Torchwood's Eye Candy

I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated so when the other person said hello you’d get connected to them, so I just launch right into my “Harvard University and NPR blah blah blah” thing and then there’s this long pause and I think the person’s hung up even though I didn’t hear a click

And then I hear “you shouldn’t be able to call this number.”

So I apologize and go into the preset spiel about because we aren’t selling anything, etc. etc. and the answer I get is

“No, I know that. What I mean is that it should be impossible for you to call this number, and I need to know how you got it.”

I explain that it’s randomly generated and I’m very sorry for bothering him, and go to hang up. And before I can click terminate, I hear:

“Ma’am, this is a matter of national security.”

I accidentally called the director of the FBI.

There was no MS Dos involved. Instead, there was a proprietary type-based OS and an actually-uses-transistors refrigerator-sized computer with switches I had to trip at certain times during the night as I watched the data flow from six pm to six AM on Fridays and weekends. If things got stuck, I reset the server. 

The company handled everything from low-end data (hotel and car reservations) to flight plans and tower information. I was weighed every time I came in to make sure it was me. Areas of the building had retina scanners on doors. 

During training. they took us through all the procedures. Including the procedures for the red phone. There was, literally, a red phone on the shelf above my desk. “This is a holdover from the cold war.” They said. “It isn’t going to come up, but here’s the deal. In case of nuclear war or other nation-wide disaster, the phone will ring. Pick up the phone, state your name and station, and await instructions. Do whatever you are told.”

So my third night there, it’s around 2am and there’s a ringing sound. 

I look up, slowly. The Red phone is ringing.

So I reach out, I pick up the phone. I give my name and station number. And I hear every station head in the building do the exact same. One after another, voices giving names and numbers. Then silence for the space of two breaths. Silence broken by…

“Uh… Is Shantavia there?”

It turns out that every toll free, 1-900 or priority number has a corresponding local number that it routs to at its actual destination. Some poor teenage girl was trying to dial a friend of hers, mixed up the numbers, and got the atomic attack alert line for a major air-travel corporation’s command center in the mid-west United States.

There’s another pause, and the guys over in the main data room are cracking up. The overnight site head is saying “I think you have the wrong number, ma’am.” and I’m standing there having faced the specter of nuclear annihilation before I was old enough to legally drink.

Seriously, this is legit.

In December 1955, Sears decided to run a Santa hotline.  Here’s the ad they posted.

Only problem is, they misprinted the number.  And the number they printed?  It went straight through to fucking NORAD.  This was in the middle of the Cold War, when early warning radar was the only thing keeping nuclear annihilation at bay.  NORAD was the front line.

And it wasn’t just any number at NORAD.  Oh no no no.

Terri remembers her dad had two phones on his desk, including a red one. “Only a four-star general at the Pentagon and my dad had the number,” she says.

“This was the ‘50s, this was the Cold War, and he would have been the first one to know if there was an attack on the United States,” Rick says.

The red phone rang one day in December 1955, and Shoup answered it, Pam says. “And then there was a small voice that just asked, ‘Is this Santa Claus?’ ”

His children remember Shoup as straight-laced and disciplined, and he was annoyed and upset by the call and thought it was a joke — but then, Terri says, the little voice started crying.

“And Dad realized that it wasn’t a joke,” her sister says. “So he talked to him, ho-ho-ho’d and asked if he had been a good boy and, ‘May I talk to your mother?’ And the mother got on and said, ‘You haven’t seen the paper yet? There’s a phone number to call Santa. It’s in the Sears ad.’ Dad looked it up, and there it was, his red phone number. And they had children calling one after another, so he put a couple of airmen on the phones to act like Santa Claus.”

“It got to be a big joke at the command center. You know, ‘The old man’s really flipped his lid this time. We’re answering Santa calls,’ ” Terri says.

And then, it got better.

“The airmen had this big glass board with the United States on it and Canada, and when airplanes would come in they would track them,” Pam says.

“And Christmas Eve of 1955, when Dad walked in, there was a drawing of a sleigh with eight reindeer coming over the North Pole,” Rick says.

“Dad said, ‘What is that?’ They say, ‘Colonel, we’re sorry. We were just making a joke. Do you want us to take that down?’ Dad looked at it for a while, and next thing you know, Dad had called the radio station and had said, ‘This is the commander at the Combat Alert Center, and we have an unidentified flying object. Why, it looks like a sleigh.’ Well, the radio stations would call him like every hour and say, ‘Where’s Santa now?’ ” Terri says.

