Milkshake Milkshade

the next day after exerting myself too much because i felt good for once

Empathy is the ability to mirror other people's emotions, while compassion is the ability to care about what other people need and want. You can have high empathy and low compassion and low empathy and high compassion, and tbh generally having too-high empathy fucks with your ability to practice compassion because you're overwhelmed when someone else has it bad.

I came across an interesting Reddit post where a Redditor was angry that their great uncle’s FindAGrave biography mentioned that their uncle had died in a domestic violence murder-suicide, killing his girlfriend (the mother of two young sons) and then taking his own life. The event happened decades ago but the sons and the grandchildren of the woman his great uncle killed could still be alive. It is common for newspaper article clippings and explanations of the decedent’s circumstances to be included in the FindAGrave entries of murderers, the descendants of murder victims seem to support this, additionally, there is an argument that this is important so that passersbys understand why certain graves are set apart and do not have flowers and do not feel undue sympathy. The person who edited the entry to describe the Redditor’s great uncle’s crimes was likely a local who remembered the act or a descendant of the woman who he killed but the Redditor was highly offended though the information was factual. I’m wondering how everyone feels about this.

I said this in the replies but I think it is important to say it here, genealogy work is not for the faint of heart. We’re all descended from/related to highly imperfect people, sometimes people who did things that are unequivocally evil. The answer to finding out that one of your ancestors or family members was a terrible person or did terrible things is not to scrub all record of those actions from existence, it is to disavow them and work to be a better person. An ego-driven desire to save face and whitewash your ancestors into being innocent people can make you complacent in what they did and shows you are more focused on the possible effects on your own image than horror/disgust at the action itself or a desire to distance yourself from the behavior.

I cant believe this tweet is how I find out

holy shit.

You're not really supposed to say it this way, because its considered crass, but here in the US children are culturally and legally considered essentially the property of their parents.