Viva la Pluto

The early years of Jules’ life would not be remembered as smooth or easy, forever bearing the weight of two fathers who couldn’t catch a break.

Julia was newly 18 months when Trinity Santos found them.

The eighth floor was far from ideal - everything about these past few years had been far from ideal - but it was safer than shelters. And Dennis could easily pick up and drop her off at the in-hospital nursery - which also provided meals and snacks throughout the day. It was the best he could make of their circumstances.

He had finally settled Jules’ down, cradling her, holding a bottle of stolen milk to her as she suckled sleepily. When he caught sight of Trinity from the corner of his eye, his body jolted in shock, nearly ruining his hard work.

The hushed conversation that followed was humiliating for Dennis, stumbling over an avoidance of where her other parent is. He was lucky that the day had been as shit as it had been otherwise Trinity might have kept pushing for answers. Instead, she heaved a sigh, moving to collect his things. Dennis began panicking, asked what the hell she was doing. She just replied “I’m not leaving you and Huckleberry junior up here. If you die, I couldn’t deal with the guilt” with an eye roll, offering up her spare room for the two of them.

Together, they collected the sparse belongings, and rode the bus back to her place.

A couple weeks later, Trinity bought Jules a car seat.

It was weird, having a permanent home again, not having to hide food, being able to sleep through the whole night without darting awake in fear that they'd be found. Jules was thriving in the new found safety as well. Dennis no longer had to feel bad about quieting her when she played or cried. Trinity seemed to breathe life into both of them.

He even ended up saving money, closing his PO box once he gave Andrew their new address.

Unfortunately, as he soon learned, Trinity was endlessly nosey.

Maybe it was a fuck up on his part, not telling her about the Oceanside of it all. He should have. But he didn't.

It all came out when the first letter arrived at their place. He was in the living room, lying on the rug whilst Jules used his body as a climbing frame having grown bored of her building blocks, whilst Trinity ran out to the store for some raspberries (Jules' current food fixation). The woman burst into the apartment, startling both Whitaker's with her shout of "Huckleberry!"

Dennis had fully sat up by the time Trinity came into the living room, holding the curious baby on his lap. She stood before them, glaring down at him, one hand on her hip, the other holding a stack of mail, waving it about, "Why the fuck do you have a letter from Richard J. Donavan Correctional Facility?!"

Dennis' face fell, and he hauled him and Jules up from the ground, reaching forward to snatch the letter from Trinity. Jules, getting increasingly more verbal now she had the freedom to be loud, noticed the letter and began a babbling "Da da da da."

The look Trinity sent him could have killed a weaker man. Probably would have killed him a few weeks ago before he built up an immunity. She was deadly still as she gritted out, "Huckleberry. Please do not tell me that this is a letter from Jules' other parent." At Dennis' silence, Trinity slapped his shoulder, "Dennis! What the fuck!"

Dennis adjusted Julia on his hip, gently pulling the blue envelope from where she was attempting to teeth on it. Trinity whacked his arm again, and he caught her wrist before she hit him a third time, slightly scrunching the letter up. “Trinity, please. Just sit down, let me read her this letter before she gets impatient, then I’ll tell you everything. I promise.”

Trinity gave a reluctant nod of acceptance then turned on her heel, stomping into the kitchen. And, just like they always did, Dennis snuggled up with Jules pressed against his chest, and he read aloud the careful words Andrew wrote for them. Once the letter was finished, Dennis put a sleepy Jules into her crib, pressing a quick kiss to her forehead, pressing the letter into his bedside drawer to lie with the others, before bracing himself for the confrontation with Trinity.

He found her in the kitchen, cleaning up heavy-handedly which reminded him painfully of his childhood. He fucked up.

"I'm sorry for not telling you. I just. I couldn't risk us losing this if you found out."

Trinity's movements stilled. She braced herself against the counter, back tense and a white-knuckle grip on the cloth she was using, letting out a terrifying sigh. "You really think I would do that to you? To her?"

Dennis sensed he fucked up. Again. "No. No! Of course not! It's just. We've been thrown out for less before, and, and she's so much better here, happier. I just. You never know, and I wasn't going to trust what I believed. I couldn't take that chance. I couldn't do that to her."

Trinity let out another sigh, and Dennis shifted, reaching up to scratch at his arm. "What did he do?"

He sighed. This was always where he lost people. "Just armed robbery."