For real.

“And later in life he got letters from all over the world, people saying, ‘Thank you, Colonel,’ for having, you know, this sense of humor. And in his 90s, he would carry those letters around with him in a briefcase that had a lock on it like it was top-secret information,” she says. “You know, he was an important guy, but this is the thing he’s known for.”

“Yeah,” Rick [his son] says, “it’s probably the thing he was proudest of, too.”

So yeah.  I think that might be the best wrong number of all time.

The Importance of Comprehensive Sexual Education:

“Research has identified highly effective sex education and HIV prevention programs that affect multiple behaviors and/or achieve positive health impacts. Behavioral outcomes have included delaying the initiation of sex as well as reducing the frequency of sex, the number of new partners, and the incidence of unprotected sex, and/or increasing the use of condoms and contraception among sexually active participants. Long-term impacts have included lower STI and/or pregnancy rates.” [x]

We need to equip people with knowledge and resources to maintain a healthy and safe lifestyle. By teaching comprehensive sex education we are allowing people to make informed decisions about their health and and personal lives. - Paige

The Basics (Anatomy and Biological functions):

What is a vagina?

What is a vulva? (Basic Anatomy inside links.)

What is the vagina’s biological function during sexual intercourse (specifically PIV sex)?

What is the uterus and what is it’s biological function?

What is a hymen and what are the different kinds of hymens?

What is the purpose of a hymen?

Which hole does urine come out of and which hole does menstruation come out of?

Menstrual Cycle:

What is a menstrual cycle?

What is menstruation?

Why do we menstruate?

How to use pads, tampons, and menstrual cups.

What is ovulation?

Vaginal Hygiene:

The vagina, is in fact, designed to keep itself clean with the help of natural secretions (discharge). But there are ways you can help maintain the cleanliness of your vagina (i.e. avoiding perfumed soaps and gently washing the vulva area, not the actual vagina.) Click the link for more information.

*Vaginal odors and discharge; what’s normal and what’s not?

What is douching?

What are Pap Smears?

“A Pap smear, also called a Pap test, is a procedure to test for cervical cancer in people. A Pap smear involves collecting cells from your cervix — the lower, narrow end of your uterus that’s at the top of your vagina.”

When do I need a pap smear?

What are vaginal orgasms? Clitoral orgasms? G-Spot orgasms? How can you achieve an orgasm?

“A “vaginal orgasm” is the notion that [people] can have an orgasm through stimulation during intercourse or other vaginal penetration, entirely without clitoral stimulation. However, the vagina has few nerve endings, and therefore cannot create an orgasm on its own. Instead of thinking of the vagina and clitoris as separate entities, try thinking about them as a network of nerves and muscles.”

“There’s some disagreement about the size of the G-spot; it may range from a quarter inch to a couple inches along the upper wall of your vagina, about an inch or two past your vaginal opening. Underneath it is highly sensitive tissue that, when touched the right way, triggers feelings of sexual happiness, explains Debby Herbenick, PhD.”

Myths and facts about orgasms.

Tips on how to have an orgasm.

Having trouble reaching an orgasm? No worries, there is help! [x][x]

Female Genital Mutilation Information:

“Female genital mutilation (FGM) includes procedures that intentionally alter or cause injury to the female genital organs for non-medical reasons.”

“The procedure has no health benefits for girls and women.”

“Procedures can cause severe bleeding and problems urinating, and later cysts, infections, infertility as well as complications in childbirth and increased risk of newborn deaths.”

“FGM is a violation of the human rights of girls and women.”

The Basics (Anatomy and Biological Functions):

What is a penis?

What are testicles? (Basic Anatomy inside links.)

What is the penis’ biological function during sexual intercourse? (Specifically PIV sex.)

Examining your testicles for Testicular Cancer: How to.

Penile Hygiene:

“Gently wash the penis with warm water each day when you’re having a shower or bath. If you have a foreskin, pull it back gently and wash underneath.”

“Gently washing your penis once a day with warm water is sufficient to maintain good hygiene. If you want to use soap, choose a mild or non-perfumed soap to reduce the risk of skin irritation.”

What is an erection and ejaculation?

“An erection begins in the brain. Physical and/or mental stimulation cause nerves in the brain to send chemical messages to nerves in the penis telling the penile blood vessels to relax so that blood can flow freely into the penis. Once in the penis, high pressure traps the blood within both corpora cavernosa. This causes the penis to expand and sustain an erection.”

