Awkward Entertainment

I actually hate being sappy like I’ll say “I missed you today” then immediately drag them to diffuse the situation

“Where were you today? I missed u. Thought ya lil ugly ass went and joined the soul circus”

i love little kids with very niche interests. Like for awhile I nannied for a family who had a little girl who loved old black and white movies. She adopted a transatlantic accent, constantly wore a long string of plastic pearls, and would often dramatically drape herself over pieces of furniture when told to do something and say “I just can’t do it babe”

i once dropped her stuffed animal and she yelled “there’s been a murder!”

Honestly shoutout to The Social Network for giving us the line “you’re going to go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole” because if that doesn’t epitomize women’s feelings for entitled male nerds I don’t know what does

Not to get political but my philosophy is fundamentally that all people should suffer less. That it’s everyone’s responsibility to try to make the world a little better for everyone else. And anyone trying to do the opposite is an asshole who needs to stop.

i love the term “partners” are we dating? are we robbing a bank? do we run a legal firm? are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit? who knows.

Men think it’s ruder for a woman to say “don’t interrupt me” than it is for them to interrupt her in the first place

id probably call that ruder. Jus cause I interrupt someone don’t mean I was mentally thinking bout cutting this annoying ass bitch off. it just so happened my g.

I know you would call that ruder. That’s what the post was about.

What pokemon is this?

Why am i laughing so hard?

THE FUCKING HANDS