Trinity whirled around, the cloth still in her hand dripping water in a neat arch as she spun, "'Just' armed robbery! What the fuck!"

"Okay, okay, maybe I shouldn't have said it like that! Alri-Alright, can we just sit down for a second and I'll explain this to you!"

She gave him a stiff nod, stalking out to the living room, throwing the wet cloth at his chest as she went. She remained silent, either out of respect or passive-aggressiveness, throughout his tale. He told her about a whirlwind romance that was perfect until his family found out. Of them both being challenged, tested, forced to prove their loyalty to the family and each other. They passed, somehow, and it was going so well. Dennis was an MS1, going onto his second year, and the Cody's provided him some hands on experience whenever someone got hurt. It was all so good until Andrew got caught. He talked about the isolation once Andy went away, of their belongings slowly getting sold until he lost his place. Finding out he was pregnant. His escape in the middle of the night with the emergency cash Andy kept hidden and a car that he sold for something cheap and anonymous. Of having Julia alone in a strange new city, of trying to figure out school and how to keep in contact with Andrew, of losing everything else, terrified he'll lose Jules as well.

She listened. Truly listened. Once he had finished, all she asked was if she could talk to Andrew herself.

The next week, on the day of their bi-monthly phone call, Trinity went into her room with Dennis' phone, probably giving his partner of 4 years a shovel talk. Unfortunately, this left Dennis on his own with a toddler having a tantrum.

Jules was a smart little girl, she knew that the phone call meant talking to her dad, and she's only little, she hates the word 'no' and doesn't understand 'wait' just yet - Dennis has to cling onto her at every crosswalk now that she's able to run.

Andrew received his shovel talk with the Jules screams of 'no' and 'dada' as background music. Dennis was still wrestling with her, little limbs bashing against his body as she wailed, crying that she didn't want him, she wanted her dada, when Trinity came back out. He could hear Andrew calling out above the noise of her cries. Trinity was quick to understand, pressing the phone to Jules' ear. It took a few minutes for her cries to quiet enough for her to hear Andy's soothing voice, but when she did, the effect was near immediate. She had curled herself up, phone grasped tightly in her little hands and pressed close to her face. Andrew was for sure getting a gross audio of her sniffles and gasping breath as she calmed down, always asking her about her days, what day care is like, if she's made many friends. She stumbles through responses, still slightly behind on her language skills from all the forced quiet homelessness caused them, but she still tries, and Andrew responds, carrying the conversation and distracting her for long enough Dennis could slip away and take a moment.

As usual, Dennis and Andrew only got a few minutes of conversation just for themselves - they had taken to primarily communicating through letters once Jules had gotten old enough to talk and understand and recognise Andrew's voice - asking each other how they were, exchanging words of devotion, promising that they will see each other soon, it will only feel like a few minutes, the same conversation bits they've been going over for the past two years or so. He's exhausted when they hang up. Jules is fast asleep, curled up to Trinity's side on the couch. Dennis scoops his baby up, and goes to bed.

Jules has her own crib, has since Trinity read up about the dangers of co-sleeping and freaked, but Jules hates it, only manages it for nap times, preferring to sleep by Dennis' side, just as she has done for most of her life. He tries his best, tries to get her in the crib most nights, often fighting back tears as she screams, begging to be next to him where she belongs. Tonight he recognises they both need this comfort.

Jules is passed out next to him, sprawled in the centre of the bed in a sleep sack he spent far too long getting her in. He lay his head next to hers, grazing her rosy cheeks and dark red curls with his fingertips, eyes growing heavy despite the fear of waking her up thrumming through his body. God, she was getting so big. He'd have to figure out what photos he should print out to send to Andrew with the next letter.

Just as he was about to start drifting off, the soft click of his door opening and closing, and the weight of another body on the mattress forced his eyes open. Trinity, softer than she ever lets herself be in the daylight, lies down on the other side of Jules, placing her hand on her chest to feel the baby's heavy breath go in and out. She keeps it there, just feeling the thrum of Jules' heart, proof she's alive and safe, until she snuffles. Then she drifts her hand over, stretching to catch Dennis' hand in hers, squeezing once, twice, thrice, before letting go and closing her eyes.