“Ejaculation, the release of semen at climax, is triggered when a person reaches a critical level of excitement.”

*Overcoming ejaculation problems.

Is ejaculation and having an orgasm the same thing?

What is semen and what does it do?

What is Erectile Dysfunction? Treatments.

What is circumcision & is it medically necessary?

“Circumcision is the removal of a simple fold of skin (the `foreskin’ or `prepuce’) that covers the head (glans) of the un-erect penis.”

While there are benefits of being circumcised, it is not medically necessary.

The Basics:

What is masturbation and how do you do it?

Why do people masturbate?

Is masturbating normal and can it be harmful? (Short answer: Masturbation is normal, and no it is not harmful!)

WebMDs Masturbation FAQ.

The benefits of masturbation: [x] [x]

An Asexual’s Guide to Masturbation.

What is sex?

People define “sex” in different ways. Some people believe that it only counts as sex if a penis goes into a vagina, but this isn’t true for everybody. There are lots of different ideas about what sex can be: Vaginal sex (penis-in-vagina intercourse), Oral sex (mouth-to-genital contact), Anal sex (penis-in-anus intercourse), Dry humping or genital rubbing, Fingering or hand jobs (hand-to-genital contact), and Masturbation.

What is oral sex?

What is anal sex?

Why do people have sex?

How to have safe sex. (STI and pregnancy prevention goes more in depth below!)

What is Consent and is it mandatory?

“Whenever you have sex, you need to make sure that your partner is just as enthusiastic about having sex. In other words, that they give their full consent.” Consent is an enthusiastic, freely-given, uncoerced, sober, “yes”.

Consent is ALWAYS mandatory, whether you’re married, dating or just met.

What is sex without consent? Rape/Sexual Assault.

What is sexual assault? What is rape? (Resources below.)

Sexual assault can be verbal, visual, or anything that forces a person to join in unwanted sexual contact or attention.

What do I do if I’ve been sexually assaulted?

Sexual assault prevention and awareness.

Resources for sexual assault victims: United States.

Resources for sexual assault victims: Canada.

Resources for sexual assault victims: United Kingdom.

More international resources.

More resources.

Is sex supposed to hurt the first time?

"While it’s common for [some] to feel pain or discomfort with sex, it’s not “normal” in that it has to happen or there isn’t an alternative. Sex is not supposed to hurt: it’s supposed to feel very good.” [Inside the link above, it does explain what to do to make sure sex is not painful.]

Are there benefits to having sex?

10 Surprising Health Benefits of Sex.

Top 11 Benefits of Having Sex.

14 Unexpected Benefits of Having Sex.

What does MOGII mean?

Marginalized Orientation, Gender Identity, and Intersex. It’s a synonym for LGBTQIAP+ and is inclusive for people who don’t have or don’t want labels, rejects allies, and uses no reclaimed slurs.

What is a sexual orientation?

"Sexual orientation describes to whom a person is sexually attracted. Some people are attracted to people of a particular gender; others are attracted to more than one gender. Some are not attracted to anyone.”

“Affectional orientation is a term that describes to whom a person is romantically attracted, acknowledging that for many people there are more components to attraction than just sexual desire.”

What is gender identity?

“The ways in which a person identifies and/or expresses their gender, including self-image, appearance, and embodiment of gender roles. One’s sex (e.g., male, female, intersex, etc.) is usually assigned at birth based on one’s physical biology. One’s gender (e.g., man, woman, genderqueer, etc.) is one’s internal sense of self and identity.”

Some gender identities.

Some more gender identities.

Genderqueer and Non Binary Identities.

Resources for most Gender Identities. (Resources for understanding gender identity, figuring out yours, how to come out to parents and friends, transitioning resources, local supports, and more!)

What is asexuality?

"Some people who identify as asexual do not experience sexual attraction to other people, while others experience sexual attraction but no desire to act on these attractions.”

“Asexuality and Celibacy are not the same. Many people who are asexual live a celibate life, meaning that they do not engage in sex with others. But while Celibacy is a choice, asexuality is not.”

“Asexuality is not a dysfunction, and there is no need to find a "cause” or a “cure.”“ [x]

Are all people who identify as asexual sex repulsed? No!

Asexual Visibility and Education Network.

What does transgender mean? (Resources below!)

