yoink!

court jester sucking the king silly right there on his throne, in full view of the guards

His stupid little hat jingling away

the king develops a pavlovian response to jingling bells

and remember… if you put the embankment outside the ditch, you’ve got yourself a henge!

I hate it when I set out to make a ring fort and accidentally make a henge. It's so frustrating.

It's definitely a problem with flatpack fortifications.

*weakly* f-femboy friday....... *my body goes slack and i fade from existence like obi-wan*

Oh my fucking god… They turned him into Pepsi

good morning kings let’s push this boulder

bad news about the boulder everyone

Good morning kings let’s push this boulder

*sound of an aluminum can being crushed*

Fucking awesome

im the guy who has to jack him off to keep him docile and to stop his thousand years blood lust and i totally agree. tight scrotum. small but powerful penis. circumcised.

Grandpappy is so far gone from dementia, he's in a constant state of stupor. But, show him a picture of Betty Boop and he's a young dog in heat again, all hootin and hollering! Oh grandpappy. Tomorrow I will finally take him out back and shoot him with a shotgun

most cringe part of public school was that time in 4th grade they made us melt down millions of dollars worth of gold and use it to construct various animal-headed idols which we then had to kneel before for 30 minutes everyday :\ 

good afternoon girl i’m in the atmosphere

help girl i drifted out to the vacuum of space

girl why i fucking froze