Hello!

which is complicated by the fact that ilya takes one look at rose and shane at the bar (rose's arm looped through shane's in what ilya doesn't know is just a friends move) and BOOKS IT so he doesn't have to see this

and then proceeds to avoid them at EVERY fucking turn

this all terminates into rose going "fuck it I'm a true bro and I'm making this happen so help me GOD" and managing to arrange locking them in a closet together (which is. so funny. but this is not the time to point out the punchline.) (she'll save it.) so ilya can't run away.

and it's very sweet and they have their moment of honesty and yay back to ilya's room now fo-

the-the door is locked.

because it turns out that rose got a LITTLE too enthusiastic in locking it after her plan worked PERFECTLY and now something in the mechanism is broken.

There's one name though, one that Ilya pulls out when he wants Shane's attention, when he feels fond but knows Shane is in that mood that won't let Ilya be gentle with him. Shanya.

It's the closest thing to a Russian diminutive Ilya has come up with, and when he realizes it's one of the only names he can get away with on public, boy does he take advantage of it.

The Centaurs notice. Of course they do. They notice how Shane's jaw clenches when they call him "Holly" or "Holzy". They notice, and some guess, just how many comments, how many "jokes" the Metros had to make to get Shane to react like that to what should be an affectionate nickname.

And so, when Ilya starts calling him Shanya in practice, and Shane gets this not-quite smile in his face, the rest of the team catches on quickly.

Surprisingly, its Luca who tries it first, the vowels clear and precise just like Ilya does it. Teasing, but fond with it. Shane starts a little, and they all hold their breaths, subtly waiting for the downturn of Shane's mouth, the tightening of his shoulders. And then Shane rolls his eyes upwards, that half smile that talks of fond exasperation, and everyone sighs in relief. It's fair game after that.

"Damn Shanya, what a fucking shot!"

"Shanya, how the hell did you manage that?"

"There anymore water, Shanya?"

"You okay, Shanya?"

step 1

step 2

step 3

and ilya wanders over and joins the conversation and starts?? recommending?? blogs??? "nut free natalie has really good plain vanilla. it does go kind of flat, though, i think because of sea level? but if you add 1/2 tsp more baking soda and-"

and the WAGs are all??? since when??? does roz know this??? and word gets around because he is a good captain and checks in on the family and ends up chit chatting about allergies and making suggestions based on what he's been researching since he's had a few months of this now and everyone is??? d-does roz?? have allergies? no?? they've SEEN HIM eating this stuff???

and then he moves to ottawa and someone has a (wildly incorrect lmao) lightbulb moment of "oh my GOD!!! ROZANOV HAS A KID WITH ALLERGIES!" they know about montreal jane and figured he was moving up to ottawa to be closer to her anyway, and a kid being in the picture (especially a kid who might have medical needs a la food allergies) would absolutely make sense for him suddenly moving up there after years. and some of the team is a little hurt he wouldn't say anything, but he does get some ruthless press and jane seems really private so maybe?? it's her request???

and naturally gossip flows a little to the point that it makes it to the ottawa team, and i mean? yeah? makes sense? roz is so rigorous about allergies and keeping his place allergy free? maybe the kid and jane come on the weekends or something?? or maybe it's like a week on week off situation??

and eventually shane is down in boston playing and a member of montreal is friends with someone on boston, so the gossip gets passed along that roz left boston to move up to ottawa to be with jane and their kid. and NATURALLY this becomes THE topic in the locker room that evening afterwards. and shane coming back from press hears this and is??? what?? the fuck are you talking about???

"yeah, it's what smythe on the boston team said. apparently roz moved up because their kid is sick or something?? no one's sure."

shane that night texts ilya, "apparently?? we have a kid together??"

I never really realised how much difference it makes until I went to England and realised that here the change of seasons is an obvious, visible, physical change in the world. Like, everything REALLY IS orange and foggy in autumn! In spring there are flowers EVERYWHERE, so much more than any other season, and the trees really do have all blossom and no leaves. Even if it doesn't snow, in winter there's frost all the time and the trees are bare and the sky is visibly greyer all the time. You don't need to be told "this date is the first day of spring", you can SEE IT (although this is getting way messier and less precise due to climate change).

By contrast, most places in Australia the seasons we're taught feel like arbitrary categories - and is it any surprise considering they're colonial constructs? Orange-leaved autumn and blossom-covered spring is a cartoon stereotype with no relevance on a continent where ALL NATIVE TREES ARE EVERGREEN!! Snowy winters are a joke in the desert, and even sunny summers don't ring particularly true considering that much of the country is in the tropics, where summer means monsoons - not that I've ever seen the concept that WE HAVE A MONSOON SEASON taught at an Australian school.

the 4 season model as you and i know it is a european invention, though 4 season models aren't unique to europe! most notably china has the same type of season subdivision.

🏛️The Twelve Olympians🏛️

🏛️The Twelve Olympians🏛️