"Transgender – or trans – is an umbrella term for people whose gender identity or expression is different from those typically associated with the sex assigned to them at birth (e.g., the sex listed on their birth certificate).” [x]

“Transgender may be used to describe someone who was assigned female or male at birth, but later realizes that label doesn’t accurately reflect who they feel they are inside.”

Resources for transgender people.

More resources for transgender people

Coming Out as Trans

All About Gender Therapy

Trans Health Matters: Trans Women

Trans Health Matters: Trans Men

Top 10 Trans-Friendly Colleges

What does intersex mean?

“Intersex” is a general term used for a variety of conditions in which a person is born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn’t seem to fit the typical definitions of female or male.

How common is intersex?

Intersex Society of North America.

Resources for intersex people.

What are STIs, how do you get them, and what are the symptoms?

“A sexually transmissible infection (STI) is any infection or disease that can be passed from one person to another during sexual activity. Sexually transmissible infections include chlamydia, herpes, gonorrhea, syphilis, genital herpes, scabies, pubic lice (crabs), hepatitis and HIV (the virus that causes AIDS).”

Why do we call them STIs now and not STDs?

Everyone is at risk of obtaining an STI, but some are more at risk.

STIs that can be contracted through non-sexual contact.

How do you protect yourself from STIs?

Female / male condoms and dental dams.

Finger cots (finger condoms).

Post-exposure prophylaxis, is a short-term antiretroviral treatment to reduce the likelihood of HIV infection after potential exposure.

Know the signs and symptoms of an STI. If you notice a symptom that worries you, get checked out!

How do I get tested for STIs?

What treatments are out there for STIs?

What is pregnancy? When are you considered to be pregnant? How do you get pregnant?

To be pregnant is to have an embryo/fetus developing in your uterus. “A pregnancy is considered to be established only after implantation is complete.”

"When engaging in unprotected vaginal intercourse during which ejaculation of sperm occurs in the vagina. The sperm can then travel up through the cervix, into the uterus, and, if an egg is present, the sperm may fertilize it.”

“It is also possible — but less likely — for a person to become pregnant through any kind of sex play in which semen, or ejaculate, comes in contact with the vulva. The sperm can travel through the moisture on the vulva into the vagina.”

WebMD’s Online Pregnancy Center.

What to Expect: Pregnancy.

Pregnancy Resources.

What are my options if I get pregnant?

If you’re pregnant you have three options; parenting, adoption, and abortion.

Only you can decide what is right for you, definitely take some time to go over your options, but remember, the sooner you decide the more options you’ll have.

Resources for Decision Making and Low Income Parenting.

Abortion funds and Judicial Bypass.

How do you prevent pregnancy? (Check out birth control masterpost below.)

“Birth control allows us to prevent pregnancy and plan the timing of pregnancy.”

Birth control is not a “one size fit’s all deal” there are all different kinds of birth control out there from hormonal to non hormonal, methods to medicines, and so on. The best way to figure out which birth control works best for you is by doing research and speaking with your doctor.

****Contraceptives Masterpost**** ^^ Lists many birth control options (and links you to more information about these options),  goes over emergency contraceptives and FAQs, birth control FAQs, options for people with allergies or personal preferences, and debunks myths about birth control.

Lubricants that should not be used on condoms.

Where can I obtain birth control/contraceptives?

Guide to getting privacy under parent’s health insurance.

10 Ways to save on Birth Control.

The 5 Steps of a Breast Self Exam: Checking for Breast Cancer.

Sex Ed for physically, emotionally, and mentally disabled youth.

Sex Ed for Youth with disability or chronic illness.

I am perfectly happy working 8 hrs a day because I don’t have to:

grow my own food

find my own clean water

heat my house

I want to start researching how to become a successful indie author. Does anyone have recommendations for books, website, Facebook groups, podcasts, etc. where I can learn the trade?

First, what do you mean by successful? Do you measure success by sheer numbers of books sold? By profits made? By people reading your book? Or some other benchmark.

Being a successful Indie Author means treating writing like a small business and behaving accordingly.

Your first step is going to be defining what your goal related to being successful is. I use a writing plan to lay out my yearly goals. You can read more about my writing plan Here or read about how to make your own here.

