Germ//19//he/they

Hello, Mr. J. In front of you is a paper slide door. You have one hour to resist the urge to crinkle it. Fail and you will receive the funny face penalty.

some bitch is scared for her life

The point of officially naming a pet is not to actually use that name but to have a baseline from which to come up with every conceivable nickname to call them instead.

It’s literally dark by 4pm. Do you think that’s good for me? Do you think I am loving this

people who think cis is an acronym crack me up

we can forgive you for not knowing what cishet is but cargo shorts? that is too far

wait… what does trans stand for then?

They stand for each other and for a world without fear

Flavoracle definitely has a third eye and it’s wide open honey

If I’ve learned anything from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, it’s that it is the one show where quotes are more normal and sane out of context than in context.

The “Can I offer you a nice egg in this trying time?” quote is bookended by Charlie violently spewing blood on a date

What about regular plain ol bi men what about bi men that wear t-shirts and pants what about bi men that say "don't mind if i do"

i do not think that’s an officially-sanctioned wizard orb

well you’re one to talk

I SUMMON KETAMINE APE

THATS NOT LEGAL

KILL MAIM EVISCERATE  DESTROY DECIMATE

cats r like Omg what the hell is this foreign object *sniff sniff sniff* ahhh ... makes sense now

Alternate ending: *smack smack smack*

you have to understand kittens will be tiny sometimes and that is because they are small

growing up in a small town