The Ugly Colors Of Your Ugly True Friends.

whenever i order food i get nervous that the doorbell will annoy my roommates so i turn it off temporarily and tell the delivery person to just knock. but then i get nervous i might not hear the knocking so i go sit by the front door a few minutes early to make sure i hear it. but then i get nervous that if i open the door too quickly the delivery driver will think it's weird that i was waiting there so i wait an additional 10-15 seconds before opening it and feign that i just came down the stairs. i am built normal and socially average.

Accidentally clicking on an AI assistant feels like clicking on a link that’s going to give you a virus.

they should make a version of socializing that doesn’t make you feel like you’re still the weird 12 year old kid that doesn’t know why she’s not normal like the other kids

I don’t even like Jimmy Kimmel’s unfunny ass but ABC firing him is so alarming. They’re coming for the mid white men. We’re toast.

doing my damnedest to free myself of the “just gotta get through this week” “only x more days til the weekend” mindset & learn to appreciate each day for whatever it is lest i be driven to madness

so what if tomorrows monday i have leftovers & maybe this week i will make soup. maybe ill see a cat. maybe each day will show me something worthwhile even if im tired & maybe i can enjoy it

if u are negative on this post im blocking u ! some of us are trying to get better

telling your online friends "wait there i'm coming" is funny regardless of the distance that you are from them. if they're within driving distance it has the humor of being a real possibility and if they're overseas it's funny because how are you getting there. especially if it's a limited time event. one of my personal favorites is saying i'm walking in their general direction

The Steven Universe fandom might be “cringe” and “bad” but imagine a fandom so bad that a bunch of fandom members had ran a scheme to say “if you pay us money, your blorbo will know you’re valid” and the fandom permanently split over a 95 paragraph callout post of these people.

guy who is stuck in a timeloop but is too socially anxious to bring it up to anybody or change their routine just in case it turns out they're mistaken. like yeah you're pretty sure that it's been november 3rd for two weeks now but idk maybe that's the depression talking. it's fine.

went on someone’s blog who didn’t post in over a year and their last post was about getting married. like your marriage is more important than posting on tumblr? grow up

Sometimes you gotta make yourself drink water and sit in direct sunlight, like some kind of wilted houseplant

“your rent should be a third of your income” well wouldn’t that be nice. wouldn’t it. lower the rent pussy

Casual observation from someone old enough to remember: in the year 2000 financial advice was that rent should be no more than 1/4 of your income.

“pillows expire after a year” “you need new shoes every 6 months” no thanks. even if that’s true it’s stupid i think i can sleep on a slightly deflated pillow

“This is what they took from you” and it’s a blonde family cooking barbecue in the suburbs? Brother you are racist and fascist over hot dogs? You know you can still do that. Also if you befriend other ethnicities, they will bring cool other food to the potluck. Stupid ass

What really ticks me off when talking about ai is when people are like "it's unavoidable" or "you'll have to learn to use it someday" or "its going to be part of the future" like no it's plenty avoidable actually if you have a spine stronger than a dandelion. You simply say "no" and continue to use your own goddamn brain.

It’s actually really important to me that people know that this is canon. Like, it sounds like shipping nonsense and exaggeration and fun memeing but it’s not. These are canon ships, and this is literally what happened. Sense8 fucking NO ONE did it like you baby