Writing/ Business Related books:

2☆ Freelance and Technical Writers: Words for Sale – Camden Flath

3☆ The Essential Guide to Writing a Novel: A Complete and Concise Manual for Fiction Writers – James Stewart Thayer

3☆ Page after Page – Heather Sellers

3☆ Small Business Survival Guide – Cliff Ennico

3☆ The Call of the Writer's Craft: Writing and Selling the Book Within – Tom Bird

4☆ The Art of War for Writers: Fiction Writing Strategies, Tactics, and Exercises - James Scott Bell

4☆ Outlining Your Novel: Map Your Way to Success – K.M. Weiland

4☆ What’s your Purple Goldfish? - Stan Phelps

4☆ Silent Sales Machine 9.0 – Jim Cockrum

4☆ What would Google Do – Jeff Jarvis

4☆ How to make Big Money in your small business – Jeffery Fox

4☆ Invent it, Sell It, Bank It – Lori Greiner

4☆ No Plot? No Problem! – Chris Baty

5☆ The Pocket Muse – Monica wood

5☆ How to Write Mysteries – Shannon O’Cork

5☆ On Writing – Stephen King

Blogs:

TCKPublishing’s blog has some good posts.

I already mentioned EADeverall’s site, but it bears repeating.

ScribeMedia’s blog has useful resources, but they are trying to sell a service.

BookBuzz has a good blog, but again its trying to sell a service.

Kindleprenuer’s blog is full of info.

Bookmarketingtools.com has a blog on how to do book promotions.

Print Publications:

If you can afford it get a subscription to Publisher’s Weekly or PW magazine to keep on top of industry news.

general advice:

There is a large writing community on twitter. It’s where a lot of publishers, agents, and book enthusiasts are, however, the community is very much a numbers game. If all you follow are writers, and all that follows you are writers, then your target audience, - readers- aren’t actually going to be seeing your posts. I have yet to figure out how to work the writer demographic to my favor. I’ve gotten a couple book sales through twitter, but not as many books as I’ve bought from other writers on twitter. On Twitter I tend to follow the writing community hashtag. I follow too many people to think of any to recommend off the top of my head.

I do most of my book sales in person at things like craft fairs and local vendor events. Finding them takes doing some networking and you have to be looking for opportunities or you won’t notice them. Search for “vendor” facebook groups for your areas. Join those. Contact your local library and bookstores. Let them know who you are and what you’re doing.

Take advantage of your library read every book on writing and every book on business/sales/ marketing they have available. Join any local writing groups, contact any local book clubs. Etc.

Take advantage of local media. When you release a book contact your local papers/ radio stations and let them know, “hey I live in the area and I have a book coming out on x date, we’ll be having a book release party at [venue], would you be interested in attending”

Some posts:

3 Things that Make a good indie book cover

How to make a story file

My posts

Risk Tolerance in Writing

Writing Records to Keep

My post about the Writing Assessments I mentioned earlier

Political/informational: 

Indigenous Writes: A Guide to First Nations, Métis and Inuit Issues in Canada by Chelsea Vowel

Tsawalk: A Nuu-chah-nulth Worldview by hereditary chief Umeek, E. Richard Atleo (softcover edition and PDF available through UBC Press)

Fiction: 

Son of a Trickster by Eden Robinson (highly recommended!) 

Monkey Beach by Eden Robinson

Indian Horse by Richard Wagamese

Not in the video, but if you have a middle/high schooler in your life or want to read it yourself, I recommend The Barren Grounds by David Alexander Robertson

Poetry:

This Accident of Being Lost by Leanne Betasamosake Simpson

This Wound is a World by Billy-Ray Belcourt (not available at GoodMinds.com - available from UMN Press)

Islands of Decolonial Love by Leanne Betasamosake Simpson

Comic:

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer (Nonfiction)

There There by Tommy Orange (Historical Fiction)

Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger (YA)

Works by

Natasha Kanape Fontaine (poetry)

Sherman Alexie (poetry)

Richard Wagamese (fiction)

Louise Erdrich (fiction)

Tommy Pico (YA)

A book I can personally recommend:

Bad Indians: A Tribal Memoir by Deborah Miranda (nonfiction) 

Like from what I’ve seen, she’s had well known roles in film and tv, specifically from the Harold and Kumar movies and One Tree Hill, and she was also in Ten Inch Hero, the same movie everyone loves showing stills of Jensen in. It’s not that hard to think maybe the writers just had her in mind for a role because sometimes that’s just what happens? Roles are sometimes made with specific people in mind to play them. Or maybe she’s taking more roles because she feels like her kids are grown enough that it’s fine if she and Jensen are both acting? And she just auditioned for a role and got it? And maybe she and Jensen were just excited by the idea of being in another project together?