing with healthcare professionals and staff' - And this is the one that inspired my addition to this post. G-d forbid we know anything about our bodies or advocate for ourselves.

Someone I care about very much was recently 'diagnosed' with this despite massive evidence of life threatening, untreated medical conditions. This diagnosis can kill people.