The Gravitational Force of Yuri

pulling yourself up by your strap-on or whatever they say

and what if I told you nine was less afraid of love than ten. what then.

for a moment i lived in a beautiful world where doctor who didn’t exist and this was simply a seven-ate-nine joke too layered for me to understand

one of my favorite glados gags is she keeps pretending she went places. she's like i went outside today. girl you did not go anywhere.

big pharma will try to sell u $20 cold medicine like spicy ramen doesnt cost like a dollar a pack and orgasms are free

big chemist will try to sell you £20 paracetamol like beans dont cost like a quid a can and havin a wank costs fock all

I'm thinking of Symphony of the Sixth Blast Furnace by Evgeny Sedukhin again...

tumblr version of "you sir have won the internet. have an updoot"

man come on

just saw a "only one bed" fic with the major character death warning

#i guess that's one way to solve that problem

“This bed ain’t big enough for the both of us.”

Me, bleeding profusely from a missing leg as I’m being dragged onto the beach: THIS WAS A STATISTICALLY UNLIKELY OCCASION, IF THE SHARK WANTED ME DEAD I WOULD BE DEAD. SHARKS ARE IMPORTANT FOR THEIR ECOSYSTEMS I DO NOT CONDONE ANY ATTEMPTS TO HUNT THIS SHARK

if an animal kills me, that was on ME. it caught ME slackin. let it eat me

In my opinion it's a lot more healthy to be able to own that you dislike someone for petty reasons than to do all kinds of mental gymnastics to make everyone you don't really vibe with out to be a bad person actually

my ideal existence is not knowing about the oscars or the super bowl or any of that horseshit...I jerk off to clear running water and live off whatever wanders into my open mouth