The next year was harder, especially at the beginning. Jules turned two and she had more teeth coming in, so was in pain for most of the day, and Dennis missed most of it anyway, stuck at an interview. Trinity had, in a panic, ended up taking Jules to the Pitt, terrified that something else was wrong when her face got red and hot from crying. Dennis definitely embarrassed himself rushing across town once he turned his phone back on, nearly falling on his ass when he got to the ED waiting room. Trinity had calmed down by the time they re-met, and now had the chore of reassuring Dennis. They left a few hours later, Jules receiving a clean bill of health and the diagnosis of another new tooth, receiving plenty of cuddles from the nurses and residents, and Dennis being threatened to bring her back for a visit some time soon.

It got worse before it even got close to better.

Jules went through another sleep regression, this one lasting six weeks, right around the time of exams. A couple nights before his final exam, when Jules was truly fighting sleep and waking up screaming at all hours of the night, that Trinity suggested he go away for a couple of days, to get a break and proper rest before his test. He should have accepted the offer, but the guilt of the idea was too overwhelming - he couldn't add to her distress, he would rather fail than make things worse for her.

He doesn't know how he passed.

And then it was graduation and matching - the anxiety of the cost of actually walking across the stage consumed him, he could barely feel excited about being matched to the Pitt. Never mind the stress of finding ways to entertain Jules until he started his residency.

It also didn't help that by late May Jules had figured out how to unlock and open all the doors in the apartment. Dennis has been awoken far too many times by his toddler playing with his door.

Dennis was cooking dinner, anxiety thrumming through his body as he hummed along to his kid friendly playlist (God what had fatherhood done to him) as he tried to distract himself from his upcoming graduation, when there was a knock at the apartment door. Before he even had time to process the sound and put his pan down, the loud padding of footsteps echoed down the hall. He had just yelled out 'Jules, no!' when he heard the click of the door.

The low thrum of stress turned into a tornado, pushing him to run to the door, nausea bubbling in the back of his throat. He had just turned the corner, nearly slipping over with how fast he was going, when he paused.

Right there, crouching in the doorway in front of little Julia, bag dropped to his side, hair far too short, was Andrew.

He was talking so softly to her, Dennis couldn't hear it over his heart, holding one hand out to her in offering. Jules knew his voice, there was no way she couldn't, but she was still shifting shyly in front of him - at least Dennis now knew she wouldn't run off with just anyone.

He all but stumbled over to them, breath heavy as he crouched down next to his daughter. She immediately began curling into his side, prying his hand to take hold of hers. He squeezed it gently, pressing a kiss to her forehead quickly, "Hey, baby, you know him, remember? This is dada." He guided her little hand, pressing it to Andrew's palm, sandwiching it with his own. Dennis allows himself to truly look at Andrew now, just in time to see tears fall from his red eyes, laughing wetly at seeing his baby.

Dennis lets go of their hands, reaching out to caress his partner's face, feeling the warm skin and new wrinkles that adorn his pretty face, pushing forward to press a kiss to his teary cheek, his own face probably just as wet. They stayed there for a few more moments, faces pressed together, breathing in each others air for the first time in three years, before they are being interrupted by a chubby hand patting both their cheeks, clumsily wiping the tears of their face. Jules keeps her palm pressed to Andrew's face, exploring the face she has only seen in two dimension before. He catches her hand as it drifts down to his mouth, holding in in place so he can press a kiss to it, smiling brightly when Jules giggles and shies away bashfully against Dennis's side.

Dennis pulls them both into the apartment eventually, never letting Andrew or Jules out of his sight. Jules eats dinner in her high chair between them, Andy telling her stories of his journey to Pittsburgh (Dennis will ask what really happened when there aren't little ears around), pressing his leg against Dennis' under the table, always trying to maintain physical contact with him.

Dennis guides Andrew through their bedtime routine, bathing and brushing her teeth before getting her into bed for story time, the older man following it with so much care. Jules still co-sleeps with Dennis, now, primarily, because the apartment isn't big enough for an appropriate bed. She still finds comfort being near Dennis, but she is now far too big for her crib, using it more as a climbing frame for the past four months whenever he tried to put her in it.

For the first time in her life, Jules falls asleep with both her dads surrounding her.

Andrew spends the first hour after she falls asleep just staring at her in wonder, watching as her rosy cheeks shift with each breath, so perfect. Dennis on her other side, looking as beautiful as he always has.

This is all he has ever wanted.

The two partners stay awake until the early hours of the morning, watching each other and their daughter, maintaining a softly murmured conversation, freezing any time Jules shifts just in case she wakes up, basking in each other's presence. Their hands find each other early in the night, tangling together, just as they did in the early days of their relationship when they were too shy to trade early morning kisses.