TypeBeanie

Rereading Rhythm of War and with shipper goggles firmly in place.

Kpp'Ar looked around curiously, then blinked at him in a perfect show of innocent confusion. "What is what?"

"You know what I mean. That, on your hands."

They both turned their attention to the extremities in question. As usual, Kpp'Ar's hands rested loosely on the handle of his ostentatious cane. Significantly less usual was the glossy, near-black plum color of his short fingernails.

"Oh, that." Kpp'Ar raised one hand to examine his fingertips, first close to his face, then at arms' length. "Your daughter's handiwork. She insisted the color would be 'so pretty,' and I certainly wasn't going to attempt debating the point with her. Would you?"

Viren chose to interpret the question as rhetorical. The polish was indeed a color he recalled seeing Lissa wear a time or two, and applied in a wobbly, haphazard manner that suggested an abundance of enthusiasm compensating for a distinct lack of expertise. It seemed Claudia, in her typical fashion, had picked up a new hobby and was eager to practice on anyone and everyone she could convince to allow it. Unfortunately, she could be very persuasive.

"Are you going to meet with the Council like that?" he asked, already dreading the answer.

"I don't see why not. After all, she was right: it is pretty."

"It's ridiculous. You're high mage, for heavens' sake."

"For now." A thin, knowing smile crossed Kpp'Ar's lips. "I'm sure Claudia will be thrilled to paint your nails in whatever color you like, once the title passes to you."

"I doubt I'll get much choice in the matter." Viren sighed, half in exasperation and half in defeat. "At least she has some time to master the art, first."

She is the Queen of Alethkar!

She survived an assassination attempt by jumping into a dangerous alternate dimension! 

She is a Scholar! She’s a historian! 

She murdered a group of men in front of her apprentice to prove a point!

She is a heretic!! An atheist! She doesn’t believe in God and it pisses people off! 

(^Side note, God actually hates her guts and has a personal vendetta against her)

She abolished slavery in her country! 

She believes that Gender Roles are stupid! She has published essays about it! 

She dumped her immortal/extremely powerful boyfriend because he didn’t respect her! 

^She did so by leaving a letter on his pillow and then ghosting him! 

SHE IS CANONICALLY ASEXUAL 

As requested by @im-bad-at-names-okay :)

Happy Pride Month! If Cosmere characters wanted to "come out," here is how they would do so.

1. Renarin: A series of unsigned letters

Lore drop: I came out via a letter to my parents when I was in high school.

Dalinar: The first note said, "Someone is gay." Dalinar: The second note said, "Someone you know." Dalinar: The third note said, "Someone in your family." Dalinar: The fourth note said, "One of your sons." Dalinar: ... Dalinar: I think I can predict what the fifth note will say.

2. Adolin: Tells people face-to-face

He just figures that telling people in person is the right thing to do.

Adolin: ...So anyway, I like men as well as women. May: Yes. I am aware. Adolin: Y-You are?? Did someone tell you?? May: You stare at a lot of butts. Adolin: ... Adolin: Yeah, okay, that makes sense.

3. Kaladin: The most dramatic moment possible

Think about every time Kaladin let someone know he was Radiant. Now apply that logic to Kaladin coming out.

Kaladin: [Glowing with stormlight, descending slowly from the sky] Kaladin: Romance. Sex. Gender. None of it--none of it--is compulsory, and none of it is for me! Lirin: You literally could have told us this normally at dinner last night. Hesina (elbowing him): Shhhh!

4. Wayne: Casually, conversationally

Wayne drops the lore as if it's no big deal, although he is admittedly a bit anxious the first time (when he tells Wax).

Wax: Listen, Wayne, if you want to be a good man... Wayne: Actually, I'm a girl today. Wax: [processing very quickly] Just today? Wayne: Well, we'll see, I guess. Sometimes it's just for a day. Sometimes it's a girl week. Wax: Noted. Wax: Listen, Wayne, if you want to be a good woman...

5. Rlain: Matter-of-factly

Rlain knows he has to make humans accept him as a person. Sometimes he tells them that he plays cards. Sometimes he tells them that he is gay.

Rlain: I'm Rlain. And this is my boyfriend, Renarin. The Alethi guy who was just talking shit about Singers: Uh... Rlain: Now you know something else about me. Rlain: Namely, I can pull.

6. Shallan: Eventually and with difficulty

Look, Shallan does not like to reveal lore about herself. Sometimes it takes being trapped in a cave in a high storm. Sometimes she makes her alters do it. It's a process.

Shallan (currently huddled with Kaladin in the little nook while the high storm rages outside) Shallan: ....A-And also, I think I have a crush on Jasnah! Shallan: Does that mean I like women??? Kaladin: Even worse, you might have bad taste in women! Shallan: What Kaladin: I shouldn't say my first thought.

7. Sazed: Makes Wax do it

This is always the Sazed-Harmony strategy.

Sazed: [communicating with Wax via his earring] Please tell everyone that my pronouns are now "they/them" so if they could stop using "he" for me, I'd appreciate it. Sazed: I know that there are other things going on, but it has been annoying me for hundreds of years now. Wax: ...You sent a kandra to command me to put in my earring for this...? Couldn't the kandra just do it...? Sazed: You try explaining pronouns to a kandra!

8. Vivenna: Just kinda assumed people knew

The short hair and the sword aren't enough??

Beard: Captain, we've been talking... Beard: And we've come up with a list of just three guys in all of Kholinar who we think MIGHT be worthy of going on a date with you! Vivenna: ...Try again, but with women. Beard: .... Beard: Oh! Vivenna (to herself): How much more obvious could I make it?

9. Jasnah: Writes a truly groundbreaking treatise

Jasnah is not going to bother coming out if it's not also scholarship.

Ethid: Your treatise on asexuality will truly have a lasting effect on scholarship. Jochi: I predict that the undertext referring to your own experiences will promote much speculation in future generations. Jasnah: Thank you, both. Jasnah: ...Glad that relationship was worth something.

10. Nikaro: Tells no one until they all figure it out for themselves

Nikaro can't shake the fear that everyone will leave if they know the truth, groundless as that fear may be.

Akane: Last week you had a boyfriend. Yumi: Correct. Akane: Today you have a girlfriend. Yumi: I do. Akane: Your girlfriend looks quite a bit like my old friend, Nikaro. Yumi: Fancy that. Akane: ... Akane: Congrats on the gender, Painter! Painter: ...It's that easy?

11. Dalinar: Unintentional lore drop

Dalinar is one of Those dads.

You guys ever seen Gravity Falls? Theres an episode where someone is trying to convince his sister to play a D&Desque game and she looks at the box art and says she’d consider playing “if that hot elf’s got anything to do with it”. And that was my thought process with Dragon Prince.

This hot elf has seduced (in every context) many a pawn in his game. He’s canonically Xadia’s sexyman.