library of roonya

Some video games really don’t let you make old people. You slide the age or maturity slider over and it barely does anything. I want to write the story of a grandma that likes shooting guns and causing problems is that really too much to ask

I wanna roleplay as a weightlifting old man who has been divorced twice and likes punching demons but video games have decided this is unrealistic but dragons and plasma guns are not

"everybody hates me" factoid actually just a statistical error. The average person doesn't hate you, especially not your friends. You, a person who sits in your room experiencing self loathing every day, are an outlier adn should not have been counted.

This is sweet but I really thought it was going to end with someone named “Haters Horge” who spends every second in a cave halfway across the world just loathing you for no reason and they were the statistical outlier

Don't be your own Haters Horge

Throw Haters Horge in a Disastrous Gorge

fuck my stupid baka life but not this gay earth. never this gay earth

WELP, that ends my account.

Qobuz is the most ethical alternative to spotify and even tidal (tidal is just pandora radio in a different font; you can't curate playlists, which i absolutely fucking hate, but you can curate playlists on qobuz, and the royalties they pay to their artists are far larger than spotify) that i've been able to find, thanks to this post on instagram by singer-songwriter laura burhenn. the post also lists other alternatives, including tidal, but qobuz is by far the best of the lot. they even have a free feature called soundiiz where you can transfer all of your playlists from spotify to qobuz!

Worth a reblog for this great info.

“oooh i need junji ito to write me an essay” okay so youre a little baby so youre a little baby waby who needs mommys help

not junji ito. where did he come from. this is supposed to say chatgpt

another completely flat woman cursed to have a fandom of people who are determined to give her boobs. sad!!!

Dad loves you and feeds you. But he is also dumb and feeds you a wonderfully done wagyu steak. You are 3 days old.

Happy father’s day to the Krestel single dad of 6 Who is doing a wonderful job

Common kestrel (Falco tinnunculus)

Official ornithology post

Imagine you’re chilling at home with your siblings and some alien thing beyond your understanding breaks into your home and just puts more siblings in there

@derinthescarletpescatarian Yeah, I used to watch Brady Bunch too.

I watch a lot of tiny home/camper build videos and they're usually very chill, laid back affairs but I started watching one about a tiny camper for abandoned railroading and the vibe is putrid. choppy editing. 'zany' sound effects. dated pop culture references. these men are surely Bros of some kind.

every 5 minutes they seem to add another guy. one of the adult men using various large power tools has to be told what 'conical' means. they try lifting it but it's too heavy so they try lifting it again using thick wooden beams and are surprised that didn't make it lighter. I fear they will live.

and when I say they try lifting it with wooden beams, I don't mean using leverage or anything so boringly scientific, I mean they just pass thick wooden beams underneath the thing that was too heavy to lift and then try lifting the beams, which snap in half due to the weight and forces involved. this surprises the men.

a cop has arrived and told them they need permission to tootle their ramshackle homemade vehicle up and down on a railway line, to their further surprise.

because they're all white, the cop actually suggests some different abandoned tracks they could try, so off they go and THEY HAVEN'T SCOUTED THE TRACK AT ALL. THEY CHEERFULLY SAY THEY DON'T KNOW WHERE IT GOES.

THEY HIT THE FIRST CURVE IN THE LINE AND ABRUPTLY REALISE THEY DON'T KNOW WHETHER THEIR SOLID FRAME VEHICLE CAN EVEN FIT ON CURVED TRACK

THEY ARE TESTING THE BRAKES NOW FOR THE FIRST TIME!!!

it has a single battery that runs out of power in the middle of nowhere. they have no choice but to plug it in and wait. they explore nearby woods and find a Cave and some Bones. one of the men decides to throw a rock into the cave. go apologise to the writers of every horror movie you've ever seen.

they keep talking about how there might be bears and now they're having a cookout they have opened food and left it lying around and there might be bears and the food is not in airtight containers and there might be bears.

they powerbank they're using to charge the engine is now also being used to play Fortnite

THERE IS A MYSTERIOUS LIGHT APPROACHING FROM THEIR REAR SO THEY DECIDE TO ALL GET INSIDE AND TURN THE LIGHTS OFF. THEIR VEHICLE DOES NOT APPEAR TO HAVE ANY EXTERIOR LIGHTS.

the engine has not magically unfucked itself in the night and their adventure abruptly ends with them all regretably still alive

I have never been more disappointed in a resolution

if i met battat in real life i would ask if he'd ever considered that mike's last name could be "hock" & he would seriously consider it then kill me once he realized. if i met tenna in real life i would throw a remote at his big gay head