doomed by the narrative? no, the narrative is doomed by me

evil therapist: to ground yourself, look around, name 5 things you can kill, and 4 things you can at least maim

I think that when you're overstimulated you should appear kind of grayed out and no one should be able to interact with you like a locked character in a video game

Hi for the love of god hello

god the horrible urge to vague post is eating me alive but i must

someone wronged me once

maybe if you bundled yourself up and went for a walk out in the cold then came back inside with rosy cheeks and cool skin and warmed yourself up with a nice warm cup of herbal tea with honey maybe then you'd calm down

I have been nothing but elusive and difficult to you and this is how you treat me

I used to get really bad nose bleeds but sometimes could feel when they were starting. One day in middle school this guy in geography class wouldn’t shut the fuck up about that conspiracy theory that Delaware doesn’t exist, so when I felt one coming on I loudly interrupted the rant our teacher was inexplicably allowing to derail the class by saying “if you don’t stop I’m gonna have an aneurism!” The guy of course just kept going so a second later a small torrent of blood gushed out of my head and, being a dramatic bitch, I collapsed face down onto my desk into a nice little puddle of blood. Anyway apparently outside of intense Roman Senate-esque debates, these stunts apparently induce panic attacks in educators and end up with you getting lectured about how traumatizing it is for your classmates when you “fake your death for dramatic effect”

I believe this falls into the "I don't think people should be punished for objectively funny crimes" category.

why did they start breeding busses to have flat faces. they can't breathe

thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

i really wish five hours of sleep was sufficient because going to bed at 2 and waking up at 7 would be heaven but the body keeps score