Go Away

Gian Lorenzo Bernini

it would be NICE if we lived in a world where you had to actually respect someone to have sex with them but that is not actually the world we live in.

You can absolutely be a feminine man and I've no problem with that, but that's not really what a femboy is. There's a reason I hate the term, view it as one of the many fetishizing slurs against transfems, and get grossed out at how other TME queer folks seem to think it's the most wonderful term ever.

Straight men love femboys because they get to fuck a pretty thing that they don't have to respect the rights or even womanhood of! And to be a femboy, you have to be young, it's a label with an expiration date, and there's a reason for that! Easier to exploit!

-people take it more seriously when I say I’m scared or anxious, if I tell people who I’m not out to that I feel upset about not being able to have children, they don’t try to laugh it off anymore, they offer condolences instead.

-people seem to be a lot more willing to talk to me out of the blue, I used to go to clubs and have no random strangers talk to me and now I get spoken to a lot, not necessarily in a romantic context. This can be both a good or bad thing but I think it’s positive overall, especially when it happens in professional contexts I guess.

-people are just kinder to me, shopkeepers ask how my day is more, I get less scary looks, I haven’t been called a faggot or a tranny walking down the street in ages.

-the only one on this list that is bad is that Mormon and Catholic missionaries approach me much more often.

-I experience less sexual harassment every single day that I go outside.

This is weird to write out because a lot of it is in the minutia, like how people look at you and the tone they use, like ur a deadly beast escaped from the zoo, and I haven’t been dealing with that for a while, obviously I still get treated poorly as a woman, but the difference is pretty immense in my day to day life. Here’s what hasn’t changed that some people seem to think will have changed

-I suddenly experience sexual violence (I experience much less generally)

-doctors suddenly don’t take me seriously (it took me 8 years to get diagnosed with debilitating OCD that I was constantly bringing up, still an issue to the same degree)

-I suddenly experience sexism (the whole time I was out but not passing I was being treated like I was dumber, less creative, and less capable than the men in my life, while these feelings were being invalidated by other people in my life because I “wasn’t really experiencing sexism”)

It’s just absurd how some people think transgender women, or at least visibly transgender women, have some kind of privilege or leg up over cis women, or over other TME people, like I know some extremely lib middle aged people think transgender women even have privilege over cisgender men

You know what IS an important issue? Getting called a fucking birthday boy. They get all hands on deck about it. They will write VERY long posts about how important it is you not use it, and that anyone who does must be punished as severely as possible

There's only one explanation. The lives of trans women are so worthless to them, so fucking disposable, that a trans man getting invalidated is actually more important to them. That's how these people, who demand we view them as family and allies, who think we should be ready to die for them, view us.

yeah but I'm not a fucking weirdo to them about it. I have the basic respect for their internality required to understand that what for me is aspirational is not so for them, and may be actively uncomfortable or distressing for them

1) my transition has not been sufficiently feminizing and i still look enough like a man to appeal to him

2) he assumed i had a dick specifically and was referring to that

either way is pretty inappropriate. i did not want to be a man's transition goals.

yeah i have on occasion seen people of a variety of genders and envied the way their body developed and mine didn't. i don't think i've ever mentioned it. and as is above, dramatically more often for people aiming to present feminine as well (usually cis women). also as said above, i have never highlighted someone's gender-nonconforming traits as genderfucky unless they specifically told me to do so.

They want buckskin and face paint, drumming, songs in languages they can’t understand recorded for them but with English subtitles, of course. They want educated, well spoken, but not too smart. Christian, well behaved, never question. They want to learn the history of the people, but not the ones that are here now, waving signs in their faces, asking them for clean drinking water, asking them why their women are going missing, asking them why their land is being ruined.

They want fantastical stories of Indians that used to roam this land. They want my culture behind glass in a museum.

They want buckskin and face paint, drumming, songs in languages they can’t understand recorded for them but with English subtitles, of course. They want educated, well spoken, but not too smart. Christian, well behaved, never question. They want to learn the history of the people, but not the ones that are here now, waving signs in their faces, asking them for clean drinking water, asking them why their women are going missing, asking them why their land is being ruined.

They want fantastical stories of Indians that used to roam this land. They want my culture behind glass in a museum.

Ríhanna Kelver, a bartender and trans rights advocate in Laramie, has been charged with aggravated assault and possession of a deadly weapon with unlawful intent after a 13 September 2025 confrontation outside the Crowbar & Grill, whereshe worked. Kelver could be sentenced to up to 15 years in prison if convicted on both charges.

Despite Wyoming’s “Stand Your Ground” statute, which allows people to use reasonable force in moments of self defense, Kelver faces up to 15 years in prison for both charges, as well as up to $11,000 in fines, per Cowboy State Daily. Kelver faces an additional year and $1,000 fine for a charge of interference with a peace officer. [...]