Librarian to the stars

According to Billy Mays, OxiClean will take that crimson stain right out of your underwear. From the New York “Evening World,” 10/27/1916 [p.21].

Something for Donald Trump​ to consider, since he’s so preoccupied by temperament. Washington, D.C. Herald [10/12/1916]

First liberals came for “Dixie”; next they came for the Confederate flag. When will the persecution end? From the New York, N.Y. “Evening World,” 9/15/1916 [p.6].

It seems we have always spoiled our kids, whenever we have the means. New York, NY Evening World, 12/16/1915 [p.21].

Santa held the family hostage for hours, demanding entertainment while he fondled a little girl. New York, NY Evening World, 12/9/1915 [p.9].

When you’re a kid and you realize Santa looks and acts differently everywhere you see him, and one night soon he will come creeping into your house. Christmas is never the same. Mexico, MO “Message,” 12/9/1915 [p.1].

#firstworldproblems, 1915: "why am I always thirsty for water after meals?” New York Evening World, 12/1/1915 [p.6].

Proof that 100 yrs. ago, Obama was already scheming a federal takeover of the health care system. Washington D.C. Herald, 12/1/1915 [p.15].

Football was a more dangerous sport 100 years ago. I wonder if anyone tracks the number of deaths today? Seattle Star, 11/25/1915 [p.7].

“After a time throw the dog a little..., and he will soon learn to catch himself squarely on his feet.” Seattle Star, 11/25/1915 [p.5].

“President stalked, groomed his god-daughter throughout her childhood, until he could marry her.” Seattle, WA Star, 11/19/2015 [p.4].

The artist behind this fanciful “armored auto” believes that war occurs on well-made roads. Seattle [WA] Star, 11/19/1915 [p.3].

Posting for the Hazelnut cake recipe. Washington D.C. Herald, 11/19/1915 [p.8].

Little girl lacks the Thanksgiving spirit: “You want me to do what now with that axe?” New York [NY] Evening World, 11/18/1915 [p.13].

I heard you don’t like dust so here’s some dust in a can to sprinkle around before you dust. New York, NY Evening World, 11/18/1915 [p.12].

The “liver squeeze exercise” seems to have been a variant of the “passing gas” exercise. New York [NY] Evening World, 11/18/1915 [p.10].

The wisdom of 1915: “The greatest crabs are not always the best meat.” Washington, D.C. Herald, 11/18/1915 [p.8].